


Master of My Domain

by birdie7272



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Crack, Destiel - Freeform, Fluff, Funny, Gabriel Being Gabriel, Humor, If you only read one work by me, M/M, Masturbation, Podfic Welcome, Sabriel - Freeform, Seinfeld - Freeform, Sexy Times, Smut, Taunting, Teasing, gabrielives, horny everyone, human cas, master of my domain, sex withdrawl, shameless smut-o-rama, the contest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-09
Updated: 2015-08-09
Packaged: 2018-02-20 11:34:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 57,480
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2427182
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/birdie7272/pseuds/birdie7272
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean, Sam, Cas, and Gabe are all stuck in the bunker due to reasons unknown.  In their boredom, a sexy contest emerges.  Who is the true master of their domain?  Last one to wank wins.<br/>(Seinfeld? Yes.)  Destiel, Sabriel, and shameless smutty tease-o-rama.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue: The Contest

**Author's Note:**

> Not cannon timeline. Gabe is unquestioned as alive (#gabrielives), Bobby is alive, Kevin is not there, and Cas is newly human. Just…don’t question anything.

Stupid Gabriel and his stupid messing around.

How he managed to wiggle his way into the bunker was still a mystery to Dean, Sam, and Cas who had all been cooped up inside at the time the angel mysteriously popped into their kitchen and started eating their pop tarts.

Dean's _labeled_ pop tarts.

It was just the four of them inside and it was going to stay that way because whatever Gabe did, he locked them in. No matter how much kicking Dean did or chanting Sam gave or fingers Gabe snapped or awkwardly Cas stood, the doors would not budge.

Not a single one. Not a single inch.

Gabe couldn't even fly out without slamming his head into the ceiling.

It was actually pretty amusing, to everyone but him.

On top of being stuck, they were cut off from all forms of research. Any book they tried to pick up would fly across the room or disappear from their hands. The internet, wifi and Ethernet, was completely out. All the technology worked -thankfully the fridge and microwave were still running- but research was a complete no-go.

It was as if the bunker did not want them to leave.

Stupid bunker.

"What did you do?!" Dean yelled at Gabriel for the hundredth time.

"Nothing! Can't you get us out?"

"If I could get us out do you think I'd be here staring at your ugly face?"

"Guys," Sam tried to intervene. "Come on. Fighting won't get us anywhere."

"Yeah Dean-o. Listen to your brother."

"Whatever." Dean stomped off to his room to detox with music and a healthy dose of glaring at his ceiling.

"I'll see if he's alright," Cas said helpfully –he hoped- as he trailed Dean to his room.

"I'm going to call Bobby." Luckily the phones still worked. "You-" Sam pointed to Gabe. "Don't touch anything."

"Sure thing boss!" Gabe winked and waited until Sam was out of the room to start twisting knobs, pushing buttons, and turning dials.

When everyone reconvened, Sam said that Bobby would be ready to bust them out as soon as he figured out how to do it. Which, according to Bobby, would take a week because he was halfway across the country and it would take him a few days just to get back to his books.

"Great," Dean nodded sarcastically. "That's just great. So we're stuck here?"

"Oh, don't get your panties in a bunch." Gabe lounged in one of the chairs surrounding the large wooden table with his feet thrown up on the tabletop. He stuck his tongue out at Dean when he wouldn't stop glaring.

"Why are you here anyway?"

"Yeah." Sam asked, much calmer than Dean, "Why are you here?"

"What? I can't pay my bestest humans a visit?" Gabe gestured to all three of them and landed his gaze on Cas. "Check up on the little bro?"

"I find human life quite confusing," Cas answered him as if it were a question.

"He's not actually concerned, Cas," Dean growled.

"Sure I am. Especially now. I'm worried about all of you."

"Us?" Sam asked.

"You lot," Gabe nodded. "Humans. Without your wifi with free internet porn and all those pent up primal urges."

"Excuse you?" Dean sneered, too pissed off to stop himself from clomping his fists on the table.

"Alright-" Gabe threw his hands up, "-some stuff you gotta do. Eat and sleep and all that. But down under? You can't control yourself."

"I think I can control myself just fine. I'm not killing you am I? And what about you?!" Dean yelled and pointed at the candy bar Gabe was currently unwrapping. "Poofing things in whenever you want them. We didn't have Twix!"

"I do that cus I want to," Gabe mumbled around the bit in his mouth. "I don't _need_ to do anything. I'm the master of my domain. Not like you. There's a reason you need to hit up a bar in every town you stop in. Looking for a way to get off when your brother's hogging the shower-"

"Gabriel-" Sam tried to stop the argument but he went unheard. Again.

"I don't need to," Dean scoffed. "My domain is just fine. I just like to have a good time."

"Wanna bet?" Gabe wiggled his brows suggestively, pushing Dean until he hooked onto the bait like a wriggly river minnow.

"What'd'ya mean?"

"Oh no," Sam sighed and sunk back in his chair.

Cas kept standing as he looked between them all and shrugged. "I don't understand. What is happening?"

"We're stuck right?" Gabe went on, still fully engaged with Dean. "And you, as humans, will want yourselves a little happy time. Some spank and wank? Clean your flag pole? Polish the little soldier?" His musings went unamused. "I bet you guys can't last the week without needing to get down'n'dirty-"

"Whoa!" Sam threw up his hands, "Hey, when did I become a part of this?"

"You're on," Dean nodded.

"No sex, no touching, no wet dreams-"

"We can't control that," Dean argued.

"Fine. Just no coming out of your own will."

"What about you?"

"What about me?" Gabe managed to look offended.

"You think you're so much better? I bet you can't last."

"I'm an angel. Celibacy is in the job description."

"Not with you."

"Fine. You wanna get schooled? No one gets any yayas," Gabe stared pointedly at every one of them. "Last man standing –painfully erect- gets what?"

"I did not agree to this," Sam sighed behind his hand.

"Afraid you'll lose Sammy?" Gabe prodded him in his side, eliciting a deep groan from the other man.

"What about Cas?" Dean jabbed his thumb back at the confused former angel.

"Me?" Cas sounded even more confused than he looked.

"He's Cas," Dean continued. "Does he even know what we're talking about?"

"I understand–"

"Do you even do that stuff?" Dean sounded a bit too interested in getting that answer.

Cas dropped his head with a blush, "Um-"

"Alright Cas is out."

"Wait," Gabe stopped him with a hand and smirked in his brother's direction. "I think you're misinterpreting Cassie's hesitation."

All turned to Cas and under the spotlight he stuttered, "I have…I understand…participation and… masturbation due to-"

"Whatever," Dean cut him off as he sank into his chair, tightly crossing his legs. "So winner gets what?"

Gabe snapped and pointed in victory.  "The best sex of his life."

"You can't guarantee that." Dean shook his head.

Sam shrugged.  "How about just making the other three do whatever he wants?"

Gabe leaned over and elbowed Sam.  "Getting into it Sammy?"

"Well I'm not getting out of it."

"That's the spirit!" Gabe patted him harshly on the back.

"How will we know if anyone is cheating?" Dean asked, eyeing them all skeptically.

"I can tell," Gabe nodded enthusiastically.

"Who's gonna read you?"

"I'm an angel. I don't lie."

"Please."

"Scouts honor."

"Bullshit."

"Cassie could tell," Gabe nodded at him but he still looked very confused and tomato red. "He knows what every one of us look like after the act."

Dean coughed uncomfortably and turned back to Cas, "You could tell when I…we…whenever we…um-"

"It's true."

"That's information I didn't need," Sam groaned.

Dean thrust out his hand through the awkward silence. "Shake?"

"I'm not touching those hands," Gabe shied away and swept his hand over the table, bringing four beers in with his angel mojo. "Alright boys, let's see who is master of their domain." He lifted his beer to the air for a toast that all joined. "The game begins!"


	2. Day 1- Gabe Cheats

A week with no jollys? Easy as pie.

Not as awesome as pie, but Dean's been in harder situations.

Or maybe not.

A half hour after their celebratory beers and halfway into an episode of _Angel,_ Dean stomped into the main room and started yelling, "Gabriel, you son of a bitch!"

"What?" Gabe knowingly smirked from the same position Dean left him, a handheld videogame the only addition and the center of the angel's attention.

"Don't play smart. You spiked our beers!" Dean pointed down to his waist where the evidence of this was indeed quite evident. The coarse fabric of his jeans hugged him tight enough to show the erection pushing painfully hard against the seams.

Seriously, it literally came out of nowhere. Charisma was hot but it was her prego episode and _no thank you_ to that. It wasn't a far leap before concluding Gabe's part in his surprise boner.

He hoped to god that he would never use ' _Gabe_ ' and ' _surprise boner_ ' in the same sentence ever again.

Gabe took his time leering over his Nintendo, making it clear that he enjoyed Dean's little display, pissing the hunter off more.

Well, it wasn't a _little_ display. Dean's display was quite big.

Gabe chuckled and shrugged, "It's a small dose. I spiked mine too. See-" Gabe suddenly stood and thrust his hips forward, showing everyone in the room how his dick pushed against his jeans as well. "All's fair."

"So it's not just me?!" Sam stood up quickly but sat down just as fast when he realized he was sporting a pair of sweatpants that were much more show than tell. He curled the book on the table over his lap as his face turned a bright shade of beet red.

His cheeks almost turned purple when he looked up and saw the very erect Gabe sending him his very own wink. "Sporting a winner there, aren't you Sammy?"

How could someone blush that much and still sustain a hard on?

Oh, right. Viagra.

"Gross," Dean complained. "And that's cheating."

"Is not."

"Cas!" Dean called over his shoulder and waited until the guy quietly shuffled into the room.

Dean was glaring at him to hurry up on the outside, but on the inside he was trying to hold in a laugh. Cas had his trench coat wrapped tightly around his entire body like some weird human burrito. His hands held the fabric close to his side, one arm hidden to make sure it wouldn't move, the other bending awkwardly to hide his groin. He was trying so hard to look like he wasn't doing anything strange, as if he always stood like that.

Well…he kinda did.

Dean coughed, "We need a ruling. Gabe cheated."

"We never set any rules," Cas said, shifting awkwardly in place as he readjusted his outerwear.

"Exactly!" Gabe had no issue with raising both hands in the air, giving them all another glimpse of his pitched tent.

"That is true Dean," Sam reluctantly agreed but he was distracted as he said it. Gabe wouldn't stop wiggling his hips.

"I hate all of you," Dean groaned and pulled at the band of his jeans again. If he could burn the image long enough of seeing both big and little Sam standing tall in sweatpants, he would go fish out a pair for himself.

"Dean?" Cas' pained gasp had him nearly flipping a chair over he spun so fast.

"What Cas?"

"What is happening?" Dean gulped as Cas shifted again, his wrist pressing down on the area Dean guessed to be rather sensitive. Cas grunted at his own touch and shifted again. "It is not going away."

"It's not going to," Dean said with pity and suppressed hilarity before angrily spinning towards the angel in the room. "Gabe drugged us."

Cas whined aloud again and Sam sighed, "Guys this isn't fair to Cas. He's a thousands of years old virgin. Take it off him."

"Would if I could," Gabe smiled mischievously before flopping back down in the chair next to Sam and flipping his game back on.

"And you can," Sam reminded him.

"Dean?" Cas called again.

Dean groaned, "What do you want me to do?"

"It hurts."

"No it doesn't, you big baby. Just stop twitching so much," Dean urged him even though he found himself hypocritically twitching in his spot, grinding his chair across the ground. Cas' little dance was making him hotter than Mexico under the summer sun. Stupid Gabriel and his stupid drugs making him turned on by stupid human burritos. "Try and take your mind off it."

"How?"

"I don't know," Dean snapped the same time his chair did, tossing him straight to the floor as thanks for his frustrated convulsing. He grunted at the pain of smacking his ass on wood mixed with the sudden strange arousal that the shift of his own wood suddenly sent pulsing through him.

He glared at Gabe and Sam and dared them to say anything with his bitchiest bitch face. They didn't, but Gabe whispered something to Sam and it was apparently the funniest fucking thing in the entire goddamn world.

"Dean," Cas whined again.

Dean growled and threw up his hands, "I don't know! Think about something gross. Or random. Like bees. You like bees right?"

Cas barely blinked before he complained, "It's not working."

"Well Cassie," Gabe winked. "You can always take care of it. Relieve the pressure."

"Is that an insinuation?"

The douchebag gave him a round of applause, "Very good Cassie!"

"You could do that," Sam nodded. "But you would lose the bet."

"I don't care," Cas growled and pulled the trench coat tighter around his side as he stomped his feet. "It is quite uncomfortable."

"Then have at it," Sam stifled a chuckle as he gestured towards the hall leading to Cas' room.

"Only a few hours." Gabe shook his head, "Humans."

"You know what Cas?" Dean glared at Gabe and shook his head, finally getting up from the ground. "No. You'll be fine. You're not losing so soon."

"But Dean-"

"Come. Sit." Cas longingly looked towards his bedroom door but dejectedly walked to the chair next to Dean all the same, still wrapping his blanket of a trench coat tightly around his sides. "There you go."

Dean smiled in a small victory for Team Human but soon questioned his alliances. Cas would not stop twitching! Dean was afraid his chair was going to break too pretty soon. Then came more complaining out loud and it was just really sad.

The worst part of it was that Dean had to hear every wanton little whine that pipsqueak made. Every single raspy breath he took was tugging at Dean's drug induced erection, teasing him and asking him to come out and play. He ground his toes into his shoes and turned his knuckles white gripping his chair but nothing was blocking Cas out.

Then Sam cut in with the most pitiful puppy dog look of all, "Cas, buddy. If you really need to-"

"No," Dean cut him off but after two more minutes of silent torture he just caved, "Fine. Whatever. Go ahead, Cas."

Gabe chuckled the same time Cas thanked him with desperate relief.

Cas turned towards the hall and Dean suddenly found the ability to breath normally again but, of course, Cas had to just go and turn right back around, looking just as confused and adorable as ever. Wait…no, not adorable. The flip of his hair, the sheen of sweat on his forehead, the frustration in his brows, all mixed with the way he bit his lip in complete erotic confusion and desperation…not adorable. It was mouthwatering and immoral. Oh, hell yes it was immoral. It was downright dirty.

Shit. His new chair was starting to creak.

What Cas said next just made it so much worse. "How do I… I understand the practice but how… what do I…"

"I thought you said you knew how!" Sammy practically laughed and it must have been funny from his point of view. Dean was too preoccupied trying to think about the deer.

The dead, dead deer.

"Watching and doing just aren't the same thing," Gabe sympathized. "Oh you're gonna have so much fun little bro!"

Sam kicked his chair, "Creepy."

"I feel proud," Gabe shrugged. "Little Cassie's growing up."

"Dean?" Cas called his name again and dammit, dead Bambi was not distracting enough.

"Jesus Christ, Cas." Dean huffed and flailed his arms. "Just…do it." As Cas started to unravel his coat, Dean jumped and added, "Not here! Go to your room and do it."

"Do what?"

"Dean, you gotta help him out," Sam shook his head and gestured from behind the safety of his table. "Look at him."

"Yeah Dean, look at him." Gabe chuckled again and winked in Cas' direction. "I think he needs a helping hand."

"You're just trying to make me lose," Dean accused.

"He's the one jerking off, not you. Unless you think you can't handle yourself?"

Dean's foot tapped and his mouth moved but all he could do in the end was frown, "Fine. Come on, Cas. Let's go."

"Thank you."

"Thank me…actually never thank me."

Dean led the way to Cas' room, the entire time bitching in his head about stupid angels, stupid Gabriel, and stupid Sam for suggesting Dean help him. Why was it always Dean's job? Then again, the thought of Sam helping Cas with this sort of thing caused bile to rise to his throat.

Nope. He could do this. No problemo muchacho.

Cas' room was a lot like Dean's only bare. There wasn't a mess to be had as Cas had no real personal objects just yet. Even as Cas walked into the room Dean could see the trench coat open just the slightest bit to reveal one of his borrowed t-shirts and borrowed…oh, holy Jesus. Cas was wearing his pants and they were barely containing that erection, pushing so tight across the zipper that Dean swore he saw the color of Cas' boxers. His boxers. Oh, fuck. Cas' dick was pressing up against his navy blue boxer briefs. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

Dean cleared his throat and lifted his gaze to find a head-tilting Cas quizzically staring at him with that pained aroused expression. Triple fuck again.

"You've really never…?"

Cas shook his head and explained, "I understand the mechanics from observing but I've never tried. As an angel, I found I had other interests. Besides, I cannot recall my memories with perfect clarity anymore. Only recent events."

Dean nodded awkwardly, hoping to skip over that uncomfortable conversation and dip into an extremely uncomfortable situation instead. "Alright go lay on the bed, take your pants off, and uh- go to town."

"To what town? We are stuck here, remember? Gabriel-"

"No, not- okay look. This isn't a thing, a normal thing. People don't do things like this- like- ugh- like- like _this,_ unless they are very…close. Or drunk."

"I thought we were close?" Dean huffed but Cas cut him off before he could try to explain again, "Dean it is very bothersome. Can you please just show me? Please."

Fuck, Cas' voice cracked with that plea and goddammit, there was no refusing that tone.

"I'm not going to show you anything. I'm going to tell you. Walk you through it. I'll be right here if you need me. Okay?" Cas nodded urgently and Dean gestured towards the bed. "So, take off your clothes and lay down."

Cas finally unraveled the outer layer of his outfit, dropping his coat and gently hanging it up in his closet. Dean was about to tell him it didn't matter but then he jumped for his shirt and the jerk of Dean's interested dick reminded him that this was not supposed to be a strip tease. "Oh, whoa. Hold on there. Go by the bed and strip. And uh- Wait till I turn around."

It was a painfully long time before Cas was done -probably folding his socks. When he finally finished he called out from the bed, "What now?"

"Just, get comfortable." God knows Dean never would. He leaned against Cas' dresser and stared into his closet, closing his eyes as he heard the bed squeak and the naked Cas adjust behind him.

"Okay."

"You got lube or lotion or-"

"I have this lotion. Sam said to use it after showers because-"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, that's fine. Just- um- put some on your hand." The pump of the bottle made Dean jump as he imagined Cas squeezing it out into his cupped hand, readying it to slick up his thick, hard, throb- "You wanna- um-" Dean grabbed the air with his fist as he tried to mentally prepare himself for the words to escape his mouth. "You wanna grab yourself."

"Grab myself where?"

"Where? Where do you- Where it hurts Cas. Just wrap your-" Dean sucked in the rest of that sentence at the whine that came out of Cas' mouth, penetrating the silent air with the cry of a virgin. "Oh fuck."

"Bad?" Cas actually sounded concerned.

"N-no." Dean swallowed and pushed on. He could do this. "Wrap your hand around yourself and uh- spread the lotion around."

Lucifer was back and he was playing tricks on Dean because goddamn it all to hell that could not be the sound of lotion sliding all over Cas' dick and he was not making those godforsaken sounds. The bed was squeaking as his body shifted and Dean had to bite his lip in order to prevent telling him to stop moving.

"O-okay," Cas squeaked when the bed stopped shaking.

"Hold yourself tight." Dean just couldn't stop doing the hand gestures to match, hoping Cas was staring at him so he would see.

Oh hell, was Cas looking at him? With his cock in his hand? Really? Oh fucking fuck.

Dean started to jerk his hand and pictured Cas doing the same. He would be so nervous staring down at himself. Had Cas ever really looked before? He probably had. He would be so curious about the stiffening in his pants and he would love to inspect every inch of himself for hours, poking and prodding and fingering. Such a great being reduced to a quivering mess as he innocently strokes, desperate for orders that he only asked for from Dean.

He would jerk at the cold of the lotion, arch his back and hiss, but sink down when it heated up on his skin. He would fumble when his other hand brushes the inside of his thighs and slides against his balls and probably think he did something wrong, look around to see if anyone saw, and then do it again.

He would lurch at the rush and grip a little tighter, pulling that loud moan out of his mouth. He would twist his hand just the slightest, drag his thumb over the curious, throbbing vein, and watch as he started to fall apart.

It would be so new, so overwhelming. He would cry and pant and moan as he tries to beg for orders. He would start to rock as he climbs higher and builds until his body can't take it. His hips would shake-

Dean had to shake his head to clear that image from his mind. His cock decided to repay him with an extra harsh and painful jolt. Worst timing for a cock tease Cas fantasy ever.

"And-" Dean squeaked before dropping his voice back to normal. "And move your hand up and down. Like uh- like I'm doing."

The provocative noises that filled the room had Dean whining behind clamped lips. The lotion suctioned against Cas' hand and the smacks of each popping pass were only the tip of the inappropriate erection iceberg.

Cas was going slow but the bed was still shifting as his body swayed with his arm, rocking back and forth as his hips started to pick up the instinct. Every whack of the bed against the wall pulled at Dean's will just a little bit more and added a new layer to the agonizing anticipation thrumming from his center. On top of that, Cas was muttering again. It was obviously that he was trying to be silent but Dean could still hear the tiny whimpers and moans that sounded behind him.

Dean moaned in his own time, glaring down at his fully erect dick, hating Gabriel more than ever since it would not go down. It seemed to only be getting worse –tighter, firmer- as the noises continued and his jeans were near suffocating. His cock was going to burst in its cage. Stupid Viagra.

His cock was just screaming to be touched and he was not going to lose this stupid bet so he tried to relive just the tiniest bit of pressure by slipping a hand in his pocket and over his boxers, pressing down just the slightest. A jolt of energy flushed his system and oh god yeah, that's what-

"Dean-" Cas gasped behind him.

Dean literally jumped, his hips thrust up into his hand, and he had to grip the dresser to keep himself upright on his buckling knees. That was his name. The most indecent pronunciation of his name, but his name all the same. And it sounded perfect coming from those distraught lips.

"C-C-Cas?" Dean gasped and ripped his hand straight out of his pocket like his dick was on fire – and it was-, afraid he would come from just that simple touch. It was enough to set his system into overload just hearing Cas moan his fucking name, let alone to say his back. God, he was so screwed.

"Dean I- unngh-"

"Are you hurt?"

"No. No. It feels- it feels-"

The room was getting hotter. Dean pulled at the collar of his shirt. It couldn't physically be this muggy. Gabe must have screwed with the thermostat.

Dean tried to pull in a breath from the thick air, but his voice came out in a pant, "Feels good Cas?"

"Yeah. Mhmm." Cas mulled over the groan and Dean suddenly found himself dizzy and dug his fists into the wood of the dresser with both hands. "Yeah De-Dean. Feels- feels- mmm- yeah-"

"Oh god. Okay. Move your hand faster and hold yourself tighter. Move over everything. Head and uh- god just- over everything."

Cas was breathing so loud and the bed wouldn't stop squeaking and Dean's hands were digging into the side of the dresser so hard, taking all of his weight, he was sure he would break it somehow.

Dean couldn't take it anymore. There was a buzz traveling everywhere, making him antsy like he couldn't believe. Every pulse of blood that pumped more drugs straight to his hyperaware cock made his body convulse. His hands started to slip on the wood and he tried to readjust himself without moving too much. The friction was nonexistent and the pressure was too constricting. And to know there was nothing he could do about it? That it was only day one? Day fucking one?!

Why was it so fucking hot?!

He closed his eyes tight but that only brought new images to tag onto the sounds he was hearing. Of turning around, straddling Cas, unzipping his jeans, and showing him what else Team Human could do. Maybe it would be good for him. To shut him up. To have something in his mouth. Screw the contest. He would be able to handle it. Cas would swallow him down with those big pink lips of his and Dean would talk him through it. Cas would lick him to the brink but he wouldn't come because he could control himself and oh god. Fuck his fucking jeans for hurting so damn much.

Dean was tempted to peek over his shoulder but remembered the golden rule of telling and not watching and focused on the dark of the closet. There was another of Dean's shirts hanging up in there, brushing up against the trench coat. Cas had been wearing his shirt and it had been touching

him all day. Why did his clothes get to touch him and why were his jeans so fucking tight?!

Screw it.

He jumped for his button with one hand and popped it, unzipping in one swift move and relieving the pressure. Oh god that felt good. No, wait. No. Now there was practically nothing touching him and his cock was bouncing in the air and, fuck the world, he wanted it to be touching something. It was just a thin layer of boxer barely grazing him and Cas had been wearing his boxers. Cas' dick was almost popping out of his boxers. The soft pink head which was beating in Cas hand right now. Oh god, couldn't he hurry up? Didn't virgins blow their load quicker than this?

"Cas-" Dean breathed his name pleadingly.

"D-Dean," Cas groaned and the bed started to shift more, the squeaking coming faster.

Dean could just jump over there and make the bed break if he wanted. He could jump on Cas and show him what real torture was. He could make him so hard that he would do more than just beg for it. He would have him reeling harder than any drug. He would give him a show like he'd never known and have him screaming.

"Dean-" Cas was already begging for it.

"Cas." Dean cock jumped again and he pushed his palm over it, just to keep it in place. There was a flash of heat that spread through him and he fell into the dresser again, crying out as the rush of pleasure overtook him and his judgment. "Fuck."

"Dean. Oh, Dean." Cas was really desperate out now, the bed was pumping against the wall like Cas' cock was pumping into his hand. "It's not- I can't-"

The poor kid was practically crying and that just buckled Dean's knees more. He wanted to face him, watch him, to see what he could do and how wrecked he could make him. Instead, he turned to the wall and pressed his body against it, giving his cock just a bit more pressure as he brokenly instructed, "Yes you can. Just relax. Think of something that turns you on."

"On?" The squeaking slowed. "I'm not a machine. I don't have a button that functions as-"

"No," Dean knocked his head against the sheetrock. "Picture someone that makes you feel all hot and bothered. Like a celebrity or whatever. Picture someone you like doing to you what you're doing now. Imagine it's them touching you."

"Someone I like?"

"Yeah," Dean gulped. "Anyone. Just-"

"Deannn-"

"It's okay. I'm here. You just relax your stomach and-"

"D-D-Deaaaannnn."

Dean started to thump his head against the wall as his hips started to jerk with the shallow intakes of his breath.

I – _thump_ – will not – _thump_ – hump – _thump_ – the wall – _thump_ –

I – _thump_ – will not – _thump_ – hump – _thump_ – the wall – _thump_ -

"Oh-oh-oh- I- - I- Oh- oh my- Dean- Dean- Dean! I need you- I need- I need-"

Cas needed him.

Screw it. Again.

Dean tilted his bruised head just the slightest bit and finally saw Cas. He was jerking his hand with lightning speed, his other so wound up in the sheets that the bed was falling apart beneath him. He was arching off the mattress and squeezing his taught legs tighter as he bucked into his fist, every thrust causing the bed to shake. His skin was shaded pink and his body was beyond tense with anticipation. His face was twisted in a frustrated grimace so hard he didn't even see Dean looking at him.

"Oh fuck. Fuck, Cas." Dean pressed harder into the wall just enough to gasp and relieve some of the new excitement that flared through him.

Shit. He was humping the wall.

"Cas, fuck."

"Dean-" He looked completely wrecked, so destroyed.

"You want to come?" Dean licked his lips as he watched Cas nod, his hand pulling tighter on the sheets below him. "Cas? What do you need?" An evil smirk crawled up his face as he listened to another strangled growl come from behind Cas' lips. The teasing gave him a sick thrill, a sense of undeserved revenge. Well, it was Cas' fault for looking so delectable. "Do you want to come?"

"Yes, Dean. Please- oh, Dean. Dean, please."

Screw it. Screw him. No wait, don't screw him. Just- ah fuck.

Who even cares? He pushed away from the wall, replacing the pressure with his resting palm, and stepped to Cas, his shins pressing the side of the bed so he could get a better view.

"Lay back on the bed-"

Cas jumped at his voice suddenly so close and pleaded in the pause, "But Dean-"

"Lay back on the bed." Cas struggled to let himself go and push back onto the tangled covers below. In his messy movements, his cock bounced against his stomach and splashed a drip of precum on his abdomen –just a tiny sample, a tiny taste.

Dean licked his lips as he watched Cas quickly grab himself again,

It was just as he imagined.

No, it was better.

Cas' cock was thick –Cas' hand could barely contain that girth-, a deep shade of pleading pink, and throbbing with need against the inside of his palm. Dean had to wonder how long Cas would last if he wrapped his lips around his head. Could he even fit Cas in his mouth? It would just take one lick. One lick and Cas would be shooting off inside him, coating his tongue and crying his name. Dean could do it. He could handle himself. He could do it and refuse his body's need to come the same time as Cas.

Before Dean had a chance to test that theory, Cas was tugging his fingers over his glossy member and doing just what Dean said, covering every single inch.

"Good," Dean cooed. "Now twist your wrist as you go up."

"D-Dean-"

"You're doing good, Cas." Dean wanted to reach out and pet him, run his nails down his inner thigh, and pull him close so he had something to rut against other than the palm of his hand –but he didn't. He just watched as Cas stared up at him with an open, panting mouth and hooded, dark eyes. "Just relax and go just a bit faster. Don't try to push yourself."

"Dean- please-"

"Relax and- Fuck." Cas moaned too loud that time. There was no way they couldn't hear him out there. There was no way to escape it in the room. "Fucking just come Cas," Dean was pretty sure his lip was bleeding he was biting so hard. He could barely catch a shallow breath as the words escaped him, "Oh fuck. Such a fucking mess. Perfect. Fuck. Cas just, mmm, let me see you. Let me see you come. Let me hear you come for the first time. Uh fuck, first time."

Cas' eyes met his again and that was it for Cas. His body contorted with the intense vibrations and hot streams of cum shot over him and the bed, most landing on his chest and some on his face. Dean whimpered at the sight and pressed even harder on his begging cock, willing it to keep in line as he forced himself to remember what was at stake. He was not going to let Gabe win and he was not going to lose. Right?

He spun around quick and tried to catch his breath as he heard Cas do the same.

"Oh no," Cas mumbled tiredly behind him.

"What? What's wrong?"" Dean started to panic and doubled checked himself. There was a thin line of cum sprayed across his boxers…did he cum too? The fully standing, near bursting erection said otherwise.

"Your shirt I-"

"What?"

"I um-"

Dean spun around – he already watched the guy whack off, wasn't much else to see- and sighed when he saw Cas fiddling with the shirt he had worn that day, picking it up and showing another stream of cum crossing over the design.

"Oh." That was fine except Cas was trying to clean it up by pulling his fingers through the mess and gathering it in his hand. Then he went to touch his face where some was dripping and- "Oh god. Fuck. Okay. Um-"

"You don't look well Dean."

"I um- that's fine just um- put that down and – um- I'm going to go take a shower."

"Dean?"

"Just um- sleep." Dean started haphazardly buttoning the jeans that did not want to be buttoned and tripped back towards the door. His hands kept slipping in the cum that rubbed past the fabric of his boxers and into the small gap that showed skin. He could feel Cas on him, rubbing over his flesh and soaking into his skin. He needed to get out of there. "You're tired right? Just sleep till the drugs wear off."

"Thank you, Dean."

"Sure, whatever, and uh-" Dean stopped for a moment. This was Cas' first time after all and he was new to being human so Dean had a responsibility or something. "You know you can do that whenever you want. I mean in your room. In private. Um- find out what you like and-" Cas nodded and the cum on his face shone in the light. "Ah fuck Jesus- I'll see you later-"

Dean bolted to the nearest bathroom and locked himself in. He ran to the showerhead and turned it on the coldest setting, jumping straight in with all his clothes. He moved so the water sprayed directly against the cock bouncing against his chest and he cursed so many times, he wasn't sure he said one proper word. At least Cas' cum was off his dick. Oh fuck.

Dean' pulled himself from the shower and peeled off his wet clothes, changing into sweats since his body decided to calm. Thank god Gabe only gave them a small dose.

Gabe and Sam were waiting outside his room with great big school-girl smirks and he groaned because he was far too wound up to deal with them.

"Cassie out?" Gabe danced.

"And did you-" Sam gestured. "Are you still, what did you guys say, master of your domain?"

"Oh, I am master of my entire domain." Dean nodded and cross his arms. "My domain is my bitch."

"Why's your hair wet?" Sam went to touch him.

"Shut up," Dean growled and avoided him with a slap. "Bitch."

"Jerk."

Gabe wiggled his brows at them both. "And then there were three."


	3. Day 2- Sammy's Dreaming

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow. I got a lot more feedback to this than I thought I would. Thank you guys and I hope you continue to enjoy it! I have "plot" lined out but since this is for fun, let me know if there's something you want and I may be able to wiggle it in ;)

There were hands everywhere.

The muscles in Sam's back melted like butter as fingers pressed and rolled, driving deep and pushing him into the table, manipulating him into relaxation

Massages were the best. He never got them because he was always with Dean and Dean would always go on about how ' _that's so girly_ ' or ' _wow Samantha, gonna get your nails done too?_ ' or something about ' _only worth it if there's a happy ending_ ' with a filthy wink added on –as if he wouldn't understand the implication. Plus, they were hardly spa people so a real massage was a real treat.

The person whose fingers were oiling him up in unadulterated bliss spoke in a thick Swedish accent, just loud enough to be heard over the relaxing sounds of babbling brooks and chimes, "Is there anywhere you would like me to concentrate?"

"Yeah," Sam groaned as the hands pressed over his shoulder blades. "Lower."

"Oh, Sam," the accent suddenly dropped and that voice sounded painfully familiar. "I never thought you'd ask."

"Gabriel-" Sam flipped around and glared at the angel innocently holding up his hands and smirking like the devil. Sam followed the direction of that smirk and jumped.

It was a full body massage. Full body massages required much less clothing than they did skin.

Quickly, he tried to tighten the small towel hiding his groin in order to cover _some_ of his completely nude body but it was pitifully small. The lady at the front desk said they didn't have any bigger and he would have to... Wait a second. What was Gabriel doing as a masseur? Where were they? Last thing he knew, they had been in the bunker laughing at Dean and then they went to- "I'm dreaming, aren't I?"

"You always were quick on the draw kiddo." Gabe winked. "The brainy genes and the looks. Poor Dean." He wrinkled his nose and picked up the incense burning across the room. "Lavender and sage? Are you warding off ghosts from hairy backs past?"

"Why are you here?"

Every time he shifted he needed to pull the towel back on and he couldn't find a comfortable way to sit while 95% of him was exposed -making it an endless squirming process. Large men needed larger things but apparently his mind didn't account for that. He suddenly had the feeling that the girl at the front desk was lying. And that she was less a girl than a shape shifting jackass. "Couldn't this wait until I woke up?"

"Nope." Gabe snapped his fingers and the formerly empty spa room suddenly filled with women -all in their 20s, all fit, and all wearing almost nothing. Each one had both their hands on his torso and pushed him back into the table, rubbing their many fingers over what they could reach -as if there was some secret prize they were all searching for.

It was like being molested by a greedy octopus.

"Gabriel-"

"No?" Gabe snapped again and all the girls turned to men -all in their 20s, all fit, and all wearing almost nothing. "You are just full of surprises."

"Stop it," Sam said but his heart wasn't really in it. Those hands were pressing on aches he didn't even know he had! Palms were petting this heat that slowly rose from somewhere inside and he sighed when a dream dude started working knuckles into his shoulder. X marked the spot and he was really digging for it.

His sigh was soon followed by a gasp when he felt one of the many hands slipping over his belly button- and only trailing lower. "Get them out of here!"

"Just me?" Gabe gasped dramatically and snapped again, making the men disappear, leaving his body painfully void of touch. "Well butter my biscuit."

"I'm not buttering your anything," Sam grumbled and adjusted the towel again. It had to be getting smaller. It was quite literally a washcloth now. And his clothes were nowhere to be seen. Of course. He could feel himself start to flush with embarrassment as he experimented with different crossings of the legs. "What do you want?"

"It's not about me Sammy. Oh, no. It's about you. And what you want." Gabe wiggled his brows and Sam slammed back into the table with a yelp as large invisible hands pushed and pinned him down. He was bound to get a concussion or at least whiplash at this rate.

Gabe skipped to his side and started dancing around the small room as he spoke to the lavender and sage filled air. "So what does Sam Winchester want? What gets that monster truck motor running? Monster cock more like it. You wouldn't have that thing on steroids, would you?"

"So that's what this is about?" He gave a high-pitched laugh as he wiggled under the invisible weight. It wasn't budging and his fidgeting was only moving his puny little washcloth. The only thing he was able to do was move his hands down and cover the bits that mattered with cupped palms. Clearly he was playing defense for now. "The contest? It's only been one day. Are you really having that much trouble already? Cas just lost."

Gabe scoffed, giving a raspberry to the sky. "Please. Cas was easy. Far too easy. Kind of a floozy really."

"A floozy?"

"You, Sammy dearest-" Gabe annoyingly tapped his forehead as he made a pass around, "-are not. You are a six and a half foot wall of non-jumpable self-control. Dean'll flop like yesterday's lettuce. He needs to hit it and quit it at least once a day. And after the show Cassie gave him, well…I'll be surprised if he makes it to breakfast. You? Do you even remember the last time you got your freak on?"

Sam raised his brows and continued to wiggle, getting nowhere. "I ' _get my freak on_ ' just enough, thanks. Now will you let me up?"

Gabe's smirk came into focus as he excitedly leaned over him. "Not until you tell me."

"Why bother anyway? This is just a dream."

"I'm glad to hear you say that." Sam felt the dread sink in as Gabe excitedly patted his shoulder. Gabe was far too happy for him to have said something right. "Dreams don't count do they? Deany boy said so himself."

"Well…they might."

"Oh, no. You said it. This is just a dream." Gabe pinched his cheek, earning a menacing growl, but he was quickly out of reach, dancing and twirling around the room again. "Anyone in the world. If you could have anyone, who would it be?"

"It's not going to work." He already knew struggling wasn't working, why was he still trying it? All he could do was continue to protect his precious jewels from Gabe's greedy gaze and glare at him as he continued to spin like a ballerina. "You won't get anything from me."

The jumps suddenly stopped and Sam's heart thudded in his chest when he saw the look on his face. He expected Gabe to be teasing and taunting in his bubbly nature but it was clear he took it as a challenge and was now a man on a mission. His heated gaze swept over Sam's immobile body and his smirk dropped to a frown of concentration. The rush that spread anywhere he looked ended Sam's squirming and he was pinned by more than just the angel's mojo.

Gabriel seemed to notice and walked forward with purpose, locked onto Sam's wide eyes and whispered, "Watch me." He slowly rounded he table and dragged his fingers along the outside, just far enough away not to touch Sam's body but close enough for Sam to feel the indents he made in the cushion and to involuntarily curve towards the dips. "So what's your secret kink? There was that whole demon phase. A little rough around the edges. Perhaps some bondage and knife play? No? Over that? Hmm. You've had your fun there. Maybe a little more vanilla for you. Romance under the moonlight? Making love on the beach?"

Gabe snapped and Sam was no longer staring up at the blank white ceiling of an office building. It inverted into a black sky with many shining stars dotting around a bold moon, far too big to be realistic. Somewhere behind him came the crash of waves and when he strained his neck he could see the pink sands of a tropical beach.

"Stop that."

"I'm getting closer aren't I?" When Gabe popped up this time he was shirtless, clad in only a pair of Hawaiian flower print shorts and a lei necklace. Sam caught himself inspecting the way the petals fell against the curves of his chest, wondering how smooth they were sliding against his nipples, and forced himself to look back at the big bright moon overhead.

This was all so ridiculous. Just like this contest. It was making him think about sex and that was what was making him think about Gabriel's nipples…not that he associated the two in any way. Normally.

"You might as well give in," Gabe sang. "This won't stop till you do."

The angel snapped again and the table disappeared beneath him with a crack. While frantically inspecting for broken bones, he realized he had changed clothes and was now dressed in the same outfit as Gabe, with the addition of an undone white button up. He was still pinned but he was now stuck on a giant purple beach blanket next to a small picnic basket with a bottle of wine poking out the top.

Gabe clapped twice and new music started to play in the distance, the sound of steel drums and acoustic guitar. He rolled his hips to the hula-dancing tune and continued, "Alright Fabio. You're on the beach. You got wine and music and stars. What more do you need?"

The dance continued and Sam found himself wondering why Gabe felt the need to dance so much and how he could move his hips like that. Maybe it had something to do with the short height. Smaller people could always seem to really gyrate when they wanted to. And that thought was leading nowhere good so he looked back to the moon again.

Gabe smirked at him and started to roll his hips down low, bending his knees and sinking to get near his level. Sam had to lean away to keep that leg from hitting his head. There was nowhere to look anymore, that was for sure. His eyes kept flickering to the inseam trailing to Gabe's middle and back to a freckle really close to his nose. Angel's had freckles?

Gabe snickered and rolled his body up and down, making it as suggestive as the imagination could handle. "Maybe you want to be the one taken care of. Is that it Sammy? Do you want someone to lay you down and ride you into oblivion?"

Sam grunted when Gabe suddenly jumped on top of him, straddled his hips, and pushed down on his exposed chest with his actual hands in addition to his invisible ones. Sam tried to wiggle him off but soon realized how bad an idea that was. He had been too busy focusing on the flow of Gabe's body to realize where his blood flowed and how interested he had really become.

Gabe's dirty words mixed with the image of those moves and it really messed with his head. Both of them. With Gabe's legs opening above him, he could suddenly picture in perfect clarity Gabe being the one to lay him down and -as he said- ride him into oblivion. As his hips fumbled under the weight, he realized his problem was only growing.

"Would you let me go?"

Gabe smirked and dug nails into skin, dragging them over his pecks and dipping them into his stomach. "Your dream. All you have to do is want it and it's yours."

"Not really." Sam gave one last toss and felt the magic hands disappear, but he was still held down by Gabe's literal weight. "You're still here."

"Words hurt you know." Just as Sam was going to tell him to cry about it somewhere else, Gabe waved his hand and duct tape covered his mouth and stuck it shut. As he struggled to rip it off without removing his lips, Gabe continued to ponder out loud. "So who do you want riding you?" Gabe's image shifted into every star he named, "Scarlett Johansson? Jennifer Love Hewitt? Channing Tatum?"

"No, just-" Sam held out his hands and almost pushed Gabe off but he didn't really want to touch him too much when he was already having issues with his southern region. Plus, Channing Tatum was big. Very big. "Will you get off?"

"Get off on you?!" Gabe changed back into himself with a smile challenging the size of the moon. "Why, I never knew!"

Gabe gasped and rolled his hips down, sinking his weight onto Sam's erection and eliciting an unwanted groan. Then he shrugged, "That's a lie. I did." He tapped Sam's head. "Mind reading and all that jazz. In fact yesterday-" Gabe ducked down and leaned his mouth against Sam's ear, dropping his voice to a whisper, "-you were wondering why I used Viagra on you. That's right. I know what you were thinking. That all I had to do was bend over and you'd be hard as a rock, imagining how slow you could slip inside. Wondering if I could take all of you. If I would swallow you up like the greedy tramp you know I can be. Why couldn't Dean and Cas just leave so you could bend me over the table and see?

"Then again-" He switched ears, leaving a trail of hot breath over his jaw. "-you want to win. This bet is just a pathetic, macho, cowboy pissing contest but you want to take the prize just to make us do what you want. Cas and Dean would be easy. But what would you make Gabe do? What would have me bending over the most? That is your favorite thing to see. Maybe make me wear a pair of cutoff shorts and hold a lasso -cowboys were already on your mind. Make me ride you and see if I could tame your cock like a mighty steed. All with one good fuck." Sam gasped when Gabe's teeth latched onto his lobe and his tongue flicked over the sensitive scrapes. "Sound about right?"

Sam grunted, refusing to answer. He dug his fingers into the blanket and clawed at the sand underneath as he fought the urge to push his member into Gabe's back so he could see if what he thought was true. To see if Gabe could actually take him. Cowboy boots and all. Because, yes, that was exactly what he was thinking.

"Wanna know what I was thinking?"

Sam could hear the gulp leave his throat and Gabe was suddenly blocking his staring contest with the moon overhead, gawking at him with big lustful eyes and a small smile just barely pulling on his mouth.

"I was wondering, how far down my throat could I get a cock that long. I mean, the lack of gag reflex is an angel bonus but that thing is quite the gobstopper. Do you want to see me try?"

Mmmm yes. He really, really did. But-

He meant to say no but it came out in a strangled whine. Gabe was running his fingers over his chest and flicking his nails across the shirt touching him, pushing it off bit by bit until it fell all the way open. He wasn't even looking at Sam anymore. Just focusing on his fingers running faint pink lines over the newly exposed skin and trailing them back to the band of his shorts.

Sam shook his head, "You need to-"

"I need to?" Gabe smirked and started to flip the pant button open. "Never realized you were that urgent."

"Gabriel-" Sam yelped when he heard the zip slowly pulling open. He couldn't see with Gabe in the way but he could feel his erection pushing against the tangs. Apparently Gabe had him going commando. "Gabe, you can't just-"

"Love it when you call me that."

"You can't just come into my dream and read my mind and- and-" He hoped he didn't look as flustered as he felt, "-and violate me."

"It's hardly violation when you're begging for it."

"I am not begging for it."

"Out loud."

"Stop that." His brain finally unstuck and he threw his hands at Gabe's wrists and pulled them away from his crotch. "No more reading my mind. You got it?"

"Then you'll just have to tell me."

Gabe started running his nails across Sam's wrists and rolled his hips against the part of the erection that had sprung free. The rough pressure against shorts and metal wasn't exactly pleasurable but that didn't stop Sam from rolling up to meet him, if only by a few centimeters.

"Tell me where you want my mouth." Gabe leaned down, bringing Sam's hold with him. "Here?" he pressed his warm, breathy lips to Sam's ear. "Here-" to under his jaw. "Here-" to the corner of his mouth. "Here-" he pressed them against Sam's lips and snagged them with his teeth when Sam gasped at his hips boring down again.

Gabe flipped their hands and pinned him by his wrists instead, causing Sam's head to crack back into the dip of sand under them. Yup, he would pass out at this rate.

Gabe's bite stung but he soon rectified it with his tongue, slicking up the scratches, followed by his mouth pushing him open and mashing their lips together.

Sam knew there was no point in fighting and –since it was a dream and he could be honest in a place that wasn't real- he really, really didn't want to stop. He opened up and tilted his head towards him, meeting every motion with equal eagerness until they were both panting messes with shaky limbs and crawling anticipation.

Gabe pulled back with a satisfied pop and hummed, "Now where else do you need it?"

"This isn't fair," Sam nervously gasped as Gabe moved back down to his throat, biting and licking.

Gabe's short body sprawled over every inch of his exposed chest and the flowers from his lei ticked his chest. As if he wasn't already over stimulated, every motion they made grazed their centers together. Gabe bounced up and down the part of his cock still sticking out of his shorts and sparked a new shock with every bite until Sam's body was buzzing. He forgot the point for a moment.

"You're teasing me. And I am not losing this stupid contest."

"You didn't even want to play." Gabe pouted between bites. "When I win, I promise what I make you do will be very enjoyable. For both of us." He rolled his hips the same time he chomped extra hard on his collarbone, making Sam buck. "You have my word on that."

Sam groaned and tried to clear his head with a shake as Gabe moved back up to his ear. He managed to say, "I am not losing pinned to some imaginary blanket in a made-up dream that isn't even real." Okay, so he probably could get up if he wanted but the pressure rising and fighting the zipper under Gabe's hips made it clear he didn't. There was a point to what he was saying though. He had to stay focused. "And I am really not losing before Dean."

"Romance. I knew you wanted to be seduced. Well I can do that for you. Inch by extra-long inch." Suddenly the zip on his pants fell all the way -without even having been touched. Then everything was being touched as Gabe petted the freed member, stroking it up and down as he moved his mouth over Sam's chest and licked to his stomach, over his side, and back down to his hip. "Better?" He hummed from the belly button and Sam gave a muffled sound in protest, though it didn't sound nearly as aggressive as he wanted. "I'll take that as a yes."

Sam groaned and wrapped his hands into the blanket below. What was the point in pushing him off? Gabe would just come back. This was a dream after all. It didn't count or matter.

Oh, who was he kidding?

"You're cheating."

Gabe sat up with a smirk and continued to tug at his member. "Technically you're cheating. But only if they find out. I could do it, you know. I could send you right over the cliff and there would be no one to know but you and I. So, what do you say, Louise? I'll drive."

"That's not fair to- oh god." Gabe gave an extra hard tug -bringing an extra sudden spasm- and just when Sam thought that would be the end of this cock tease, he was encased in one hot, wet gulp. He could feel the tongue inside the swallow licking up his shaft as the head of his dick bumped the back of Gabe's throat, rolling along the ridges and provoking the sensitive skin.

He looked down to see his erection having disappeared, replaced by the top of Gabe's blonde head with is nose pressing firmly into the center of his abdomen. There was suddenly the sound of muffled sucking matching the beat of distant drums and Gabe started wiggling his hips in the air. "This is- this is- definitely cheating. Oh god." He fell back, unable to control himself while staring at that golden color. "Yes. Cheating."

Gabe pulled off in a snap and continued to play with the cock in his fist, faster now with the slick of his saliva. "Such a bad boy, Winchester. Breaking the rules."

"Don't- don't-"

"Stop?" Gabe twisted his wrist and Sam whined. "You'll have to tell me. I'm not reading your mind. Though I have a pretty good idea."

"No you should stop. Should- should stop."

Gabe smiled at him but it was not comforting. It was a smile to remind him just how powerful Gabriel the Archangel of the Lord could be. He knew exactly what he was doing -that he would win in the end- and he would enjoy every single second of it. "Just don't come and you can keep your precious rules intact. No cheating, no losing."

"I won't be able to stop if you don't stop- doing that." Gabe pulled his dick back into his mouth and swallowed him all the way in one go. "Doing that. Oh- shit."

The flat of Gabe's hot tongue curved around his shaft and slowly trailed up the underside before circling the ring of his head and putting pressure on the exact spot that made Sam's knees crumble. He twitched and gasped at the shock that pounded at the touch of that mouth and groaned when Gabe started to suck him further. He didn't think it was possible. No one had done this before. Not all of him. Oh god, every inch.

The pull of Gabe's lips opposed the press of his tongue against the slit and he keened, unsure if he wanted to press up or pull back. His body couldn't make up its mind and it was trapped, quivering in its place with a cock that wouldn't stop pulsing to the beat of imaginary drums and a hammering heart.

The mouth popped off and he cried at the summer wind brushing cool air over his throbbing member. Then Gabe's fingers were curling into his inner thighs, one quickly brushing to the base of his erection and holding it up as he treated his dick like a lollipop and licked him up and down and all around. Just when he thought he could work out the pattern and prepare for the rough to slide against his skin, the trickster changed direction and licked him down, sliding the tip over the base and under his balls.

Sam groaned and rolled to meet him, trying to get his slick member to touch more than the air Gabe was allowing. He was damn near pleading out loud but remembered his pride and used some of that self-control to hold it in.

"I couldn't hear that, Sammy," Gabe smirked and started sucking a painful bruise into his inner thigh, dancing his fingertips against the erection he was purposefully ignoring.

Sammy groaned, "I didn't- ah-" Sam couldn't finish the sentence when Gabe's mouth started swallowing him again.

Lips rolled down the slickened staff and slowly pulled back up. Sam moaned as Gabe hallowed his cheeks so well. There was constricting flesh everywhere, pushing against him and holding him tight. The snug, lush heat was churning the flames settling low in his abdomen and he went ridged with anticipation.

Gabe started bobbing fast, without warning, rolling his head as he pulled and pushed. He guided his thumb down and pressed the underside of Sam's package, grazed it down his premium and searched for the special pressure point that wrought more pleasure than pain. He found it just as he flicked his tongue over the head and popped his mouth open, letting a quick spot of air blow through the gap.

Sam cried his name to the stars, which prompted the egotist to repeat the act again and again. The excitement rocked from every angle. His body shuddered and he thrummed with it. He panted and grunted between breaths as he peeked down at the head swallowing all of him down, not truly believing that Gabriel was the one unraveling him in this way. It was like a dream come true.

Funny how that worked.

Gabe moved faster, batted his tongue against him and sucked him halfway down his throat. Sam could feel the pressure build, his balls tightened under Gabe's thumb, and he knew the end was nearing.

This had to stop. He was about to lose or cheat or both. He couldn't do that. He had a point to make.

"Gabe-"

Oh, but god. His will was slipping faster than his grip on the blanket. He was already winding his fingers into Gabe's hair, pulling him inexplicably closer when he meant to pull him off. His other hand reached for Gabe's arm and harshly curled into the muscle of his bicep. His center was tensing too much. He couldn't stop now. He was right on the brink of spraying his come down that cocky chatterbox's throat

"Gabe-"

But-

"Gabe, I'm- I'm-I-"

He was just about to gather his last bit of self control and yell for Gabe to stop but it was too late.

Sam woke with a start and pulled at the sheets tangled around his body. He was sweaty and panting and could barely register where he was. Only when he looked down to find the lack of Gabe's golden hair tangled between his fingers did he remember what had happened.

Dream. It was a dream.

He hadn't come, he didn't lose. But now he was painfully hard and shaking with the need to let loose that load of built pressure. He pulled at his bottoms and could see his member standing tall and leaking, forming a wet spot on his pajamas.

He groaned and slammed back into the pillows.

Not only did he have the most sensitive and aching erection of his life, but now he knew. Gabriel was not only willing but ready to suck him off until he was a helpless wreck, crying out his name and grinding into his mouth. And maybe more, if he wasn't lying. All he would have to do is lose and he could actually have it all. Have Gabriel.

No. He was not going to lose.

The thought of what Dean or Gabe would do if they won was bad enough. He would just suck it up and wait a few more minutes to calm down and not think about it. He didn't need to orgasm like the others. He was more evolved than that.

He glared at his ceiling and tried to focus on anything but what he had vividly dreamed about until he could feel the blood start to return to his brain.

He woke up too early. He wanted to go back to sleep but realized that Gabe may be waiting for just that to happen. He wasn't sure he could take another one of those sessions again. They needed a talk about that.

He stumbled into the kitchen to look for coffee and found the most curious sight. Cas was in front of the stove, humming to himself with a smile on his face, flipping pieces of bacon. "Cas?"

Cas turned his smile on him and continued to hum. "Good morning, Sam. I made eggs and bacon and bread is in the toaster."

On the other side of the stove were a large bowl full of eggs and a plate of bacon hiding behind. The toaster seemed to be smoking. Whatever, it would be fine.

"You know how to cook?"

"I watched Dean." Cas wouldn't stop smiling as he placed the bacon with the other pieces. It was too early for smiling. "I think I did it right."

Sam gave him a quick grin, started to fumble with a mug, and turned to the coffee machine to see a batch already made. Thank god.

"Dude, that's mine," Dean came bitching in as soon as he finished pouring himself a cup.

"No, it's mine." Sam held it up when Dean reached. "I just poured it."

"I made the coffee, it's mine!"

"You can't just take the whole pot, Dean! It doesn't work that way!"

"Just give me the-"

"No, Dean-" Sam pushed him away as Dean kept reaching for the very hot coffee, now burning his fingers as it splashed over the sides.

"Good morning, Cassie," Gabe walked into the room with a skip.

"Good morning, Gabriel." Cas greeted him with a smile too and pointed towards the food. "Would you like some breakfast?"

"Sounds good," Gabe pulled a seat out and slammed himself down. "Lemme grab this quick-" He snapped and the coffee Sam was very near spilling appeared in front of him. "There we go. Ahhhh," he hummed over his sip. "Coffee's good, Dean." Dean glared daggers at him but was promptly ignored as Gabe turned to Sam with a smirk. "Morning, Sammy. Have a good sleep? Any interesting dreams last night?"

Sam could feel his face start to heat up as he stared at that mouth laying over the ring of the mug and taking another sip. The flashbacks would not stop and he needed to get out of there because he was starting to get hard again and Gabe was not going to help stop that. In fact, he would probably do the opposite. Probably read his mind again. That's why he needed to keep it on safe topics. Not beaches, not belly dancing, and nothing about stupid archangels.

"I'm going to read." Sam pouted but turned back right before he left the kitchen. "Oh wait, I can't!"

Flying books. It was ridiculous. This was not Hogwarts.

Dean stomped over as soon as Sam left and held out his hand to Gabe. "Give me my coffee."

Gabe snapped a finger and handed him a new cup, cardboard with the Starbucks logo on the front and the name Rose written up the side. "Starbucks fresh."

Dean stomped off with the stolen coffee and took the entire pot he made with him as well.

Cas watched him leave with a frown and started to pick at the pieces of bacon. "Why are they so agitated?"

"The wonders of being human." Gabe smirked and snapped his fingers, bringing a bottle of maple syrup into his hand and promptly dumped half the contents on the eggs and bacon Cas had put in front of him.

"That does not seem healthy."

"Neither do the egg shells you left in here but you don't hear me bitching."


	4. Day 3- Cas is Confused

Everyone was arguing and it was very strange.

Usually when Sam and Dean argued it was over something important. Demons. Ghosts. Apocalypses.

Now they fought over the simplest things. The batteries in the remote died. They spilled a bit of milk. They breathed too loud. The light hit them wrong.

Cas wanted to intervene but every time he spoke they would glare and turn their anger on him.

Gabriel sat back and laughed at it all, encouraging their frustration until they stomped away and locked themselves in their room.

That's where Sam and Dean spent most of their time. Cas tried to pull them away from their movies and video games but nothing really worked. For the most part, he let them go and spent time talking to Gabriel about home and their brothers and sisters.

It was good to see him -despite the fact that he was a bit more of a bully than normal. Usually Gabriel would keep his teasing at an acceptable level but he couldn't seem to help himself, turning absolutely everything into a joke. It was annoying. But he was family.

Yesterday, Cas tried to get the Winchesters to eat some of the breakfast he cooked -all my himself- but they weren't paying him any attention. Sam played solitaire on his computer and Dean slammed his headphones over his ears.

He even tried to pull them out of their isolated states by asking for a long overdue tour of the bunker. He tried Dean first -patiently waiting at the end of his bed until Dean opened his eyes so he could ask- but Dean became quite animated instead, yelled, and locked him out. He wasn't sure what he did wrong so he went to ask Sam -as he would usually explain- but he wouldn't even come to the door.

Gabriel said it wouldn't last too long. It was a human thing. Something called cabin fever. But that didn't make any sense. Cas was human and he felt fine. He had no temperature. He checked. Twice.

Actually, he felt more than fine.

This newfound hobby was very enjoyable. Dean's advice to take it upon himself and see what he enjoyed was quite the adventure. And Cas knew a thing or two about adventures, having dealt with demons, ghosts, apocalypses, and the spillage of dairy products.

When it became apparent that neither Sam nor Dean would be better after a night's rest, he tried to offer them soup and crackers. He knew that was what sick boys needed to get well but they both refused him. So, he decided to take part in this unspoken 'cabin fever' activity and also went to his room and locked himself inside. He hoped that he was helping to stop the spread of the virus so the others would be willing to share the same space again.

He stripped out of his clothes and folded the items that were Dean's –which all of them were- and placed them on the floor next to his bed. He made sure his trench coat was properly hung and scooted back to the middle of the room. He smiled as he looked at his closet, remembering Gabriel saying something about Sam being properly hung.

Cas wasn't quite sure what that meant, but maybe it meant Sam was tidy. Cas liked to be tidy too. Perhaps he was properly hung. He would have to ask.

The reason he was standing there naked? It was because he noticed a pair of Dean's socks lying around in the kitchen.

Dean's socks.

Why did Dean takes his socks off in the kitchen? Were they wet? Did he step in something? More milk?

Were they dirty? Was Dean dirty? Perhaps he went to change. Or take a shower. He would need to be naked for that. But why was he naked in the kitchen? That had to be a safety hazard.

The powerful image of Dean nude while cooking popping into his head had him feeling the new and interesting sensation that urged him to move to his bedroom. He wanted to ask Dean if this was what he should do but decided he didn't want Dean to yell at him again. Plus, Dean was still suffering from the fever. He needed rest.

As he looked down, it was clear he made the right decision. It didn't take long for his body to get antsy. His groin started to heat and he watched curiously as his erection started to form, pulling that part of his body to a standing position.

This organ was a funny one.

Cas knew Jimmy's body as well as an angel could know his vessel –to the best of their anatomical knowledge. He healed him many times and knew of all parts. But it was one thing to know of something's existence and feel it flapping between your legs.

When he lost his grace, he had to deal with the annoying slapping between thighs but he could tolerate it. It was when he learned about the human need to use the bathroom and shower where he really had to study it. He inspected every inch over time and could say he knew his penis as well as he knew the back of his hand.

In fact, he played with his penis with the back of his hand many times while inspecting. The two were well acquainted.

What he could understand was his hand. What he couldn't understand was how his penis could be so unpredictable. It went up and down more times than a fledgling with a wing stuck behind its back.

That was probably funnier in Enochian.

Sometimes it was soft. Sometimes it wasn't. In the morning it was usually hard and he had to wait for it to be soft in order to go about his day without drawing attention to himself. Then there were the times it was completely accidental, brought on by a thought. A simple thought that could alter his entire physical state. He could be thinking about pies or the feel of his clothes and he would instantly swell.

The sensitivity was quite shocking.

Dean's boxers were nice because they were soft and they didn't hold him down too tightly. If he swung his hips just right it would even feel a bit pleasurable. Too many times and an accidental boner would emerge and he would wait for it to calm before swinging again.

He found he liked wearing Dean's clothes. They smelled like him. Smelled…good. Like Dean. That smell of aftershave and coffee beans made him feel closer to his hunter. Even when Dean was gone, Cas would know he was there, in a way, because he could sense him all around. Everywhere in the bunker had a bit of Dean.

Dean. Who had taught him how to deal with his accidental erections. He was so helpful.

He ran his hand down the trimmed curls below his stomach and sighed in appreciation. Cleaning and trimming was a complicated process that required much research on the internet. Sam was red faced when he found Cas looking at YouTube videos on his laptop but allowed him to finish the clips. Cas really wasn't sure why Sam blushed. He had to go through the same process. Didn't he? Did Sam not...What did he look like down there? What did Dean look like?

The pressure from his palm on his abdomen felt very nice. He circled the area again and led his hand up to his stomach before trailing to base of his cock again. He smiled when he saw it twitch and felt a small pull in his hips.

Such a strange thing indeed.

He poked at the skin near his base and hummed curiously at the excitement that little poke could build. He tried it higher and hummed again when the same reaction occurred. He pulled his eyebrows together and cocked his head to the side in curiosity. Hmmm. He pushed even harder, trying to lay his erection all the way back down to his thigh. The moment he let go, it bounced right back up and wobbled in the air.

How interesting. No matter how much he batted it around it would always try to right itself.

Perhaps if he forced it down for long enough, it would stay that way? No. His palm covering his length only made him twitch.

What if he did it the other way, against his stomach? No. That seemed to heighten the anxious sensation. Flesh on both sides made his muscles contort with anticipation.

He let go and watched his erection swing back and forth, up and down. Curious, he wiggled his hips and watched it dance in the air.

For something that wanted to be upright at all times, it did move quite freely. With his hips rocking back and forth he could almost get it to slap against his stomach.

He let out a small laugh when he made it hit his thigh and stopped abruptly, his eyes snapping to the door. There was no reason to feel self-conscious. He had locked it and Gabriel would have no interest in popping in on him. Sam always knocked and Dean would be locked out.

Dean.

Just the thought of him reminded Cas why he was standing there. Dean had showed him the way. Dean watched him. Watched him and told him how. With only his voice he pushed Cas over the edge and gave him the best sensation he had ever experienced in his entire existence.

_Cas-_

Dean standing there by the side of his bed with a hand over his groin, a hunger in his eyes, and a simple request to see him come for the first time was all so… mind boggling.

Cas found his hand wrapping around his member and sighed when his body arched in agreement. One stroke up the shaft and he could feel the approval melting out from his center, only to curl back in again when he paused.

There seemed to be no difference in the direction of the stroke. Three strokes up or three strokes down, he found himself itching for more. He allowed himself the pleasure of rocking his hand in both directions, varying the pressure in accordance to his body's need.

The dry tug kept his teasing at a slow pace. He couldn't rub his palm over the head and the skin would pull with every drag but it still made his knees wobble and forced him to sit on the bed.

Too much pressure made it feel almost painful, as if he were pressing too hard on something already ready to pop. Too little and it was irritating. He found himself wishing he had Dean there to tell him what was right again.

Dean.

Dean would know what to say. He would mutter praises to the room and encourage him to go faster. Pant. Groan. Beg.

_Oh fuck. Fuck, Cas._

_Such a fucking mess. Perfect. Fuck._

Cas jumped at the moan he heard leave his lips and stilled his hand, trying to catch the breath quickly running from him. With a shudder, he slid his hand around and hissed at the jerk it sent to his toes. His other hand fisted in the air beside him and he stopped again.

What was he supposed to do with his other hand?

Dean never told him. He had just kept it there last time, too wrapped up in what he was feeling to register. Where was it supposed to go? Was he supposed to use both? Was that normal?

He looked down at the pulsing, pink erection in his hand and hummed in curiosity again. A liquid of some kind was beading at the slit…but he had not come yet. He would surely know if he did. What was this?

He used his free and oddly useless hand to dip into the substance. It was slimy and clear. It smelled…odd.

Tasted odder.

No. He did not like that.

He groaned as his body pestered him to ignore these curiosities and continue to think of what Dean said. He twisted around, found the bottle of lotion on his bedside table, and squeezed it into his hand.

Dean only said one hand so that was probably what he was supposed to do.

He gripped himself again and slicked his member while fisting the useless, sticky, and horrible tasting hand in the sheets.

The wetness coating his member heightened the sensations tickling his skin and he enjoyed every moment of putting it on.

_You wanna grab yourself._

_Oh fuck._

_Oh fuck._

Closing his eyes he blocked out the world and only moved against himself, gripping a bit tighter and pulling faster. He fell back into the bed with a smack, finding it hard to keep himself upright. His fingers spread apart and he rocked into the gaps.

A whine escaped his mouth when he slipped his head in between the tight ring made by his thumb and pointer finger. He pulled them tighter together and laid his fingers loosely under them as his hips rocked into his hand. It surprised him, how quickly his body started to pound up, so fast that the bed beneath him started to quiver.

_Feels good Cas?_

He wanted to go slow -take his time and find out what else he could do- but his body wasn't listening. It didn't want him to. It pushed him faster and harder until he couldn't possibly do more than whimper and writhe. He whined louder with every pump until his cries overpowered the squeaking of the bed.

There was still that edge he had to climb over. His body was shaking but it just wouldn't jump.

_Picture someone you like._

_Imagine it's them touching you._

Dean said that.

Dean.

Cas moaned as Dean's image popped into his head, one hand tucked into his jeans and the other barely keeping him up as it desperately gripped the lip of the dresser.

Dean's mouth moving and moaning as he commanded Cas to go further. As he demanded an end. A plea.

Dean wanted him to- wanted him to- wanted him-

Cas groaned as his body took the plunge and a miraculous foreign heat swept over every inch of him, only leaving Dean's name as a prayer on his lips, fading between his panting breaths.

He smiled lazily. He couldn't help it.

The single moment of weightless sensation reminded him of flying. He found a way to fly without his wings and it was all thanks to Dean. So, so helpful.

After calming down and feeling a bit calmer in general, Cas walked into the hall and started to clean the mess the boys had left behind on the table and the socks Dean left on the floor. Maybe he would try his hand at making dinner. He heard someone mumble something about eating meat, stuffing an entire sausage into their mouth. Perhaps he could make Dean some sausage.

Gabriel laughed at him when he asked his brother to pop some meat into the bunker for Dean, adding, "Why would I do that? He knows where your room is. If you want me to play butcher, I'll just hand him you. I'll get a white wrapper and everything. They make them in that color."

Cas was very confused about what 'them' were but Gabriel gave him what he wanted in the end.

That night they were going to have a game night. It was Sam's idea to pass the time and, though it took some convincing for Dean to be in the same room as Gabriel, they were going to play cards.

Cas didn't know how to play poker and the rules were too confusing so they ended up playing rummy. He was still a bit confused and lost every round but that was alright. Everyone was snacking on the sausage he made, Gabriel was munching on popcorn, and no one was fighting.

Until round nine.

"Bullshit!" Dean yelled at Gabriel.

"Wrong game, Deany," Gabriel smirked.

"You're cheating!"

"I am not. You just can't stand that I'm better than you."

"You are not better than me. You're pulling cards out of your ass."

Sam frowned and mumbled, "Not literally, I hope."

"Prove it, Dean." Gabriel smirked, jumped to his feet, turned around and presented his ass to him. "Go on. Dig in there. See what you find."

"Fine." Dean smirked.

Cas tilted his head. Was he really going to reach _into_ Gabriel? No. Not Gabriel. Never Gabriel.

Even the thought made Cas feel an odd sense of fire flash through his chest.

Besides, that would be quite impossible...Wouldn't it? YouTube had related videos popping up next to the trimming ones. They showed males exploring the inside of each other's bodies. Was Dean willing to...Oh, no. His groin was heating with that other kind of fire. He crossed his legs and covered himself with his coat.

Dean ignored the looks he was getting and went on to explain, "Sam's holding three of clubs, a three of hearts, a seven of spades, a Jack of diamonds, a two of diamonds, a two of clubs, and an eight of hearts. If he'd open his eyes he could put down the eight on Cas' three but Cas won't put them down because he doesn't understand the game. Cas has three eights, two Aces, a six, and a King. You're supposed to have a two of spades, the other threes, a four of hearts, a five of hearts, and two Jacks. The next card is supposed to be a nine but it won't be because it's your turn and you're going to pull the Jack up from the bottom of the deck."

Dean flipped the card over to show the nine and lifted the deck to show the Jack at the bottom.

Gabriel sarcastically clapped, "The monkey can count cards."

"Gabriel," Cas chided, "are you cheating?"

Sam turned to Dean, "You're counting cards? It's rummy, dude."

"And you call me the cheater," Gabriel shook his head.

"At least I can cheat without magic angel feathers," he snapped back.

"Guys," Sam sighed, "no cheating. Why can't we have a nice game?"

"No problem for me Sammy," Gabriel said. "All you needed to do was ask nicely."

"I shouldn't have to ask at all," Sam mumbled.

"But if I'm playing nice, Dean can't cheat either," Gabriel pushed.

"I can't help it," Dean pushed back. "It's all in here," he pointed to his head, "I can't stop playing how I learned."

"You mean how you were trained," Gabriel mumbled.

"You have a problem with the way I was taught cards?"

"I don't care how your daddy programmed his little soldiers."

"What'd you say about my dad?"

"Dean-" Cas pleaded for him to calm down -his legs held together painfully tight and his coat barley hiding the evidence of his sudden arousal. "Can we please stop fighting?"

"Yeah, Winchester," Gabe wouldn't let it go. "Why don't you be a good little soldier, shut up, and do like Cas says. Here," he waved his hand and Dean's dinner plate slid in front of him, messing up his cards on the table. "Stuff some of his meat in your mouth. We all know you want to."

"That's it!" Dean threw his cards across the table and they smacked Gabriel's face. "Screw this. I'm out."

"Cry baby!"

Cas watched Dean leave with a frown but finished the game when Sam requested it.

It took a few minutes but he could relax and sit correctly again. However, he was still uncomfortable by the conversation between the other two. He did not understand it.

"You shouldn't have said that," Sam said.

"And he shoulda just ate Cas' sausage like he wants to."

"Gabe," Sam warned and they fell silent for a bit.

"So, Sammy," Gabriel sang to break the tension. "How do you like Cas' sausage?"

Sam glared at him, though Cas really didn't understand why. He wanted to know the answer too. He worked very hard to make it.

"The sausage I am eating is very good. Thank you, Cas."

Cas smiled. Sam was nice.

"But is it big enough for you?" Gabriel went on to say and Cas was back to being confused. "A big man like yourself must enjoy a really thick sausage. Or maybe you don't like receiving sausage as much as giving them."

"Gabe-" Sam warned.

"Maybe you should make the sausage next time. Give it to us. Would you like that Cas? Wouldn't you like Sam's sausage?"

Cas looked between the two curiously. He felt as though he was missing something. Did Sam cook? "I would enjoy anything Sam makes."

"No, Cas," Sam sighed, "he's not-"

"I know I would." Gabriel cut him off before Cas could hear how that sentence would end. "I would enjoying sucking up every inch of Sam's sausage. Over and over. I can already taste it on my tongue."

Gabriel took another bit of the dinner Cas made and moaned as he chewed it. Cas gave a pleased smile at hearing his food being enjoyed but Sam didn't seem to understand. Instead of commenting on Gabriel's polite behavior, he blushed and started to stumble away from his chair.

"I gotta go- um- do the- yeah."

"But we haven't finished the round,"Cas complained looking down at his cards. He was pretty sure he would win. He had all high cards in his hand. That was good, right?

"Men," Gabriel scoffed as he watched Sam leave, his head tilted so far to the side it was almost hitting the table. "Am I right?"

"Are you right about what?"

Gabriel reached over and messed up his hair, for no real reason. "You're special. You know that?"

The compliment warmed his heart and he smiled at his brother. "You're special too, Gabriel."

"That's not what I-" he gave an exasperated sigh but that turned into a smile. "Thanks, bro."

Later in the night, Cas found out what Dean had been up to after leaving the table.

Gabriel made him aware when he stomped out of his guest room and giddily cheered at Dean who sat lounging on a chair and staring at the TV as commercials played.

"You really thought that would work," Gabriel laughed as he leaned over the back of the chair and pushed his face directly in front of Dean's. "Didn't you?"

"I don't know what you're talking about," Dean pouted and pushed his face away, almost jabbing him in the eyeball.

"What are you talking about?" Cas asked Gabriel.

He jumped away from Dean with a gleeful squeak. "Your boyfriend thought he'd make me lose the bet by pinning his porno mags all over my room. You have an unhealthy obsession, my friend. No man should hold onto that many titty pics."

Dean continued to pout and refused to look at him.

"You got a boner doing that didn't you?"

"Shut up."

"Kinda anti-productive."

"Shut it before I make you shut it."

"What with? Your cock? I'm not interested. Well, not in yours." Gabriel threw a wink over his shoulder and Cas saw Sam blushing again from around the corner.

Sam was red a lot lately. Probably still suffering from the fever. Cas made Gabriel pop in a bowl of ice cream for him so he would feel better. It had two scoops of vanilla and a long banana curving up from the bowl. Sam blushed when he was handed the sundae but it would only take a few bites and that blush would go away. Cas was sure.

Everyone separated quietly until it came to get ready for bed.

Cas was on his way to take a shower when he abruptly halted at the sight of Dean stomping down the hall and crashing into Gabriel's room. "Seriously?!"

"What?" Gabriel put on an innocent face as he leafed through one of the pornographic magazines on his bed. The rest were still up on the wall.

"Take them down."

"No."

"Come on!"

"You'll have to do that. Good luck not rutting against the wall while you do."

Dean stomped away and Cas followed. He gaped at the sight of Dean's room covered ceiling to floor, wall to wall, in pornographic pictures. All of them were nude male modes. All those male models had Castiel's face.

Cas tilted his head as he studied the picture closest to the door. The model had no clothes and was spread out over the hood of a mustang on a hot summer day. Cas couldn't understand why Gabriel decided to swap out the model's face for his but it was well done. If Cas wasn't absolutely certain, he would have thought he forgot posing for the picture.

"Cas?" Dean squeaked when he saw him staring at it. "Get out of here man!"

Cas nodded and pinned the picture back up where he found it before turning towards the shower.

Cas had a lot of favorite things about being human and taking showers was one of them. The water beat against his back and washed away all of his problems. He could forget about absolutely everything and just let the streams running over his ears be the only sound he could hear. No thoughts in his head, no memories of Angel Radio…something to distract him from the silence.

That night's shower was desperately needed after the day's events. Everyone being so agitated was very uncomfortable. It was nice to relax.

All that relaxation drifted away the moment he pulled himself out of the steam and started to walk to his bedroom.

Dean tried to open the door to the bathroom the same moment Cas tried to exit and Dean jumped away like the door was on fire and screamed, "You gotta stop doing that!"

Cas jumped back and looked down. He had remembered his towel this time. Dean was in a towel too. It was clear he was going to take a shower as well. Cas had not used up the hot water. What did he do wrong? "What?"

"Just-" Dean shook his head and looked over him, longing in his eyes. For the shower, obviously. "Get changed in the bathroom!"

"I always dress in my room," Cas frowned and looked around to see if anyone was listening and if they could give him an explanation.

"Well stop it," Dean huffed and his eyes returned to Cas. Cas noticed they wouldn't stop staring at his exposed chest. Had he missed some suds? "And go put a shirt on. Jesus Christ!"

Cas backed towards his room tentatively and shook his head when Dean slammed the door.

He looked down to find he had indeed washed away all the suds and...hmm, another curiosity. His groin was suddenly warm again.

Time to put on lotion.

Cas had changed into a pair of Dean's sweatpants and was on his way to grab some water when Gabriel stopped him at the door.

"Cassie! Just the man-boy I was looking for. Dean wanted to see you."

"About what?"

"I don't know. Dude's weird. He said just to go in his room. No need to knock or anything."

"Alright," Cas nodded and turned back to Dean's.

Luckily he remembered his shirt so there would be nothing for Dean to get angry about. Maybe he wanted to see him to explain the outburst before.

He pushed right into Dean's room, "Dean I came as soon-"

"What the hell Cas?!" Dean scrambled away from him and Cas realized it was because he was naked. He had just come in from the shower and clearly had been changing. "Shut the door!" Cas did as he was told. "No! I meant get outside the door and shut it."

Dean was beet red with his hands covering his groin and nothing else. He backed towards the other side of his bed and stared at it intently, almost moving his hand towards the sheets but cupping it right back again.

"What are you doing here man?"

Cas looked back at the door, "Gabriel said-"

"Fucking Gabriel," Dean growled.

"I can come back."

"Yeah," Dean smiled, though it was not sincere. "Why don't you do that?"

Cas sighed and walked back to the door, realizing that the pornographic pictures were still hung. He was about to comment on it and leave like Dean asked but a painful grunt stopped him in his place.

"Dean?" He spun around to see Dean hunched over by the foot of his bed. Cas ran over and grabbed his arms, forcing their eyes to meet.

"What are you-" Dean huffed. "I told you to get out!"

"Are you in pain, Dean?"

"No, I'm not- would you stop touching me?"

Cas would not let go. He wanted to make sure Dean was not lying to him -as he usually would- and inspect what was causing this discomfort.

"Would you just," Dean whined and Cas jumped when those hands jumped up and forced their way around his side, gripping at his ribs and keeping him in place. "Would you just stop? Stop… just…fucking stop."

Cas stood completely still in Dean's death grip. Dean didn't push him away or pull him close. He just kept him there, stuck standing.

Cas looked closer and frowned at the dilemma Dean was faced with. Dean's body was hot from the heat of the shower. Blood splotched against his tan skin and pooled at the base of his abdomen. Every muscle in his body was shaking against Cas'. His face was pulled in a grimace and he refused to open his eyes.

Cas tried to sway just a bit to test him but his grip was too strong. All he managed to do was push the band of his sweatpants against the head of Dean's erect member.

Dean hissed and gripped Cas tighter. He was sure he would have handprint shaped bruises in his skin if this continued. So, he stayed and let Dean huff.

"Cas, please," Dean finally opened his eyes and Cas lost the air in his lungs at the look under those lashes.

Those full black eyes were pleading. Fighting. Clouded. Confused.

Cas wished he had his powers. He wanted to see what was behind that pained expression. He wanted to read his mind and understand him better. He wanted-

Dean released him with a sigh. "Please, go."

Cas still found himself stuck, an odd gravity radiating from his center and keeping him in place. He knew he should leave but…no. He should leave. He turned to do as Dean asked.

Cas breathed heavily as he awkwardly walked to his room, frowning every time his stiff member pushed uncomfortably against his scratchy pants. He wondered why he was so out of breath. Why he could still feel Dean's hands on his body.

And why he forgot boxers.

Whatever just happened between him and Dean was very exhilarating to say the least. His heart was thudding and his blood was screaming. His body was buzzing and his fingers were twitching. His erection was bouncing with every step and he never felt more need to take care of such a thing.

It didn't take him more than a few tugs for him to explode all over the floor.

It was over too quickly but he was completely spent. He crashed onto the bed, thinking he would clean the floor tomorrow, when the sound of screaming forced him back up again.

If only it were up in the way he wanted. Energetic and erection at the ready.

Well, with Dean the one yelling, he was sure to be up like that again in no time. Dean's voice was very powerful. Dean was very-

Wait. Arguing. Yes. Must go see what now.

"- can't send Cas to my room when you know I'm changing!" Dean screamed.

"How was I supposed to know?!" Gabriel yelled back.

"You saw me in my towel."

"So what? That supposed to be a compliment?"

Dean was fuming. "You can't keep cheating!"

"You should be able to handle it! Mr. Master. That is, if you are still-"

"I am master. I'm fucking King. But I'm going to be ruling some decapitations of certain Tricksters if you don't watch yourself."

"Or what? What are you going to do if I do this?"

Gabe snapped his fingers and Cas blinked in disorientation as he was relocated, directly in front of Dean. Another snap and Dean's hands forcibly closed around him and hugged Cas' back into his front. Cas glared at Gabriel in a way he was sure Dean was also doing over his shoulder.

"Gabriel, stop doing this," Cas demanded.

"Oh, what?" Gabe smirked. "This?" He snapped again and Dean's erection was instant and hard against the cheeks of Cas' ass. Dean struggled to get his arms free but Gabriel had him pinned.

"Stop being such a jackass!" Dean screamed.

"Gabriel, let them go," Sam said as soon as he entered the room.

Gabriel hummed and tapped his chin with a finger in contemplation, "I don't know. I feel with the name Trickster, I have to have at least one trick, don't you think?"

Gabriel lifted his hand to snap again and Sam yelled, "Don't!"

"Let Dean go," Cas added as Dean continued to struggle behind him, now quietly whimpering as every wiggle pushed his erection against Cas' back. Cas could now understood why.

Very sensitive.

In fact, his was begging to swell on its own. Heat flushed his entire body at the thought and he found it hard to remain focused on what was happening.

Dean was yelling, Sam was yelling, Gabriel was laughing.

"Ah, yes." Gabriel sarcastically rolled his eyes. "Poor Dean. You always have to stick up for poor, poor Dean, don't you Cassie? Always have something nice to say about Dean. He's worthy, he's good, he's sexy. Well, maybe not the last one. At least not out loud. You are human now, little brother. I can read your mind too."

"Gabe, would you just-" Sam tried.

"But Dean never says anything about you!" Gabriel went on. "I'll tell you what. One compliment from Dean and I'll let you two walk away. Shouldn't be that hard. Whoops, I guess it is."

"This is stupid," Dean argued.

Cas knew it was. Gabriel's jokes usually were idiotic, but it still hurt a bit to hear.

"Aw," Gabriel pouted exaggeratedly. "You're hurting poor baby bro's feelings. Not even one compliment, Dean? One teeny tiny compliment? I like your tie. You have a nice laugh. A nice ass."

"Alright, fine. But this is still dumb." Dean huffed. "Cas…you…you um…have a nice…The bacon you made yesterday was really good."

"You ate it?" Cas asked, surprised.

"Yeah. Not burned or anything. So- uh-" he coughed and they both groaned at their bodies rocking together. "Good job."

"Was that so hard?" Gabriel snapped and they broke apart again. "Whoops, I said it again. I just keep doing that."

Dean was close to punching Gabriel in the jaw but instantly turned for his bedroom and left Cas to argue with his brother about abusing his powers.

Sam sighed, "You guys are all idiots," and left.

Gabriel left in the middle of their argument and Cas didn't feel like chasing after him. He went to his room to get some rest. Two stomps in and he felt his footing slip. His heart jumped in his chest and he fell straight to the floor on his ass. He shook his head as the pain jumped up from the bottom of his spine and rid all lingering excitement from Dean's forced embrace. What had he slipped in?

Oh...Right.


	5. Day 4- Sam's Payback

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompt for scene one by why_not_sabriel on Ao3. Because why not? (ahaha. ha. ha. ha.)
> 
> Disclaimer: another Seinfeld reference, because I could not resist.
> 
> Also, your feedback is absolutely amazing. I really wish I had more time to write so I could get the next chapter out to you sooner. You guys are fantastic and thank you so much for the positivity! I really appreciate it :D

This was more fun than jello shot wrestling on New Year's Eve in the sub clubs of San Fran with the Brandy Babes playing cheerleader.

And _that_ was fun.

Dean was always a little bitch but this level of pathetic whining was extremely entertaining. He was off pouting in a corner and rewatching every Batman movie ever made -when he wasn't stealing the world's water supply with all his cold showers. All to avoid his walking wet dream.

Speaking of Cassie boy, he was just lost and happy and he was adorable. It was especially awesome because that level of newfound teenage angst made Dean a trembling mess. Ha. Those two in a locked room and Dean would crack faster than Betty C's fresh peanut brittle.

That wasn't a half bad idea.

Gabriel crunched on the candy in his hand and chewed on a large chunk of peanuts as he continued on his way.

Dean lasted longer than he thought. The kid had more will than he expected. Probably from being forced to share the same room with his dad and brother most of his life. Or the whole tortured in hell thing...Whatever. Wouldn't be a problem. Dean would break easy and that only left Sam.

Sammy, Sammy, Sammy.

That boy was going to lose.

Eventually.

Admittedly, Gabriel was starting to feel a bit agitated with the entire thing. He wasn't close to losing -no way Jose- but he would be amiss if he did not say his imagination was getting away from him. He wasn't used to having to wait to get what he wanted.

Humans. Of all the humans, he was stuck with Sam Winchester.

The ever stubborn giant.

Humans were more loosey goosey in their dreams. Less inhibitions because it wasn't real or whatever. Proof in point- that thick, hot cock wrapped around his lips and near spilling Sammy seeds down his throat. Fingers scraping through sand, looking for something to hold onto. The broken cries of-

Whoa! Okay, that's a big fat no right there. He glared at his cock until it went back to the flaccid state it was meant to be.

The humans were rubbing off on him. Oh, dear. What would his brothers and sisters say?

Well, he couldn't have that.

Unless Sammy wanted to actually rub off on him. That he'd be up for.

 _Sigh_.

Dean was just pissing him off but Cas would go check on his boy soon -as the puppy always did- and that would mess with him enough. But Sam…where was Sam?

"Oooh, Sammy!" Gabriel whistled like a dog and skipped from room to room until he reached the Winchester hall. The door to Sam's bedroom was closed…and locked.

How unfortunate.

He popped right on inside -and he was sure glad he did. Sam was in there, bent over by the wall with that glorious big ass pointing towards the door, fiddling with the giant hunk of metal that passed as a radiator. "Well aren't you a sight for mildly hungover eyes."

Sam's head hit the wall with a clap, something metal clanged to the ground, and he shouted, "Jesus Christ, Gabe! Don't you knock?"

"Not usually, no." He jumped onto Sam's bed with a grin and sprawled out over the newly made sheets. Sammy bent back over to pick up whatever he dropped and presented that jean-clad ass back to him.

The moon was full, round, and spankable. The perfect carnal combo for getting a certain someone to howl.

Sam stood back up to fiddle with the measurements or something and Gabriel admired the view even more. Not only was his ass ogle worthy, but his usual button up plaid was undone and rolled up, revealing the skintight A-shirt and the many layers of muscle throbbing underneath.

"So…" Gabriel refused to pull his eyes away from the delectable display and sang, "Whatcha doing?"

"The AC's busted. Only blowing hot air."

"Too hot in the kitchen for ya? Pushing out steam. Hot n' bothered. Your loins burnin'?"

"Ugh-" Sam groaned and pointed towards the door as he reached for his toolbox and picked up some other fixy thingy. "You can leave now. Or, you know, snap your fingers and fix it for me."

"Now where would the fun in that be?" Gabriel smirked, tossed his hands behind his head, and adjusted his body so he could comfortably get a better view. "Go on. Play the handyman Sam."

"You're an ass."

"That bounces like a basketball." Gabriel went ahead and bounced his hips up and down on the squeaky springs of the mattress to prove his point. "Can't wait for you to see. In fact, why don't-" Gabriel choked on his tongue when Sam slipped his hand under his rolled up sleeves and tugged off the over-shirt, slowly exposing the thick biceps a layer away. "Uh-" Oh, no. A spot of grease smudged off his fingers and trailed down his forearm. "You-" Sam rubbed his forehead and a matching mark appeared. "Uh-" He was just one tall, firm, toned, shining statue of exposed arms and fraying pant legs. "Yah-"

"What?" Sam threw out his arms –his muscles rippling as they were tossed to the side. "What's wrong with you?"

"Wrong?" Gabriel scoffed and crossed his legs. "Nothing's wrong. Just get back to-" Gabriel nodded towards the fixy thingy. "You know." He nodded again. "I'd call you a grease monkey but ugh- with the whole- um- uh- ya- yup."

"Ohhhkay." Sam frowned and turned back towards the radiator, only to turn right back around with a triumphant grin on his face. "Oooooh. Alright. Well. Hang on." A small laugh bubbled out of his lips as he made a show of fanning his face. "Still kinda hot. I should take this off too." He pulled at his A-shirt, smudging more grease over the nice clean fabric. "Don't you think?"

Gabriel had to force his eyes up from Sam's now exposed stomach and look him in the stupid smug face. "Why would I care?"

"Right. No, you're right." Sam scoffed –horribly fake- and threw his hand away with an enormous, bogus shrug. "I should keep it on. Wouldn't want to get grease all over myself. I'd have to spend more time in the shower." He reached up and mimed washing his stomach –ruining that poor defenseless shirt. "Rubbing myself down. Really getting every inch."

Gabriel could feel his teeth grinding together and it was the most annoying thing to have to deal with -that pulse of irritating arousal beating its way to his cock faster than a fat kid booking it to the all-you-can-eat dessert bar.

He was an angel, dammit. He could deal with this. He had control. Will power. His sweet tooth wouldn't get the better of him. He was only fat on the inside.

"It's your room. I can't tell you what to do. "

All that control swam right down the drain as soon as Sam slipped his hands under that measly tank top and chucked it away.

Father Almighty, that sculpted body was the perfect embodiment of sin. It's a wonder more angels didn't fly the nest to sample the delinquency. Sam being such a prudish, multi-layer, sasquatch was quite the blessing in disguise. Gabriel didn't like to share. And he'd lick every item at the buffet so others knew that too. Sam wasn't slipping away from him.

But that grease was a slippery one –sliding its way up that broad chest. What else could slip up that chest? Slide against it. Up, down, all around-

_He's actually getting hard. All I did was take my shirt off._

Right. He wasn't supposed to be reading his mind…but…

_I wonder who'd actually come first. I could just spin him around and fuck him into the mattress too see. Stop before either of us comes and then ride him until he begged me to-_

Oooohhhhh kay! No more mind reading!

And holy Luci, it was hot in the room. Sam wasn't fixing the damn thing. He was just standing there shirtless, jeans practically slipping off those angled hips, sweat dripping over the contours of those many muscles –just waiting to be licked off like the fudge topping on a double whipped cheesecake brownie.

"Whelp," Sam huffed and turned back to his project. "Better get to work."

Was he- was he actually flexing?

Gabriel swallowed down a remark about getting to work on something like plumbing –because his pipes could use a good snaking- when Sam leaned over that metal contraption and started wiggling his butt in the air.

No way. He was not flexing his butt.

Gabriel growled into the pillow.

Balls.

His balls were aching and there was no reason for that.

One tiny –okay, not tiny- human and blue balls?! No. No way. Gabriel was the one in control here. He ran the game. He was not going to even remotely think about losing due some ridiculous teasing and thoughtless dirty thoughts. He'd show him.

"You know what would be just, oh I don't know, crazy?" Sam turned around with an amused expression and Gabriel made some sort of noise that sounded like a snort. "You should take off your pants."

"My pants?" Sam actually looked taken aback.

"In for a penny, off with the panties –or whatever those tea snobs say." Sam still wasn't getting it so Gabriel helped him out with a snap of the fingers. Sam's jeans disappeared into thin air and he was left in a pair of tight blue, wonderfully revealing Jockey briefs.

"Hey! I had money in those pockets!"

Gabriel flicked out his hand and a wad of cash appeared –nowhere near the amount Sam could have had and all in one-dollar bills. "Put your pennies where your mouth is. Or in this case, this dollar." Gabriel slid one of the dollar bills between his lips and presented his face for Sam to take the money. He mumbled, "Or maybe your panties."

"Are you expecting a lap dance?" Sam rolled his eyes and-

Balls.

Again.

Lack of clothes or not, that sarcasm should not have caused a shot of heat to spin from his stomach to his legs like that.

The erection returned full force. And like glitter on a stripper pole, it wasn't going anywhere.

Sure, he could mojo himself back to the usual no stripper-pole-in-the-pants state but that was ridiculous. He didn't need his mojo. It was just a bit of arousal from a man. A simple man. A simple, single man. A simple, single, hunky man who was walking right towards him with boxers barely containing that monster of an erection throbbing a thin layer away.

For some reason, his overactive imagination was getting away from him again and the song '[ _Cyclone_](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GXnBjpzRTco)' started to echo inside his mind followed by an image of Sam in those booty shorts, jiggling his goods on the top of a sticky bar table.

Screw this. Actually, screw him. All night long.

"A lap dance?" Gabriel teased around the bill between his teeth. "How kind of you to offer."

Sam glared at him -unfortunately not with his hips rubbing all over Gabriel's face. The only move he made was to sit on the bed and stare. Standing, sitting –it didn't make much difference. The lumberjack was so big, Gabriel was stuck looking up at him no matter what position he was in. Speaking of positions...

Gabriel took the bill from his mouth and tucked it into the band of Sam's boxers. He only hummed a little bit when he felt that soft, forbidden skin brush against the back of his fingers and tugged him as close as he could get him. "There you go. Everyone starts with one." Sam wouldn't stop glaring. "Oh come on. Take a bite." Gabriel put another dollar in his mouth and wiggled his brows. "You know you want to."

Sam's glare shifted to the dollar and Gabriel wanted to squeal like a blue ribbon hog when those eyes turned dark. Then those lusty eyes jumped to his and his cocky smile dropped quicker than the beat of the song. The dollar started to twitch between his lips and he lost track of what he was going to say next.

"I think you're the one that wants it." Sam's thick voice barely had a chance to echo in Gabe's ears when a hand flashed over his groin and roughly pressed on the erection tenting in his jeans. His squeal was not that of a victorious pig. It was a squeal of bacon surprise, followed with his body rutting against Sam's hand.

Sam's smirk was just as dark as his eyes and coming closer. Gabriel had nowhere to go but back into the bed, trapped under those meaty hooks for arms and broad chest above. He didn't stop until Gabriel was completely under him with nowhere to run or hide from the big bad wolf.

"Don't you? Want it?" Sam mumbled somewhere near his ear and suddenly that hot mouth was licking across his neck and sucking on his skin.

Dammit, he was going to say something.

Of course that was the moment Sam decided to rub his hand up and down again, pressing just hard enough across Gabriel's erection to get his hips shaking.

"Seems like it."

Okay, that cocky bastard needed to be put back in his place here. Food was not supposed to play, it was supposed to be played with!

Gabriel smacked his lips and tried to rid the dollar from his mouth, having a bit of trouble and – wow money tasted horrible.

"Sammy, Sam, Sammy. You know I want it. But can _you_ handle it?" Sam popped up from his neck and hovered close enough for Gabriel to catch a whiff of the manly musk of moose, grease, and fruity conditioner. "Can you screw the nuts and bolts without making the pipe burst?"

"Who says it'll get that far?"

"You can't resist. Not when I spin around and let you- oh-" Gabriel sucked in a breath as Sam quickly scooped him up and lifted him against the head of the bed.

Suddenly it became very apparent that Sam was practically nude, his extra warm naked body pressing against him and holding him up and away from the mattress. Then came Sam's tongue pressing his head back as well, shoving so hard down his pipe that he wasn't sure he'd be able to keep his own plumbing from bursting.

"You were saying?" Sam breathed and dove right back in before Gabriel could actually say.

Gabriel was stuck, trapped between the wood of the bed and the wood grinding against his thigh. Then there was his own cock, rolling against the firm body holding him in place and bucking against him.

Thrusting against those rippling abs was intoxicating. Every individual muscle pounded his head and shot intense amounts of toe-curling electricity right through his vessel.

This rubbing. This was the rubbing.

He threw out his arms and pulled Sam closer, bouncing just like he promised as those rough hands clawed at his hips.

Oh boy, this was better than what he thought.

His grace was humming and his body was vibrating. Sam kept pushing him this way and that, no concern for what he wanted –just pressing him higher and closer and harder.

Oh man, that radiator was blowing out a sauna. He should fix that but…oh what was the point again? What was the point of the whole contest? He had a hot'n'ready Sammy pocket in a bed and – _whoa_.

Wait, wait, wait.

What?!

The point was to one up these numbskulls! A little dry humping and was down for the count? No. He had to stop- Sam rolled his hips just right and Gabriel lost his thought to a loud groan. Stop … somehow. Being a higher power and all he could just pop out of this blissful grinding and- wait. Why wasn't he just doing that?

"Well that was great." Gabriel breathed between pants as he backed towards the bedroom door, adjusting his skewed clothes as he went. "Good luck with that whole-" he made some sort of gesture towards the radiator and the bed, "-situation. And uh- later skater."

"Later skater?" he could hear Sam laugh freely before he popped to the other side of the door.

Not cool.

He leaned back against the actually cool door, forced his grace to calm down, and slowed the beating of his heart.

Not okay. How could he have allowed that to happen?

Sam was just Sam. He wasn't Adonis. He looked like one, but he had no magical mojo. He dropped the demon juice long ago. But his eyes were dark… Yeah. That was it. Sam was messing with some bad juju and that's why he felt this helpless around him. Forget the fact that as an angel he would be able to tell. Obviously Sam was cheating. Tricky bastard. Well played.

He'd have to keep an eye on that. He couldn't risk getting that close again.

Not to mention Dean would rub it in his face if he ever found out.

Speak of the devil –and the family reunion's a bitch.

Speak of Dean and… same thing.

Dean stomped past without a word. How rude. He would have to see why his third favorite human was giving him the cold shoulder.

Fourth favorite? No…fifth. Gabriel had a soft spot for the Olsen twins. Oh, but there was the Playboy mansion. Forget it. Dean wasn't in the top twenty.

Since he had some steam to blow off, he followed him anyway. Dean went to get food –surprise there- and chow down in their 'dining room'. Dean was just about to walk through the door when he saw Cas already sitting in his spot, eating leftover sausage. Dean almost tripped as he made eye contact and stumbled back.

"I'll just ah-" he mumbled awkwardly. Almost as adorable as the little brother. "Eat in my room."

Gabriel took the opportunity to step in front of the door and block his way, almost making him spill his precious beer.

"Watch where you're going!"

"Sorry Deano! Just on my way for some quality time with little bro! You're joining us right?" Gabriel chuckled to himself as Dean looked back at the table and longingly towards his room. "You weren't just gonna leave Cassie to eat on his own, now were you?"

Dean glared, said nothing, and walked towards the table to join Cas where he started to eat as quickly as humanly possible in an angry silence.

"Gabriel," Cas spoke when he sat down, "I don't appreciate you using me in your mind games."

"Mind games?" Gabriel scoffed. "Cassie, what are you talking about?"

"It's hard enough with all of us being here without your interference or your ridiculous contest."

"I'm not interfering. If anything, I'm trying to help you."

"I don't need your help."

"No offense, but yeah, you do." Gabriel smirked over at Dean who was trying to beat some kind of record apparently. "I help the confused."

"These urges are something I can deal with on my own. Now that Dean has taught me-" Dean's face was so red, it looked like he was choking on that burger. If he wasn't downing a beer the same time he was breathing, Gabriel might have been worried. "-I can handle this myself. I am not confused. I don't know what help you are trying to give me but it is not welcome."

Dean was near running from the table with his last bite and Gabriel quickly tried for one last comment, "I'm trying to give you big boy Winchester wrapped up in a pretty condom strip bow! You should be on your knees thanking me. And then on your knees in front of him-"

"Gabriel!" Cas slammed the table, loud enough to make them all jump. "I said stop."

"Stop what? Doing you a favor?"

"You're not doing me any favors and I told you to stop."

"Stuff it up your ass, Cas." Gabriel snapped and nodded to Dean. "Or he can."

"Hey!" Dean yelled once he finally swallowed that last big bite. "Watch your mouth!"

"Shut it, Winchester. This is family business."

"Bullshit family business. What do you know about family? You bailed on-"

"Dean-"

"No, Cas. You can't let him talk to you like that."

"He's just acting like this because he's stuck here. It's inconvenient to have wings and not be able to fly."

"Well it's his own damn fault. He's the one that got us all stuck in the first place."

Gabriel spun on him, "And it's your damn fault Cassie doesn't understand why you're being such an ass to him! If you two just got your jollies on instead of playing the self-loathing game of hide in the closet-"

"I'm not hiding in any closet," Cas questioned from behind.

"Then maybe I wouldn't have to force you to be in the same room as him!"

Awkward silence. . . ah- 5, 6, 7, 8!

"Is that true Dean?" Cas, sadly heartbroken, quietly asked.

"I don't have to listen to this." Dean stomped away.

That should have been it.

Sam was off tinkering with toys that were not Gabriel's. Dean was throwing a tantrum in his bath of ice water. And Cas was probably whacking it to something like '[ _I Touch Myself_](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wv-34w8kGPM)'... Who knows what his musical tastes included.

But then came dinner.

Dean didn't come out –stuck in his shower closet. Cas ate nearly as quickly as Dean that day. And that left Gabriel with Sam.

Sam decided to chuck away the habit of super/almost-psychotic hygiene and came to the table still covered in grease and sweat. It was easy to say, Gabriel wasn't concentrating on his food very much. To the point where he almost mistook a pen cap for a french-fry.

Ketchup concealed all.

Then he got to wondering what would happen if he squeezed the ketchup all over Sam's body. Or maybe something sweeter. Cherry flavored?

Sam pretended not to notice but Gabriel could see the smile on his face. To make it worse, the smug little human wouldn't stop finding an excuse to lean into Gabriel's space –reaching for pepper or salt or chocolate sauce. Gabriel wasn't really paying attention to anything more than the arms jumping in front of his face every twenty seconds. Arms that had held him up and locked him into an energetic round of tug-of-tongue only a few hours before.

Then that tall glass of water went ahead and spilled his drink.

"Oh no," he cried in the most ridiculous excuse for shock Gabriel had ever heard. "Would you look at what I just did?"

Gabriel didn't actually notice how the water spilled. He had been preoccupied with the gleam of Sam's left nipple, and the strain he had to put into keeping still so his propped up legs would hide the tent in his pants.

Sam swept at the water with his hands –as if that would do anything other than smear the liquid around. "I'm such a clumsy boy."

Clumsy boy.

Boy.

Bad, bad boy.

Gabriel squeaked out a noise and dumbly nodded his head. "Yeah. You got a hole in your lip or what?"

Well, that did not come out like he meant it. The sarcasm was lost to raspy swallows as he inspected the water that splashed against Sammy's inner thighs. He could see the firm rod straining against the tight, soaked fabric of the jeans. It was wrong, reckless, and 0065ntirely inviting. Gabriel would have to lick that water off for him. Lick it off real well.

"Maybe-" Gabriel blinked when Sam sounded so close, leaning over his legs and into his personal space. "You should check."

"Check what?"

"My lips." Sam leaned even closer and Gabriel's vision blurred as they adjusted to the luscious mouth now inches away –a tongue slowly sliding its way across the bottom lip. "Is there anything wrong with them?"

"Yeah. They're gabbing when they could be put to better use." Gabriel leaned in but Sam pulled away with a smirk. Gabriel glared and poised his hands for a snap –ready to pop himself into that wet lap- but Sam beat him to the pants removal punch. And he was just stuck with his hand in the air, watching as Sam peeled away his jeans to reveal an extreme lack of boxers.

"Guess I better wash off, huh?"

Gabriel couldn't answer. He was busy staring.

Bad boy Sammy. Bad boy indeed. Hiding such a wonderful specimen from the reality of daylight.

Gabriel could already taste that appetizing cock on his tongue. He could imagine taking him whole and feeling Sammy's nails clamping into his scalp, whimpering and moaning like he did on the beach. His mouth was watering and he swallowed the desire to lean over and actually take him when that scrumptious disco stick spun away and that wiggling ass came back into view.

Those hips could move. They were swaying all the way down the hall -only a glimpse at the disco balls- as he walked away without a single word.

Then came the praying.

_Gabriel, hear my prayer_

Oh shit.

_There's something I want. I need. I need it so badly._

Oh, yes you do.

_I need your hands on me. I need you to reach that itch I just can't seem to scratch. I need you. Now. Right now._

Oh fucking hell.

_Please. Gabe. Please._

Oh fuck it all to hell.

Gabriel popped away from the table with his already poised hand and tucked his wings back into position as a spurt of hot water sprayed across his back. Sam stood naked and dripping wet before him, soapy and slippery and –oh he would be fun to play with.

"You're here." Sam smiled.

"You call, I come. Or, you know, you do." Gabriel smirked back.

"Good." Sam spun around and for a moment Gabriel was thrown. That worked. He could top. A bit unexpected and technically hard when standing with the height difference but he was an angel and- "Can you get my back? That grease is really irritating."

Get his back. Sam didn't even know what kind pounding his back was going to...

"Wait, what? You have a literal itch you can't scratch."

"Yeah," Sam chuckled, "What'd you think I meant?"

Oh that was just great. Just freaking great.

"You are a tease, Sam Winchester. A dirty, dirty tease."

"I'd get clean if you let me have some water. Your clothes are getting soaked anyway. Here-" Sam reached over and flicked those dexterous hands under Gabriel's soaking t-shirt.

Gabriel shook his head and backed to the wall. "Dirty cheat. I'll get you back for this."

Gabriel took one last long look at that invigorating and infuriating man and flew away, back to the computer room where he could find and press all the buttons they had.

Seemed fair since all his buttons were being pressed.

Seriously, if something didn't happen fast he was going to explode in one large burst of Sammy angst. Probably streams of it. Salty, thick streams that he could spread all over the cocky bastard's slippery chest...

Three days. Bobby Singer better be on time or he was going to have one hell of a vengeful archangel smiting his trucker cap ass.

After he finished finding every hidden switch –probably opening a portal to a parallel world or something- he decided to just go to his room and watch something on the boob tube to take the edge off.

But there was a different boob waiting for him in his bed. Showered and clean, fully clothed and over the covers.

Well, that could be changed.

"Oh my. Is it Christmas already? One large piece of man candy ready to unwrap under the porno tree?"

Sam chuckled as he looked at the decorations his brother left. "You really could have taken the magazines down."

"And give him the satisfaction? Never." Gabriel skipped the rest of his way to the bed and flopped onto his side with his head on his propped hand and his puppy eyes turned full blast looking up at Sam. The look would probably be more powerful if he wasn't trying to stop the staring contest with Busty Asian Beauty number 43 behind Sam's head. "What's the matter? Do the mistlehoes make you uncomfortable?"

"No, that's not-"

"Oh that's right. You need to be seduced! Romance with a side of payback coming right up."

The angel snapped his fingers and the room transformed into that of a hotel. The ancient furnishings were replaced by sleek frames. The bed was transformed into the shape of a heart with sappy pillows and pink blankets to match. The stripped porn models were stripped from the wall and replaced with a vibrant shade of red wallpaper. The champagne, strawberries, and chocolates were waiting on the side table and Gabriel had no problem scooping up the last into his mouth.

"Really?" Sam laughed, showing the dimples in his cheeks.

"Don't like the honeymoon suit?" Gabriel mumbled around the minty chocolate. "When it comes with free drinks?"

Sam shook his head but accepted the tall glass Gabriel filled. "You really want me to lose, don't you. Why is that? Why now? Why so soon?"

"Now, later, I couldn't give a flying rat's ass. I'll still be prince of the palace."

"So that's it?" Sam laughed and gulped a bit of his drink. "You're actually afraid you'll lose."

"Me?" Gabriel scoffed. "Please. You don't stand a chance."

"Right," Sam drawled. "You're _'evolved'_. Well, if you're so evolved, then how come I can do this-"

The tackle was instantaneous. Gabriel actually lost his newly poured drink as Sam collided with him. A firm hand gripped down on his hips and the pure intensity of that heady stare pinned his head against the sappy pillow, "-and you'll end up like this." Sam slipped the hand from his hip to his front where he traced the outline of Gabriel's erection with his fingers. "Doesn't seem very evolved to me."

Freaking stubborn giant with hands the size of a dinner plate. Talk about unevolved.

Gabriel looked down at his dick in amusement and shook his head. "I can shut that down any time."

"I think that's cheating." Sam slowly put his glass down and flicked his hand over the button on Gabriel's jeans. "And you know what I don't like?" The button popped and the zip slipped down. "Cheaters."

"Isn't that a bit hypocritical," Gabriel gasped as his pants were suddenly around his knees. "With you doing that." He groaned as both of Sam's hands were now gliding up his thighs and catching on his boxers. "Where's good boy Sammy?"

"Shut up."

The boxers flew away and those hands slipped over the exposed flesh. One wrapped right around his cock and his back arched straight off the bedspread as Sam's entire palm slid down his shaft in one pull. Gabriel moaned over the last bit of candy in his mouth, playing it off with a loud swallow and added, "Oooh, I like bad boy Sammy."

"I said shut up."

For once, Gabriel did what he was told. Of course, it wasn't really possible to talk when he was trying to pull Sam's mouth closer so he could suck on that tongue.

And that tongue was better than any sucker Gabriel had tried before. Every time he rolled that muscle between his lips, Sam would pull away and groan right into his mouth. Gabriel had to keep him close by twisting his hands into that stupid t-shirt Sam had thrown on and force him still with a tiny bit of angel mojo.

The moment he gave Sam some pull, the sneaky human went back to stroking him long and slow, twisting his wrist and slipping his fingers over the sleek head. Sneaky, cheaty human.

The pointless shirt started to brush against Gabriel's sensitive skin and he cursed the fabric itself. He wanted the rolling waves of Sammy abs back thumping against him. He pulled even harder, wrung his grip tighter, and pulled at the seams as every part of him twisted from the inside out.

Sam's pulls built faster and tighter and Gabriel panted into his mouth as he bit down on those gorgeous, hole-less lips to keep himself from screaming blasphemous things.

Just one more jerk. Just one more moan. Just one more claw from Sammy's hand and he would- he had to- or he would lose and- had to-

Gabriel whined as Sam pulled away and shifted off the bed.

"Where do you think you're going?"

"Why?" Sam breathlessly replied and ran a hand through his messy hair. All of him was a mess. There was a rip at the hem of his shoulder, his pants were pulled so tight the zipper was about to fly off, and there was a blush over every inch of exposed skin. The perfect image of debauched imperfection. "I thought you'd be _evolved_ enough to handle yourself." Gabriel was just about to point out that he was quite the hot mess himself when Sam added, "Later skater," winked and left.

Dirty, stubborn, teasing giant.

Gabriel groaned towards the mirror on the ceiling and downed the rest of Sammy's drink in one go.

Even the sweet effects of bubbly alcohol could not calm him. He was wired and ready to explode.

Cold showers. For once Dean's tiny little brain had a fascinating idea.

Never mind he'd already had a dip with the Loch Ness Samster.

Gabriel hopped off to the bathroom where he could take a quick dunk in the Arctic to get rid of the Sammy hands still lingering on his skin. He threw on a pair of sweats, shuffled through the halls, and ducked through the door -only to stop dead in his tracks.

"My eyes!" he screamed. "My poor beautiful eyes!"

He ran out of the bathroom, fell to his knees, and rubbed both his hands into his face.

"What the hell?!" Dean stomped out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist. "What the fuck do you think you're doing?!"

"What's going on?" A much more put together Sam decided to join the party.

"Douche bag decided he wanted a free show, that's what's going on!" Dean yelled back.

"Why?" Gabriel pleaded towards the sky. "Why did you have the curtain open?"

"Because normal people don't barge in!"

"What happened?" Cas shuffled down the hall, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

"Nothing," Dean snapped and slammed the bathroom door behind him as he ran back inside.

"Oh Cas," Gabriel pushed up to his feet, "I hope he was taking a cold one or you're in for one hell of a letdown. Shrinkage can be one son of a bitch."

"Shrinkage?" Cas looked to Sam for an explanation. He was too busy holding back a laugh to answer.

"Sammy," Gabriel turned his pleading eyes to him. "Please. Get that dadforsaken image out of my head!"

"How do you expect me to do that?"

Gabriel wiggled his eyebrows. Sam chuckled and started to walk away with the eager angel on his tail. Cas knew enough to head back to his room and Dean stayed locked away long enough for everyone to go to bed.

"Please."

"No."

"With margarita cherries on top?"

"No."

"Just a shoulder."

"No."

"A peck?"

"No."

"An ankle?"

"No."

"Not even Victorian risqué?"

"No!"

"Prude."


	6. Day 5 - Gabe Cheats Again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Credit to Mrs. Always Right who said a little something about an awkward hug and my brain went yesssssssss, you are so right. (ahh, make me stop)

Dean stared at his ceiling -actually- he glared at his ceiling. He glared so hard and long that he was genuinely surprised his entire room hadn't been swallowed up in flames yet.

If only that were possible. Gabriel wouldn't let him off so easy. Wasn't letting him off at all.

The object of this staring contest was not the usual unexplainable motel stain or random black fly; it was a full sized poster of Cas -dressed in nothing but the tiny excuse for a washcloth he held in front of his dick and the smirk he flashed just below his bedroom eyes.

None of the porno pics came off the walls!

They were indestructible. They could not be torn, burned, or moved. Only Cas managed to take one down but as soon as he put it back in place, Dean couldn't get it off again. He couldn't get any of them off. And he was stuck in a room full of naked Cas… unable to get off.

He closed his eyes and his cock jumped in his sweatpants. It was pointless. The image of Cas' naked body was never going to leave him again. He was stuck staring at it no matter what he did. Haunted by his pliant limbs, shaky hands, and virgin cries.

Shit.

He'd been hard 24/7 -ever since laying eyes on Cas all laid out. At least it sure felt that way.

He was tempted to see if Gabe was spiking their food or something, like he had with their beers. Maybe he could skip out on a meal to see if he was on some sort of Viagra merry go round, but it was food and he wasn't insane. Not yet. Gabriel sure was trying to make him.

Fucking Gabriel. The stupid ass angel who –with all his Godly, all knowing knowledge- didn't have enough common sense to knock on the damn door and saw him in nothing more than his birthday suit the night before.

Well. That was one way to kill a boner. At least he could sit up.

Dean stared at his feet and contemplated what to do. He was so bored. He could go watch more anime but he'd already stared at his laptop for so long he was pretty sure his eyeballs were internally bleeding. Then there was staring at Cas' spread... Alright, his eyes needed a break. And so did his own spread.

A look at the clock showed it was late. He slept in again. Except he didn't. He couldn't fall asleep or stay asleep for very long. Tossing and turning because it was too hot and then it wasn't and then it was. Ugh- stupid ancient ACs. Didn't Sam say his was broken? Maybe he could get him to fix his. Whatever. Didn't matter. There was no point.

Coffee. The entire jug of fucking coffee. That's what he needed.

He shuffled over and groaned as his head hit the door. Locked. What the hell? Was the curse thing moving onto bedrooms? He jiggled the handle again. Then he put all his weight into turning it. Then he started slamming. Then, he heard Gabriel chuckling.

"Gabriel. Let me out. I needa piss."

"Humans," Gabriel scoffed. Dean's middle tickled with the feel of grace and suddenly his bladder was quite empty.

"Hey! Get your voodoo out of my internal organs!" He shook his head and swiped the sleep from his eyes. "There's a sentence I never wanna say again." He tried the door. "C'mon. Open the fucking door."

Gabriel whistled, "You are cranky in the morning."

Dean ignored him and continued to battle with the handle and bolt, nearly spraining his wrist he was pulling on the metal so hard. Neither were budging. "Son of a bitch."

"Hello, Dean."

"Son of a bitch!" Dean gasped and flung his body around to find Cas standing at the foot of his bed. Right. Cas normally wore clothes. The artwork surrounding them was Gabe's doing. Dean sighed in relief -hopefully covering the small bit of disappointment. "How the hell did you get in here?"

"I don't know," Cas looked around as if he just realized he had not flown there. "I was in my room- uh-" Was he blushing? "…polishing my belt."

"Polishing your belt…" Dean's eyes flickered down the belt holding up Cas' jeans. It didn't look particularly shiny.

"My… other belt." Dean nodded awkwardly –Cas didn't have another belt- and Cas went on, "Yes. Gabriel must have brought me here. He must be playing another prank."

"Well I'm getting pretty fucking sick of his pranks."

"Oh come on!" Gabriel cheered from the hall. "They're funny!"

Dean kicked the door, "You are not funny."

"You wanted to play. Or have you lost already? Have I drained the last of your tiny human willpower?"

Dean cross his arms and scoffed, "I'm still the guardian of this galaxy. You?"

"I haven't polished my belt."

A look to Cas showed he was blushing again.

"Great," Dean huffed. "Get us out of here."

"Mmmmmmmmmm. No."

"Why are you doing this?" Cas called and tried the door for himself. Dean rolled his eyes. As if he didn't do that already. "You are only making this difficult situation harder."

"That's the idea."

"Brother, please. Can we not fight today?" Cas jiggled the handle again. "Gabriel?" He wiggled his palm a little harder and Dean found himself drawn to that movement. Cas was pretty fast and flexible in palming that thick handle. Maybe he was double jointed. What else about him could move that fast and loose?

Dean coughed as his dick twitched again and came up with a brilliant plan to stop his rising wood. He pushed Cas out of the way, jumped back, and rammed into the door.

"C'mon Cas. Put your shoulder into it!"

They counted down from three and both jumped. The door vibrated straight to its hinges but didn't budge. They did it again and again until all that filled the air were the sounds of their bodies banging and grunts from repeatedly beating such heavily enforced wood. Damn these Men of Letters for being so thorough. It was too hard to snap.

"Uh-oh," Gabriel cheered when they took a break. "Sounds like too much fun in there!"

"Gabriel!" Dean rammed a few more times until he realized he was the only one doing so. "Cas?!" Cas did not join him in his charge. "Cas?" Dean spun around and gasped.

Cas was gone.

In his place stood one hell of a woman. She was nearly his height with long, dark hair framing her angled face and decked out in one jaw dropping dress. It was long and flowing, just barely touching her strappy high heels, and dipping so low he was sure he could see the top of her belly button. It showed off every one of her curves and she had plenty of them. He'd count if he weren't distracted by the slit that teased up the side of her leg and cut off at her hip, just giving him a taste of that lickable drumstick.

"Dean?" she called.

"Sorry sweetheart." He shook his head and held out a hand in apology. Damn Gabriel for zapping in fantasy bimbos. Definitely cheating. "I'll get you outta here in a sec. Gabriel!"

"Dean it's me," they mystery woman called –as if she knew him.

"It's whooooo-" Dean spun around and his slow morning brain clicked the pieces together. The dress was blue. The same shade as her eyes. Those eyes... She tilted her head to the side and the light shifted just right and Dean recognized where he'd seen them before. "Cas?"

"Gabriel!" the woman –uh- Cas yelled.

"What's that little sis?" Gabriel snickered. "I couldn't quite hear you."

No wonder. His laughter was obnoxiously loud.

Cas stomped over in his –uh- her heels and slapped a perfectly manicured hand against the door. "Gabriel!" Dean was too stunned to laugh but his- her voice was so different. It was still deep, kinda a sexy smoker thing but without the gag factor, but it was still a woman's. Ha, Cas was a girl. "Turn me back into a man and open this door!"

"What? What was that? Did you say it's getting hot in there? And you need to take off all your clothes?"

It took another moment for Dean's foggy brain to realize what Gabe had said. "What?!" he yelled, suddenly finding everything a lot less funny. "No don't-" Too late. Dean's sweats disappeared into thin air –as did the rest of his clothes littering the floor. "You son of a bit- bi- bi- bi- bi- dammit."

His eyes were drawn to Cas and if they weren't strained before- he was really straining them now. Gabriel took her clothes away as well. That left Cas with her body in the open, completely uncovered, and totally on display.

Curves. Boobs. Legs. Oh my.

Oh no.

"I did not request this!" Cas yelled.

It was so wrong. It was Cas but it wasn't. It was…she was amazing.

She wasn't too skinny -just the right amount of muscle with those curves that went for miles. Did he mention the curves already? Cus not only was there the whole hourglass shit going on but dammit, her legs. She was tan all over -as in all over- which made him wonder, and then he ended up staring right where he knew he wasn't supposed to stare.

Well... Cas' dick was gone.

He knew he shouldn't look at the trimmed hairs outlining her sex but... it had been five days. Five days. He forgot what a woman looked like naked. And she looked... looked... awesome.

He wanted to reach out and touch that skin. He wanted the challenge of finding any imperfections because from his point of view, there was none, and it would be one hell of an excuse to get that close. Her long hair was tickling the pink of her breast and they were perfect, man, they were perfect. And she was just standing there, letting him look.

Cas was hot.

Well, he was already- in his real body and- but...dude.

Oh and all the porno mags were now of naked woman Cas too. That was just great. Fucking great.

Dean managed to remind his caveboy teenage self that his mouth should be closed and breathed, "Fuck," to no one in particular as he glared at the floor.

24/7.

Maybe he needed to go to a hospital.

"Brother," Cas smacked the door again. "Give us our clothes back!"

"Gabe-" Dean's voice cracked and he spun to the door too, slamming as hard as he could with his fists and his feet –making Cas jump away. "Gabriel! You son of a bitch! Let me out! Let me out or I'll kick your ass!"

"Can't kick my ass behind the door!"

"Let me out _and_ I'll kick your ass!"

"You gotta work on your terms."

"Just let me out! Unlock the damn door. Sam! Sammy! Help!"

"Sammy can't hear you Dean-o. He's…busy."

"What're you doing to him? No! Don't tell me. Just get me the fuck out of here."

"Dean-" Cas tried to distract him.

"This isn't happening. This is not happening."

"Dean, yelling won't-"

"Shut up, Cas! Gabriel!" Dean's nails scraped across the paint and he rested his sweaty brow against the frame. "Please! You hear that? I'm begging here. Gabriel? Where the hell did you go?! I know you can hear me!"

"Dean," Cas' voice came muffled and Dean had to look –though he didn't really need to force himself. Cas' face was pushed down against her chest and she was concentrating on a mark trailing along the side of her stomach, following it with her fingertips. She turned her body to follow the angled line up her back and revealed the tattoo. "What is this?"

God dammit. Cas had a pair of giant, intricate, realistic angel wings tattooed on her back. They were big, black, and beautiful.

"No. No. Just, no. I'm not- No." Dean threw his body against the door, lamely trying to hide his never ending boner in the process. "GABRIEL!"

"Stop screaming my name! Cas might get jealous!"

"I'm going to kill you!"

"I thought you could handle yourself."

"This isn't fair!"

"What wouldn't be fair would be, oh, I don't know…this."

Cas gasped and Dean spun to her, expecting something bad but, she didn't look any different just…dammit…just good.

"What?" Dean asked. "What'd he do?"

"I'm not sure."

"Cas?"

Cas swayed on her feet and looked down at her body –sliding a hand down her stomach. "I feel… strange."

"How strange?"

"I don't-" Cas slipped her hand over her bellybutton and moaned, "hmm."

"Oh no," Dean threw his head against the door and closed his eyes. Not the sounds again. "What exactly- how- um-?"

Cas tilted her head and evaluated the nonexistent question with a superior curiosity, "It's like a stream of fire shot straight down my stomach. I don't understand. Why am I wet here?"

Dean peeked out from under his lashes and saw Cas experimentally dipping her fingers between her folds. "Oh fucking no."

"I feel…" Cas moaned again and Dean nearly rutted against the wood. Again. "It is similar to the sensations I have when aroused. But the genitalia is different. How can I tell?"

"I'm not doing this," Dean whispered aloud and then in his head before stepping back and shuffling away. He was starting to smell her arousal in the air. He needed to get away. "You are, okay Cas, just…" She slipped a hand up and her finger must have found her clit by the sound of that squeal. Or was that his own? "L-leave it be. And let's get out of here so I can go- um- shower and you can…" he gestured to her general body, "-go deal with you."

"How do I 'deal with me'?"

Dean ran a hand over his face and huffed into his palm, "Man, ask Sam. Sammy!"

"Dean-"

Dean felt a small hand delicately land on his bare shoulder, jumped back, and quickly put his hands back in front of his junk, "Don't touch me Cas!"

Cas let her hand fall and dammit, his puppy dog eyes were somehow impossibly round in this body -thick winged eyeliner only making them look bigger. "Have I offended you Dean?"

"What?"

"Did I do something wrong?"

"Where the hell is this coming from?" Okay, Dean knew where it was coming from, but anything to get off the subject of how close Cas' naked body was to his right now. There was only so much room between the door and the dresser.

"You haven't looked at me in days." Dean's eyes fluttered up from the floor to try and look her in the face but he failed. Completely. So he looked at the wall. And oh, there she was right on the wall, giving him those eyes. The naked was everywhere! His gaze dropped back to floor and Cas' voice couldn't pull him back, "You've been avoiding me."

"Avoiding?" Dean scoffed and shuffled back. "I haven't been avoiding."

"Do you hate me Dean?"

Stupid puppy eyes. Dean sighed, "I don't hate you, Cas-"

"But you don't like me anymore." Cas' shoulders dropped and Dean just wanted to scoop her up into his arms with how pitiful she looked. If only scooping her up wouldn't lead to sexing her up. Oh hell. She looked so sad, "Is it because I'm human? That I can't help you in the way I once could. That I can't get us out of the bunker. That I don't have these anymore," she gestured to the wings on her back.

"No, man." Dean raised his hand to clap her back but immediately slammed it back down in front of the other one. His erection was too strong to hide with only one palm. Oh god, how was he going to get through this? "Cas, I mean-" He sighed and took a few steps closer –still far enough away where the possibility of touching and therefore jumping was quite limited. "You're still you and I like you, or whatever, just – god dammit dude, do we have to talk about this?"

"Yes."

Dean looked back up into those big blue eyes and cursed himself when his gaze dropped to her chest. All bare, and naked, and lady-like. "I can't take you seriously when your chest is all… there."

Cas looked down at her body and frowned at him. Of course she didn't even cover herself... not that he would tell her to. It was her body. She even said, "I am no different in this body as I am in my own."

"Uh -yes. You are. You have those."

"Are you objectifying me?"

"Objecti-" Where did Cas learn that word? "What?!"

"I have breasts in my male-"

"It's different, Cas. Okay? And are you really telling me we'd still being having the chick flick talk if you weren't a chick?"

"I don't understand. You believe my body changes the way I feel?"

"No but, ugh. Okay look. You just don't understand, alright? You're new to this whole self-love thing."

Cas shook her head, "I understand giving into the pleasures of the flesh. My time on Earth has changed me. Emotions, arousal... it is all very confusing but I have experienced them many times, as a human and angel. Had I understood the protocol I would have started masturbating a long time before. I now find there to be a constant need. I don't know what I would do if I could not come every day. It is routine. I understand how frustrated you must be. I have already made myself come three times today and I feel as though I must again at the moment."

"TMI dude!" Dean was practically panting after hearing that totally unnecessary tidbit. Why was Cas always so innocent about it? Talking about coming like it was the fucking weather. Trying to hide her innocence behind those damn distracting eyes. He ended up staring into them again, seeing only Cas. They were exactly the same. Extreme blue with a side of gray tinging the outside and that one on the left with the smudge of black just outside the pupil... Man, he looked into Cas' eyes too much.

He tried to look down but then he was right back to staring at her chest and watching her breathe.. just to make sure she was... whatever.

Three times? Really?

Cas' room was right down the hall. Did he do it when Dean was sleeping or when he was awake? How quickly did Gabe pop him in after he was done "polishing his belt"? Oh god. His dick was really fighting the cupping of his hands and he grit his teeth. She was going to be the death of him. "Just…I need some alone time. Okay? You get that? It has nothing to do with you being human or whatever. It has everything to do with you being-" Eyes, chest, hips, thighs, ass. "Well, you!"

"Okay," Cas still looked upset and stalked to the edge of his bed where she curled up on top of the covers.

"No, I didn't mean- Oh fuck it."

Dean tried the door a great many times but Gabriel wouldn't answer their call. Not even at lunch.

The monster.

Cas was silent the entire time. She stayed in her little ball. Dean wanted to scream. She wouldn't stop fidgeting! Her legs kept sliding together and she kept twisting her hands in her hair. Every time she moved she moaned. Even her angel wings teased by fluttering with her lean muscles. She was just one curvy ball of come and get me.

Come on and get me.

Come on me and get me.

Come on me, then get me.

Come on me, then get me off.

What a tease.

This was the insanity Gabe wanted him to feel. Trapped in a box with naked curvy Cas surrounding every inch of the room. This was his padded cell. Only, he was pretty sure Gabe's plan was to make him the one to paint the walls white.

Dean had been staring long enough to be called the biggest hypocrite in the fucking world. Not that Cas would say anything. She just let him stare.

Everything about her was Cas just… different. Pretty. Really pretty. It was still him in there, somewhere between those breasts and those eyes.

Seriously, the chick flick moments needed to stop!

"Cas? Are you just not gonna talk?"

Her bottom lip jutted out into a pout, and damn if that wasn't adorable. "You said you wanted time alone."

"Well that's kinda hard to have when you're in here. Ah shit- that's not. I don't mean…just… what's up?"

"A picture of me covered in soap."

Dean snorted and peeked at the poster on the ceiling above his bed. In the change, the washcloth had turned to a multitude of bubbles. Great.

"No I mean how are you? You haven't stopped squirming since you laid down."

Cas seemed to ponder the possibilities and settled on, "Warm."

"How bad is it?"

Cas moaned long and low, shifting and twitching as she twisted her hands into the sheets. "Bad."

Fucking hell, Cas was totally humping his bed. The bed meant for his humping. Not that he had... okay, so, he'd been pretty alone in that for a while. Cas was just throwing that in front of his face. What did Gabriel do?

"Cas?"

He sighed and made his way to standing, still completely awkward with his hands covering Little Dean. He stole a pillow from the other side of the bed, adjusted it over his lap, and sat as close to the edge as he could without falling off.

Yeah, cus that was really gonna help things. His 'galaxy' was far, far away from being under control. Rebellious little shit.

"Cas? Do you need me to hide in the closet while you- uh- um- you know?" Cas would not turn to him so he placed a hand on the arch of her wing, meaning to turn her over. He gasped. Cas was burning up. She was quite literally hot in every way imaginable. A closer look showed she was flushed from head to toe, a sheen of sweat on her skin, and her toes were curled impossibly tight.

She flipped to him and it was clear she was lost to the thumping of her arousal. Her forehead was scrunched, her eyes were blown to near demon black, her lips were parted, and she could barely speak she was so lost. "Dean- It's um- it's bad."

"Shit," Dean bit his lip. He tried to restrain himself by pressing his hands into the pillow but even that was too much. His erection was nearly driving it off him. He was already staining the cover. The feathers were too soft for any bit of relief. Soft like her skin...

Distraction. Distraction.

Ummmmmmm...

"Is this what they looked like?"

"What?" she whimpered.

Dean ran a hand along the smooth contours of the tattooed feathers but that was the very opposite of the right thing to do. She arched into his hand and cried out.

"I can't see-" she panted. "Can't see what they look like."

Dean nodded sharply and took his hand away. He was only making it worse. Clearly.

Cas whined and she spun around to grab his wrist and put it against her face. "Feels good-" She nuzzled into his palm and Dean just stared. Again. There was nothing else to do as she continued to move against him and his bed, whimpering and – fuckity fuck fucking hell. He had to pull his hand away but she followed him all the way to the edge.

Then there was that gleam. It caught his eyes as she shifted her body and he looked where he dared not to. Again. Smeared between her thighs was the evidence of her arousal. She was so wet and- oh no- this was Cas. Cas, Cas, Cas. Castiel. Angel of the Lord. Not, not, not gonna happen. Never. No. Not- not going to lose. Nope. Gabriel can't win.

Why couldn't he win again?

Cas was rubbing up against his side, pushing her breasts against his arm and moving those slick thighs towards his own. Thank god for the pillow pussy protector.

She was just so fucking hot. She wouldn't stop grinding and her nipples were such a big tease, prodding him, trying to make him touch them. Oh no, he almost raised his hand but it was so tightly wound into the pillow, it had to stay. Where was his other hand? Oh, right, it was on her side now, guided by her. He was petting down the feathers that curved around her hips. She was so smooth and- "Cas-"

Dean's broken cry only made Cas moan, her breath warming his ear, and she was only getting closer. He just sat there and waited as her warm lips trailed down his cheek and neared the corner of his mouth.

Fuck it.

He spun his body around and threw the pillow to the floor as he pushed his hand through her hair and pulled her to his mouth. His lips pushed her open and he roughly thrust his tongue inside as he desperately tried to kiss the needy moan right out of her. He was rewarded with the sound and she curved her thigh between his legs, sliding her slick desire just against the shaft of his cock. He growled, curved his fingers into her side, and kissed her with all the hunger of a man returning from a five day famine.

She was a messy kisser and damn it was perfect. She tasted so good. Like honey or something sweet. When'd they get honey? They needed more. There was a magazine somewhere by his closest with one hell of a creative idea for it.

That's how they'd celebrate. Whatever they did with that sticky honey –probably in a bathtub, maybe with whip cream too- would just have to outweigh whatever Gabriel or Sam decided to do after winning. How bad could they make it?

Whatever. It was over. Contest lost. It was too good kissing those soft lips with that small bite coming from the stubble scraping his- his-

Girls don't have stubble.

Dean scrambled away as he realized the body on top of him was no longer the silky, small woman. It was all muscle and chest hair and, looking down at their cocks rubbing together, Dean had all the proof he needed. 100% male.

Well... Cas' dick was back.

Cas' lust filled –but still puppy dog- eyes found his and he was frowning. "You would kiss me in the other form but not in my own?" Shit. Dean knew he should answer but it was just one long, awkward pause. "I see."

Dean fought to catch his breath and sprung his hands from Cas' hips, "You were a girl and…I… I…um…I mean..."

Cas didn't wait for him to magically come up with an answer. He stomped over to the door, tried the lock, and simply said, "Gabriel". The door opened and he walked out into the hall. Buck naked.

Dean's head flashed from side to side. _What the hell just happened?_

Once he decided to dress –in his bedsheets because Gabe was a prick- he found Sam in his bedroom and tried to get him to explain.

"So Gabe turned Cas into a girl and what'd he do exactly?" Sam seemed a bit distracted. He had been acting weird from the moment Dean entered his room. First of all, he was surprised to see Dean, but then he didn't even comment on Dean's bed attire and then he kept trying to rush him along – not getting mad like Dean hoped.

"I don't know man. It was like she was hopped up on ecstasy or something."

"Yeah, that's bad. Wait, is it she or he? Cus Cas is a he…right? Or neither?"

"You're missing the point."

"Yes, right, no you're right. Gabe gave Cas his wings after he just lost them and that was a dick move."

"Well, yeah, okay, I didn't think of that. But that's not what I was saying. I-"

"This macho contest is stupid and Gabe's being an ass. I'll go find him and talk to him about it."

"No, that's not-" Sam left before Dean got a chance to tell him that wasn't the point either.

Sam didn't come back with any news of talking to Gabriel. They were both missing. That left Dean to wander around -now dressed in baggy Sammy clothes- and try to take his mind off what happened earlier.

All he knew for sure was that Bobby couldn't come soon enough so he could… well… you know.

As Dean figured it, Cas was just under Gabriel's stupid spell and needed to get his/her rocks off. Dean was just taken in by it -and who wouldn't be? The girl was humping him! So yeah, okay, he kissed her. It's not like it mattered. It was just awkward because it's always awkward when sex almost happens but doesn't. Everyone's frustrated cus it's all a big tease but they get over it. Cas'd be fine once he went for round number four.

At least Dean thought so.

Cas kept popping up but every time Dean tried to talk to him, he would ignore him and walk away. Even when Cas was flipping through the TV channels –watching _Dr. Sexy_ because Dean had made him a fan- he wouldn't acknowledge him. He even did the unthinkable. As soon as Dean joined him on the couch, he flipped _Dr. Sexy_ off and watched an infomercial on curling irons instead.

"C'mon man. What's with the cold shoulder?"

Cas did not answer him. Just got up and walked away. With the TV remote.

When Dean went to search for dinner, Gabriel walked over and Dean finally had something to take his frustration out on. He blocked Gabriel's entrance to the kitchen and confronted him, "Alright, spill. What'd you give Cas?"

"Give him?" Gabriel looked genuinely confused.

"You made him all-" Dean struggled to find the words and motioned to the southern region of his body instead. "You can't just keep drugging people."

Gabriel scoffed, "Drugs? Not me. I have seen the error of my ways. The light has guided me to a new path!"

"Bullshit."

"It was all him. All his pent up sexual regression shoved into one moment of absolutely wanna get it on with Deanarino need." Gabriel kept poking at his chest until he batted his hand away.

"What?"

"You know," Gabriel shrugged and ducked under his arm. "Cas n' you. How he wants to jump your bones. Ride the disco stick. Take a one way trip to slick dick city."

Dean felt his face crunch into a new level of confusion, "What?"

"Well, Dean. When two people _really love each other_ and-"

"No, no, no. You said Cas n' me. Cas wants to- Cas doesn't want to- Cas isn't- You gave him something. You mojoed his mojo."

"You are the dumbest ape I have ever met. Hello?" he sang. "The little dude is totally in love with you?! I mean come on! You knew that."

Why did everyone keep saying that? Dean shook his head, "You did something."

"I'm going to say this real slow so open your Neanderthal ears and listen up. The dude _wants_ you. Not Adam, Eve, or Steve. You. Deeeeeean." He poked him in the chest again, just to make his point. "Cassie's a bit slow with the whole comprehension thing - _unlike you_ \- otherwise he'd be taking you to pound town. Oh," Gabriel gasped and cocked his head in the same way Cas did when he read Dean's mind. "Maybe he'd be riding to it. Whatever. All I did was wind him up. His tinker toy only ticks for you, you great big idiot."

"Ugh-" Yup. That was the most intelligent thing he could say.

Gabriel went on talking to himself as he opened and slammed cupboards, "I coulda sworn the locked room thing would work. Oh well. Move! I gotta get more honey."

Dean only moved because he was still confused as all hell. "Honey?"

Gabriel picked up the jar from the cabinet behind him and skipped out the door, "Don't call me honey, sweetheart."

Well, shit.

Gabriel could just be lying but- ugh- if he wasn't then- ugh- well, shit.

Cas... liked? Liked him? As in... ah, shit.

After that little act Dean pulled with the whole 'hit it and run' attitude -without the hit and all the run- well Cas already deserved to be pissed. If he wasn't just trying to rub one out to rub off the spell Gabriel put on him then…well, shit. Dean felt like shit.

How the hell was Dean supposed to apologize for something like that?

Hey Cas, I know you're not talking to me because I kinda rejected you earlier. I didn't know I was rejecting you. It's not cus you're a man or a woman or whatever you are. It's just, I was freaked and you were rubbing on me and I was really turned on. Not that I wouldn't be if you were you but you weren't you. I mean, you were but you weren't. And then you were. And I wasn't me. Not that I was someone else. I mean I was me just-

Ah. He'd fuck it up.

Food. That he couldn't fuck up.

But nothing with honey in it. Gabe just had to ruin that too.

He set to work making mac'n'cheese. The stuff was there, it was easy, and they had hamburger meat. Cas would like that. He'd make it extra meaty just for him.

"Extra meaty? Really Dean?" Gabriel teased from the door. "Mind keeping those dirty thoughts to yourself?"

"That's not what I meant!" Dean yelled but Gabriel was already gone, a half empty jar of honey inhis place. Dean stared at the jar with a frown. Should he throw that away or…

His timer went off and he finished scooping hefty sized spoonsful into a couple of bowls before going to find Cas. His bedroom door was closed. Dean kicked with his feet as his knock but Cas told him to go away.

"Look," Dean sighed and leaned towards the crack in the door. "I'm only gonna say this once. I was an ass earlier. This whole contest thing isn't exactly cotton candy and rainbows. So…sorry for uh- objectifying and ugh- not- helping you out or whatever... I guess."

There was a bit of shuffling and Cas opened the door a crack. Dean held up their dinner and beers and gave his best version of the killer puppy dog eyes. Maybe he shoulda worn eyeliner.

No. Wait. What?

"I brought food."

Cas cracked half of a smile and opened the door the rest of the way so Dean could walk in. There was a moment of shuffling as Dean held up the hot bowls until Cas finally said, "The food can stay."

Dean frowned at the very real disappointment that settled in his chest and set down Cas' dinner. "Oh." He did fuck it up. Food of all things. How could food not work? "Okay."

"No," Cas called when he tried to leave. "It was a joke."

"Oh." Dean breathed out, awkwardly stood by the door, and scratched at the back of his neck. "So, we're okay?"

Dean almost regretted asking because then there was the silence and, of course, the staring. Just staring. Totally concentrated on Dean, eyebrows furrowed and curiosity crinkling the corners, completely oblivious to the tension in the air.

Dean swallowed audibly. Looking at those eyes now, it only made him think of how needy they had been before. How dark and pleading. Grinding, kissing, stubble -oh god, he needed to stop staring back. Sammy's jeans were loose and they wouldn't be able to hide his arousal.

Then, Cas was suddenly on him, wrapping him up in a giant bear hug. "Apology accepted, Dean."

"Alright." Dean smiled into his shoulder and clapped him on the back with both hands. Good. Yeah, this was good. Then, his hips started to twitch. "Alright you can let go now."

"Uh-" Cas pulled at Dean's shoulders. "I can't."

"What-" Dean tried to pull his hands away too but they were stuck like glue. He couldn't step back, couldn't pry him off. They were bound together. "Oh shit- what? Gabriel!"

"Awww," Gabriel popped into the room with a big stupid smile on his face. "Would you look at you two? Adorable. I should take a picture."

"Let us go Gabriel," Cas was the first to yell.

"Sorry boys. Gotta check on the other Winchester. He's in a very sticky situation."

"What- Hey." Dean pushed Cas in a circle so he could glare at the place Gabriel had just been.

"Haven't you done enough already? Get back here! What the hell does that even mean?"

"Knowing my brother, you would rather not find out."

"Well this is just great. What are we supposed to do?"

They could not get untangled no matter what they did. After a bit of maneuvering they could move their hands, arms, feet and heads, but their chests stayed stuck. It was if their belts were clasped together.

Hopefully nothing was going to be polished...

After screaming at Gabriel for a half hour, trying to find him or Sam –shuffling through the halls in an odd sort of three legged race- both of them ignoring where the third leg was coming from-, and coming up with nothing; they had to accept the night for what it was.

Totally awkward.

Cas sat on Dean's lap with his legs curved around his back as they ate on his bed by reaching over each others' shoulders.

It was so frustrating.

Every time Cas moved he pressed right up against Dean's swelling cock and, of course, Dean kept thinking about all the fun things they could do in this position. And Cas wouldn't stop with the stupid fidgeting! Two minor adjustments and Cas could have been riding him past pound town, right onto slick dick city, and into cum country.

They tried to pretend they couldn't feel each others' hard ons, kept their annoyance locked up in eyerolls, and finished their meal in edgy silence.

It was still way too early to go to bed. After many awkward activities, including trying to play cards and finding dessert -Cas touched the honey and said it tasted funny, Dean smacked it out of his hands with his elbow- they settled on TV. It was hard for them both to get a good view but they eventually found a place where Cas could watch atop Dean's lap and he could go on his laptop.

That would have been fine if Cas didn't keep asking to get up. After tripping over each other for the millionth time Dean got too mad and just picked Cas up to walk him around -usually to the kitchen for water. He really was on an extreme water kick. Sam was teaching him too much hippie stuff.

Basically, the whole Siamese twin thing got really old, really fast. Especially when Cas had to pee. Stupid water.

"Can't you hold it?"

"For how long, Dean? I tire of urinating as much as the next human but we don't know how long Gabriel will keep us like this."

Dean tried to rub at his face but Cas' shoulder was in the way. He just ended up bumping his head into Cas' ear. "We are _never_ talking about this."

With the amount of stretching and acrobatics necessary for all that to happen, Dean though it might be worth mentioning it just so he could prove he deserved to be in the Olympics.

When it came time for him to use the bathroom, well, he decided to hold it. He'd been in a car most his life, he could handle it. There was no way Cas' legs were going to wrap around his shoulders.

Yes, that's how he did it. Actually it was only one leg. And it was never happening again. Ever. ... Unless they were headed down the pound town road trip. And no one was peeing. Waterworks was kind of a cock block. If the pounding was even a possibility. Stupid Gabe for getting in his head.

"Dean, I'm tired."

No shit. He'd been using Dean's head as a pillow for the last hour.

"As soon as Gabriel-"

"My brother has not been around all day."

"Alright," Dean sighed. He had a point. And he was getting pretty tired too. Cas was like a warm blanket and the couch was just too comfy. But how where they- ugh- the bedrooms were- they only had- there was only one bed. How- who would be- where- Oh jesus.

Cas insisted on brushing his teeth and Dean joined him –as if he had a choice. Then they were off to Cas' room because he didn't have a thousand porno mags littering his walls or a funky AC system.

They collapsed on the bed fully dressed because –no- that wasn't going to happen, and it wasn't too bad. Cas was kind half on him, half off –wrapped up in his arms. Dean wouldn't admit it but he liked to- uh- cuddle. It was pretty okay.

Sleeping still seemed a bit off so his mind started to wonder. It backtracked to the conversation with Gabe and Sam and well, he knew he had to say something. He wasn't really sure what pillow talk he had in him -especially when he started to think about the abused pillow waiting on his bedroom floor- but something had to come out of his mouth. It started with an uncomfortable clearing of the throat, "Uh - Cas. About your wings. Gabe was a dick for giving you those tats."

And those tits, but Dean was going to let that slide.

"It's alright, Dean. I miss them, but I don't mind. It's the way Gabriel is. I will talk to him tomorrow. About many things." Cas made a point of trying to peel himself away and Dean huffed out a laugh when he couldn't.

"Alright. And uh- Cas... about um...that thing. It's not just cus you were a girl... I mean I ... shit... I um- I could have been just as... into it... if you were you and ugh... I was surprised and- Male or female, or angel or not, you're still you and I like- um- Cas?"

Cas was gently snoring against his shoulder.

Thank god. He didn't know where he was going with that.

His body settled and his eyes started to close. All that filled the air was Cas' breathing and the hum in the piping. Cas wasn't overheated, just warm and soft. In a single moment Dean forgot they were connected -that Gabriel did this to them. It was just them, there, in the dark, safe and locked away. Yup, it was actually nice.

Until Cas started grinding in his sleep.

His body was pushing against Dean's side again –his completely male body with a completely firm boner poking into his hips. Then his body shifted and he was more on Dean than off, rubbing his dick across Dean's clothed erection. Dean threw his head back and moaned as he tried to push Cas away. Cas only snuggled in closer.

Nope. Cas' AC was busted too. It was way too hot. And urrrh- god. Cas needed to stop. Every time he curved back Dean's member dove into the divot of his hip, the heat spiked all the way to his toes, and he let out a -very manly- whine. That just felt so good. He twisted his body under Cas again and let out another masculine cry.

Where did Cas learn this stuff? Did he just know how to drive Dean to the edge with only a couple of strokes? Even sleeping, he knew exactly what way to go, how hard to press. It's like he knew his body inside and out - oh, right.

Jesus, it was unfair. Tears were literally springing to Dean's eyes at the relief of having a writhing body on top of his. How could he push this eager beaver -minus the beaver- away?

What would even be so bad about losing again? He was willing to lose earlier. Very close to it. It's not like he didn't want it. He wanted it. Cas wanted it –or at least with the way Cas kept groping him, he was pretty sure he wanted it.

So Gabriel would brag and that would be it. One embarrassing thing and it'd be done. It would end this nightmare of a contest.

Dean twisted his head on his pillow, starting to feel the discomfort in his neck as his body tensed. That's when he caught sight of the artwork on the ceiling. His face contoured back into one of confusion and he had to blink to see what it really was.

He thought it was a mirror at first because it was a perfect representation of their two bodies entwined together in that moment. The only difference, ceiling Cas and Dean were naked and -by the expression on their faces- nearing their final destination.

Dean huffed to himself, kicked Cas to his side, and stuffed the blanket down with his feet so it was in the way of Cas' bucking hips.

Two more days.

Two more fucking days... with no fucking.

Fuck.


	7. Day 6 – Sam Plays Along

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [I feel mer about this chapter because of reasons. Rather than continue to glare, Imma post. owlwithafringe on tumblr was lovely enough to offer to beta this chapter but I didn't hear back, so I may or may not be changing things if they get back to me.]
> 
> Thank you for being patient and supportive!
> 
> Lots of someones said a little something about Gabriel being punished? Was that a thing you wanted or something? I mean I can't see why. He's such a sweetie :}
> 
> No collars… yet. Well...

Sam was usually a heavy sleeper, but all hunters were trained to wake up at the sound of a scream.

He burst out of the room, grabbed the closest gun, and ran towards Cas' bedroom. Heart racing, he gripped the door and screamed, "Cas?!", but no one answered. On the count of two he swung it open and jumped inside with his pistol raised- only to lower it an instant later.

"Dean?"

Instead of finding a young kid quivering in the corner because of a demon, vamp, or –hell- even a Rugaru, he found his older brother curled up against a pillow on the edge of Cas' bed, panting hard, eyes wide, full of fear and... something Sam really wished he hadn't seen.

"Good morning, Sam," Cas said. He had not yet realized the use of the pillow lying by his side and greeted Sam with much more than the casual saying.

"Morning," Sam smiled anyway and turned to Dean with a smirk. What was Dean doing sharing Cas' bed? "Morning, Dean?"

Gabriel manifested next to him a moment later, already laughing his head off. " _Wood_ you look at the time? According to Dean's lap, it's morning." He jabbed Sam's side, "Get it, Sammy? Get it? Wood, morning. Morning wood."

Sam _wood_ have said something to that immature –and quite predictable- comment if Dean hadn't burst through the two of them, knocking them out of the way, screaming about needing to pee like a race horse.

"I don't understand. Is there something special about the way horses urinate, or is it only those that compete?"

Sam took the time to explain to Cas that there was no real rhyme or reason behind the saying –or at least none that mattered- before exiting to make himself breakfast.

As strange as the alarm was, the wakeup call was appreciated. Sleeping on the couch was extremely uncomfortable for most, but for someone of his height it was just one long cycle of lumbar torture. He, the usual 'burst of fucking annoying sunshine' -or so Dean said, was not a happy camper.

Gabe caught him rubbing the back of his neck and wiggled his brows from across the counter. "Bad back, Sammy? Need me to rub it out for you?"

Images of sandy beaches, too-small washcloths, and greedy octopi flashed through his mind.

The hula music was most definitely playing outside of it.

"I don't need you to rub anything, thank you very much."

"Oh, come on. All you need is a-"

Sam pointed with his pistol –the music disappearing the moment his finger brushed outside the trigger. "If you say a healthy dose of dick, I will lock you in the dungeon."

Gabriel smirked, knelt into the light, and flicked out his tongue, "Kinky."

Sam stared at the wet spot shining on the barrel in what could only be described as absolute confusion. Did he just _lick_ his gun…. But-but-but why?

Follow up question. Why did he find that so, well, exhilarating? He only just woke but his heart was already racing and now his breath was pulling ragged. If anything, he should be furious. It was too early for this. The gun was loaded and the safety was off. If his finger slipped too far he could have blown Gable's head off. Not that it would have done anything to an all-powerful angel -and maybe a little part of him had similar violent thoughts from time to time- but why was Gabe being so stupid?

"That's not the only thing locked, loaded, and ready to blow," Gabriel teased, leaning up and over the table so he could pointedly stare at Sam's groin.

 _Stop reading my mind_ , Sam internally growled.

"I'm not reading anything."

Sam glared, put the gun down, made sure the safety was on, and resisted the urge to rub the shine off.

Gabriel had been pushing him far beyond his limits for days now. This was just another way to tease him. To remind him of everything that fast moving tongue could do.

Sam needed to move quick to make his food so he could avoid another demonstration. He did not need a repeat of yesterday.

Even the worst cooks could boil water but even the best would find it hard with Gabriel in the room. He made it his job to step in front of every drawer Sam reached for, kicking back cabinets and guarding the coffee grounds -all with a blindingly bright smile. The only thing boiling in the room was Sam's blood. A crime against nature when the coffee pot was right there.

_Burst of fucking annoying sunshine._

Not only was the breakfast block annoying because Sam was actually pretty hungry, but Gabe kept lifting his body in very particular positions and places, making sure Sam's fingers swiped his thigh every time he reached for something new. He found it harder to ignore that irritating heat –though he was sure it was due more to actual irritation than to the side swipes his finger's made against Gabe's cock.

If only he could- could- reach- and- and not freaking get a- a fistful of- NUTSACK! God!

Once the annoying ball of energy floated a good three feet in order to shove said cock in Sam's face, Sam lost it. He gripped the sides of Gabriel's torso and pushed him to the ground, keeping him locked in place with a foot pressed down on his stomach. It would be harder to make coffee that way, but at least he could reach the tap without flying into Peter Pan and the lost boys.

He lifted the pot, flipped the tap on, and gasped as cold water splashed against the thin layer of his cotton shirt. Gabriel giggled under him and he pushed his foot down a little harder as he peeled the wet shirt away from his skin.

A rubberband was wrapped around the nozzle of the hose.

He yawned and swept his fingers over his aching head.

It really was too early.

"What's with the sad eyes, Sammy?" Gabe called from the floor, wiping a few wayward drops from his brow. "Did the grumpy puppy not get enough sleep?"

"It's your fault."

"My fault?"

Sam slammed the cupboard a bit harder than he meant, making them both jump… but maybe that was because he put all his weight into Gabe's thigh as he walked away. "There are ants swarming my bed. I have to do laundry. Again."

Gabriel wasn't intimidated by the pre-coffee glare and sang, "Worth it."

Sam groaned and pushed-past/stepped-on Gabe again as he mumbled to himself, "Why honey? Why'd it have to be honey?"

"Your brother thought of it."

It took a moment for his morning brain to catch up, but the thought of what they did and Dean being involved in any way had Sam's face distorted so harshly in disgust. He could actually feel his skin prematurely wrinkling.

"Hey!" Gab defended from the floor, "Not my fault he thinks so loud. It's the only way his brain knows he's listening. But a good idea's a good idea."

Good idea. Right. Sam picked at the dry spot where his t-shirt clung to his bicep. He apparently missed some in the shower, both the intentional and unexpected rubberband one. That was probably because their full sized shower suddenly stopped working mid-stream. He didn't know who to blame for that: smells like teen spirit or 'strawberry honey tastes best'. Who knew that concoction even existed? Or how good it would taste.

Gabriel's chuckle made Sam realize he was still fidgeting and quickly dropped his hand to his side.

Stupid strawberries.

Gabe lounged on the ground with all the comfort of a feline and rested his head back on crossed arms. "And after all that, you're still lumberjack of your forest? No wood cut down? Did you at least call timber? You have to warn the locals when you have an oak that big."

"No? Yes? Um… I think." A part of him wondered why he played along with these ridiculous witticisms –especially when he was ready to squash the joker under his big toe- but he couldn't resist the infectious Cheshire grin on that smug face. Annoyed, he responded, "I'm still commander of the one man army."

"Allow me to salute you." Gabriel tipped two fingers off his forehead, rose to his knees and pawed at the hem of Sam's sweatpants.

"Hey!" Sam grabbed at the fabric before it could budge. "Would you stop?" He lifted the empty pot in his hands, "I haven't even had my coffee yet!"

"Military men are early to rise. I know one wakeup call that'll have your trumpet blasting."

"Hey-"

"We have to raise the flag pole!"

"Stop-"

"One gun's licked clean, let's see about the other!"

Sam was just about to stuff the tiny angel into the can cabinet when Cas' voice interrupted, "Gabriel."

"Morning, brother." Gabe thankfully stopped trying to rip his pants off but kept his claws wrapped around Sam's waist.

"We need to talk," Cas growled –obviously oblivious to the situation in front of him- and gestured for Gabe to follow.

"Uh-oh," Gabe smirked at Sam. "Looks like I'm in for it now." Despite the sarcasm, he crawled towards his brother and followed Cas into the other room.

Sam gave them their privacy and debated the urgency of a shower versus his access to breakfast in peace.

After a bowl of fruit, a cup of joe, and another scrub, Sam went back to his room to face the mess Gabriel had made the day before.

It was all a mess. Even the memories.

Honey, tongues, and surprisingly fuzzy handcuffs.

Truth be told, he was the one left a mess. A hot mess. Gabriel was the master of many games and he was making every move he had. Since it was obvious to him that Sam was more than willing to play, he could use every manipulation in the book against him. For that, he blamed himself. He should not have gone along with it -with any of it. He should have left the game alone. But he played right into Gabriel's hand...and mouth.

For swearing he was completely irritated with the pest, he sure was kissing him a lot. And stripping. And touching. And licking.

Yesterday only made things worse.

A day filled with temptation, teasing, and taunting.

Yup. A lot of the blame was on him. Maybe he should take a step back, be a bit more passive. Do things like not agree to the safeword being "collywobbles" just because Gabriel though it was hilarious to hear coming out of his mouth. The fact that he let it slip out in the first place was another blame to put on himself.

But at the same time, he needed to keep playing. He already made his reasons clear for wanting to win this stupid contest and Gabriel's immature fighting was only solidifying them.

It was one thing to have Gabriel annoying the hell out of him, taunting him to the point of madness, driving him insane, but he usually had a break. If only the son of a bitch would let up for a single moment. He couldn't find time to breathe at this rate.

Sam glared at his sheets as he pulled them towards the laundry room. This would be the moment for his breather. Just him sticking the sticky remnants of his bed into the washer, but, of course, that's when Gabriel did what was most expected of him.

"Perfect idea, Sammy! Uneven washers really get my motor running." The annoying angel was suddenly on top of the machine, his legs spread open and his hips canted forward. "Spin it to high! Let's ride it through the jeans cycle!"

Sam felt his passive approach slipping as his hands tightened to fists. This constant badgering tested his limited tolerance.

He smacked Gabe off the machine and clicked the buttons as he normally would. "You're acting like a pig."

Gabe could not be deterred and went back to sitting on the washer, smirking and leaning into the vibrations that rattled his voice, "Everyone likes bacon! Speaking of, bacon and honey make one hell of a breakfast combo. If you wanna grill up a rack, I'll line your rack with-"

"Stop!" Sam snapped with the rest of his patience. "Can't you just shut up? For one freaking second can you just shut the hell up?!"

"Whoa, Sammy," Gabe picked up a pair of discarded boxers and twisted them in his hand. "What's got your panties in a bind?"

Sam stared at Dean's -or maybe Cas'- did they share?- pair of boxers being mulled into a ball. Snatching them up and stuffing them into that constant chattering mouth was a thought. If only he had duct tape.

The follow up thought came from his dick. It twitched –something Gabriel didn't miss- and that smirk just made him furious.

He stopped his thoughts. Instinct kicked in. He grabbed Gabriel by the wrist and dragging him out of the room.

"Ooh, where we going?" Gabriel cheered, clearly not picking up on the vibe Sam seethed out.

The bacon was about to squeal.

It wasn't far to the dungeon. The demon sigils painted on the floor wouldn't do much of anything but the angel cuffs would keep him in place. At least for a little while. Then he could have some time to breathe.

Gabriel seemed to enjoy being pushed around, wide eyes smiling up at him as he clicked the lock into place. "There's bad boy Sammy. Romance shmomance. I knew you'd wanna play. Hey!" Gabriel's teasing tone cracked when he realized Sam was backing towards the door. "Where are you going?! This was just starting to get good!"

"I'm leaving."

"And going where? You're stuck in this bunker. Might as well be stuck with me!"

Sam's sanity wall was crumbling at paper thin, but he had enough in him not to punch the self-righteous jerk in the face –mostly for fear of the holy/unholy consequences. All he did was cross the room and pin him back, holding him with what should have been a bruising grip. "No. You're acting like a big angel dick. And you know what? Why am I even surprised?"

His trapped companion blew a raspberry and shrugged, "What am I even doing?"

"You can't just play with people the way you are. The way you always do!"

"It's just a game!"

"Well it's a really freaking annoying game and I'm sick of playing!"

The next argument Sam had lined up fizzled out as Cas walked in, completely oblivious to the thing he was interrupting.

Again.

"Have you seen Dean?" he asked with a frown.

"He hasn't come out of the bathroom?" Sam asked.

"Maybe he's jerking it in-" Gabriel was cut off as Sam slapped a hand over his mouth. No amount of licking was going to get him to move it.

"Yes." Cas shook his head, "The bathroom has been vacated but I can't seem to find him. Do you know where he may be?"

"Try the shooting range?"

"Alright."

"Wait, Cassie, wait!" Gabriel screams were muffled and barely understood. "Are you just going to leave me here?"

"Are you alright?" Cas asked Sam instead of Gabe.

"Go ahead, Cas." Sam smiled, "I'll let him out. We were just having some fun."

"No. He's lying. Cas! Castiel!" Cas left. "Okay, okay. Relax before your gargantuan-self crushes me." Sam pulled his hand away and wiped the slick off on Gabriel's shirt. "I get it. You're wound a bit too tight and can't see I'm offering the release you need. But may I remind you, you didn't even want to play in the first place. You can lose."

"That was before I realized what an ass you were going to be about it."

"So you wanted to play because of my ass? Seems a bit masochistic." A smack to that smug jaw would have been so satisfying but Sam stomped towards the door instead. Gabriel's worried cries only just reached him in time, "Fine! Fine. We can do something else. Watch movies. Finger paint. Braid each others' hair. Prank Dean. Anything! I'm just so boooOOOooored. And you're all I have to play with. Ugh! After helping our bros mack it to the beat of suppressed sexual tension-"

"What?"

"Cassie yelled at me. I really was helping!" Gabriel sat back and pouted like the toddler he was acting. "No one wants to have any fun."

"Did you say Dean and Cas were- uh-"

The mischievous grin slid back into place, "Like a couple of middle schoolers."

"Wait, wait, wait. Back up. Dean _kissed_ Cas?"

"Or the other way around. Can't really see through a wall. That's not really- hey where are you going?"

Sam didn't wait to hear the end of this bit of gossip. Like the pre-teen Cas and Dean were apparently being, he ran off to find his brother and dangle this piece of news in front of his macho ' _I don't swing that way_ ' face.

Could none of them just act their age?

Cas was on the search but Sam still figured he should check out all the usual spots. All the bathrooms were clear –probably good for their mysteriously disappearing water supply. The library was empty, as was the kitchen. No one was in the shooting range and Dean's room was empty –as were the photos Gabriel hung around the walls, much to Sam's relief. Where else could he be?

As it turned out, the weapons closet was the place to go. Dean was in there, hiding behind a shelf, cleaning his gun.

Sam felt the need to clarify that it was his actual gun and not a metaphor for _anything_ else.

Stupid Gabriel.

"Dean!"

Dean jumped and raised the empty weapon as if it were loaded.

Oh god, the metaphor was still sticking and Sam had to shake his head to clear it of the dirty thoughts. It was his goddamn brother for god's sake.

"Oh," Dean said, "It's you."

"Dude!"

Dean jumped again at how loud Sam yelled, "What?!"

"You kissed Cas!"

"I didn't-" Dean's face returned to the blushing horror from that morning and he shook it perpetually through his denial. "Kiss? No, I- I- No! I did not kiss Cas!"

Sam looked down at his older brother and glared with what Dean had termed his 'bitch face'. He even went so far as to raise an eyebrow at him, daring him to continue with the lies. An old trick, but a good one.

Dean started to crumble, his mouth trembling and his voice rising as he sputtered, "He was a girl!"

"Okay, ignoring the girl thing for a sec, you kissed Cas!" Sam jumped, "Castiel. Former Angel of the Lord."

"So what?"

"So about time!"

Dean's eyes popped open and he dumbly mumbled, "What?"

"Why aren't you with him? What are you doing in here? Shouldn't you be talking or well…"

Dean's face turned crimson, "Dude!"

"Well, why aren't you?"

Dean spun away and fiddled with more weapons behind him, "That's none of your business."

Sam rolled his eyes at the back of Dean's head. For as smart as Dean was, he sure was an idiot. "Don't tell me it's over this stupid contest."

"So?"

"This is Cas!"

"It was one kiss. So what."

"So what?" Sam sputtered and found his hands flailing, hoping to bat away his brother's stupidity. "You've been coo-coo for Cas since day one! Don't even try to deny it, Dean. I know when you like someone. So go talk or don't or whatever. Just go."

"No."

"Screw the contest, man!"

"What, and go screw Cas?"

The wrinkles were back. "Okay I don't want to know that. But if that's what you both want-"

"I'm not listening to this."

"Why not? Cas has been looking for you. He wants to talk to you. You can't just keep running from this."

"I'm not running."

"You've been hiding in your room for days. Now you're hiding in here." Sam could hear himself sputtering as he ran both hands through his hair, "Even when you come out you're just a pain in the ass."

Sam was not oblivious to the tension they were all feeling from the consequences of this contest. There were certain aspects of the biological need for orgasms that had to do with everyone's… irritation. He felt just as… irritated… as Dean. Some people were just more evolved to handle it. Really, he had this contest in the bag.

Dean glared and gestured towards the door, "You can leave now."

"I mean, wouldn't it be worth it? Just forget this stupid macho madness and talk to the guy you've been ogling for forever."

"Ogling?"

"He's human now. And he's here, with us. I know you don't think you deserve someone but it's Cas. You've literally been to hell and back together and he lo-" Whoa. Not the 'L' word. No need for Dean to freak out more. "Likes you. If two people like each other and they can be together, they should. You deserve it. How much longer are you gonna wait? Are you saying you don't like him?"

Dean sighed long and low, his usual sound of defeat. "It's not like that, man."

"What's it like then?" Sam stopped grinding his teeth together long enough to say, "Explain it to me."

"The apocalypse happened how long ago and we're still being jerked around by these angel dickheads. I'm sick and tired of the mightier-than-thou shit. Gabriel's played with us too many times. Don't you remember what he's done? What he did to me? To you? He turned you into a car, man! Look, Bobby's coming tomorrow and then we can all take a breather and- you know what? Why do you care?" He paused and nodded with a bitter smile, "Or are you just talking me down so I'll lose and you can win? Is that it? Can't handle it can you? Well, way to play Sammy. I'm not losing. And you can suck it."

The urge to punch something was back. "Whatever, Dean."

Pain in the ass. Just like he said.

Sam went back to the kitchen to grab some water and calm down for a bit. When he could breathe with unclenched fists, he ate lunch and left, only to find Cas sitting in the next room, trying to play the handheld game Gabriel left him –and failing by the sound of it.

"Hi, Cas."

"Hello, Sam."

He thought about telling Cas where he could find Dean but after the way Dean just snapped at him, he wasn't sure it was such a good idea. Dean would only make things worse.

The longer the silence lingered, the more his conscience urged him to say something. "I-uh- heard about yesterday."

"Yes," Cas nodded while glaring at the game. "Gabriel has promised to stop using his powers on Dean and I. At least for the duration of our time here."

"Good. Yeah, that's good but that's not what I meant."

"What did you mean?" Cas asked as he continued to glare at the screen, pressing the buttons far too hard and enthusiastically tilting the screen in the direction he wanted the character to go.

"I heard about uh- you and Dean."

"Dean and I?"

"About how you guys um… kissed."

Cas finally looked at him and lowered the game to his lap, muffling the sounds of his character dying. "Yes. Gabriel had a part to play in that too."

"Well, did you want to talk about it?"

"What is there to talk about?"

"I don't know." Sam tried not to smirk at the confused wrinkle in Cas' brow. He truly was alien to such things. Just like a middle schooler. "Do you like him?"

"Of course I like Dean. I like you too Sam."

Alright, he couldn't not smirk at that. "I mean like as in like, like."

"Like…" Cas' head tilted to the side, "Like?"

"Never mind, Cas. You guys can talk it out later." He mumbled, "When Dean's not being a jerk."

Just as he was about to leave, Cas pulled him back by casually asking, "How are you and Gabriel?"

"Me and Gabe?"

Cas nodded, as if it were obvious, and went back to losing his game. "He told me you were mad with him. That was before you took him to the dungeon."

"Well… " Sam almost forgot he had him locked in there. "Kinda."

"He seemed quite upset. Your opinion matters to him."

"He said that?"

"Not exactly. But as you know Dean, I know Gabriel. He watches over you and your brother. He only wants what is best for you. He cares about you deeply."

"He told you that?"

"And then he said that when we are able to leave the bunker he would take you to a candy shop. There are many in the world, but I would expect Gabriel to know of the best. He seemed quite excited about lollipops."

So close.

So close to being something decent. Oh well. That was Gabriel for you.

"Thanks, Cas."

The irritation and annoyance that had been draining him for days finally seemed to drip away with every step closer to the dungeon door. By the time he reached it, a wide smile had spread across his face.

It would be very hypocritical of him not to follow his own advice.

It must have been an hour or so since he left Gabriel chained to the chair. He would feel bad except… okay, no, he didn't. Not at all.

Gabriel was peeved at the sight of him walking in and locking the door. He looked quite a sight. His hair was in disarray, his lips were red and swollen from biting, and so were his fingers and wrist from where he scraped at the cuffs on his arm.

"Hey there sunshine. Nice of you to visit me in the slammer. Are you here to take the collar off or to watch? I can give you one hell of a show." Gabe tucked his free hand around the inseam of his pants and rubbed at his flaccid member. "Tricks for treats."

Sam shook his head and walked around the chair, smirking as Gabe stopped his pathetic goading and twisted to follow his movements. "Cas told me what you said."

"I was drunk! I didn't know what I was saying! I- Wait. What did I say?"

"The big secret," Sam was now the one to tease, throwing his voice to a whisper, "That you're the angel on our shoulder. You actually care. About me and Dean."

"Oh, that. Well, you know how I get when I'm on a sugar rush. And, let's be honest here, your brother's not on the top of that list."

"Mmhmm," Sam laughed. "Just me?" This close up, he caught the tinge of red Gabriel's cheeks turned as he repeated the phrase previously used against him. "I believe the word deeply was used?"

"As deep as you want, big boy."

Gabriel flinched as Sam took a step too quick, too close. "We really should work on putting your mouth to better use."

"I'm listening."

"You should be shutting up."

Gabriel made a show of miming the zipper on his mouth shut, locking it, and throwing away the key.

"That's better."

Out of the corner of his mouth Gabe mumbled, "Even better with an actual gag."

"We'll see."

There.

Sam caught the twinkle of hope from the unexpected comment as Gabriel blinked up, actually keeping his mouth shut another few moments.

Taking advantage of this lapse, Sam squatted to his level and slipped the key out of his pocket. Gabriel was transfixed as he spun it between his fingers, adding more shine to the light in his eyes. "I'm going to let you out."

"What's the catch?"

"You've gotta behave yourself."

"Do I get punished if I don't?"

"You'll get punished anyway." Sam felt a sense of pride rush over him at the amount of lust bursting from Gabriel's greedy eyes. They only seemed to get bigger and rounder as he played with the key, circling it around Gabriel's wrist and teasing the metal resting on scraped skin. He'd seen that look so many times but it was special to see the small twitches and flicks that came with every slide he made against his skin. Gabriel was a horrible example of an archangel but to see something so powerful so hopeful for just one small touch was absolutely thrilling. "You wanted to play a game. I've got one you'll want to play."

Sam watched Gabe's adam's apple bob as he found his voice to ask, "What's the prize?"

"What do you want?"

"You know what I want."

Pig.

"Fine. If you can finish playing without either of us coming, you can get exactly what you want." He curved his hand and grabbed Gabriel's wrist. "Me."

Gabe's wide eyes sparkled as he licked his lips. "What's the game?"

Sam unlocked the cuffs and said, "Skittles."

Like whispering a magic word, the room suddenly filled with piles and piles of the rainbow candy. Sam almost laughed as he leaned over to swipe a few up and pop them into his mouth.

Gabriel tried to follow his lead but Sam raised a hand, keeping him teetering on the edge of his chair.

The tables were about to turn. Gabriel could be a game master but Sam could be too.

Sam continued to chew as he slowly slid himself out of the articles of clothing he wore that day, keeping an eye on Gabriel and warning him to stay in the seat with his glare.

The angel was clearly on the verge of losing it, faced with such temptations. His wild eyes danced over the piles of candy and back to the newly exposed flesh of Sam's body. He could easily read Sam's mind to figure out the game –if he didn't know it already- but for some reason he was letting Sam take his time.

Sam really was commander now. And wasn't that just delicious?

The last tease dangling in front of Gabriel's eyes were Sam's boxers. Fruit of the Loom surrounded by the fruit of the rainbow. The buffet that Gabriel could only long after, waiting to stuff his face.

They put up no fight as he slid them off and tossed them with his other clothes.

Gabriel reached towards the buttons of his own shirt, but Sam shook his head. Surprisingly, Gabe dropped his hands to his lap, neatly framing the erection bursting at his seams.

As strange as it was to understand, the thrill of seeing Gabriel follow his orders -for once- pushed him to continue. He knew he made the right decision and he was going to follow through. He deserved to be happy with someone too.

Even if that someone was an ass.

Sam reached over and pulled more candy into his hand as his other stroked his erection. He popped a few into his mouth and sucked on the sweet treats as he made a show of lowering the rest. Between gasps, he explained. "Add one at a time-," he lowered the candy onto his erection and balanced one at the top of his head. He carefully added another close to the first and then another, trailing the few he had down the length of his shaft. "-until you can't add anymore. If one drops," Sam slipped one off on purpose, "you have to start over," he batted the rest away with a hand sliding up his shaft, the few pulls he added on were purely for his own benefit. "Eat to the base and you win."

"Easy," Gabriel said and instantly slid to his knees. He seemed so excited at mixing his two favorite things –candy and sex- that Sam was willing to forgive him for dropping before he gave him permission.

"Three," Gabriel said. "You forgot you."

"Stop talking," Sam said before he broke into the urge to smile.

"Won't have room to talk in a second. Your trumpet's so big it makes all the sousaphones jealous."

Band jokes?

Sam simply glared and Gabe did another show of zipping his lips -which was pointless because a second later Gabe balanced one Skittle on the top of Sam's head and opened his mouth to eat it up.

Dreams felt real, but reality so was much freaking better. Gabe's hot mouth had him shaking and that was only from a small taste on the edge.

Then Gabe set two side by side. Another swipe from that rough tongue and Sam felt his knees quivering.

A simple wave of air brushed the wet velvety head and the shocks were shockingly strong as they tickled straight down his legs and curled his toes. There was no way he was going to last very long with this mouth enthusiast satisfying his oral fixation. Well, it wouldn't be a game if there wasn't a challenge.

Three was tricky because the curve of his head tilted the round candy. Gabriel grabbed him around the shaft so he could better balance them but Sam slipped out of his grasp -hissing as he felt another rush of pleasure come from Gabriel's hand instinctively closing around his shaft.

"You can only touch me with one hand. The other one should be touching yourself."

"What?"

"I said punished."

Gabriel looked ready to fight again but sat back on his heels and lifted his fingers to snap his clothes away.

"No," Sam said. "No mojo. Take them off by hand."

Gabriel mumbled something unintelligible and started to get up.

"No," Sam said again. "Stay on your knees."

Gabriel looked up again, clearly ready to argue. Sam just smiled and giggled to himself, and yeah, he could admit it, this was fun.

Gabriel struggled to get his jeans off with his knees on the floor but he managed to do it the good old human way and was left kneeling naked, one hand wrapped round his cock, a moan escaping his lips, and three skittles back in his hand.

"No," Sam said again with a passable pitiful expression. "You have to start over."

"Bad boy Sam is mean," Gabriel couldn't help himself saying but tossed two skittles back into the pile and started back at one.

It was undeniably sweet –to watch the angel writhe and moan on the ground as he sucked him into his mouth. There was no arguing, no teasing, just Gabriel fighting the urge to come as he swallowed Sam up -poking his buttons in all the right ways.

The farther Gabriel went, the harder it was for the candy to stay. With only one hand to help them, the Skittles came near falling more than once. Almost every time Gabriel stopped them, but only just. On candy number six, his mouth was the one to knock it to the ground. He growled and used his power to keep the red candy in the air, but Sam said it counted as a fall and Gabriel had to start back at the beginning –much to Sam's amusement.

By then Gabriel was rocking on the edge as much as the candies. His hand was moving slow on his own dick but it was obviously getting harder to keep it at that pace. Sam noticed the moment Gabe stopped stroking and started pinching.

Along with his base came the pinch of his smashed brow, tears prickling at the edges of his eyes. His red face blended into his worn lips and he huffed against Sam's skin every time his knees scraped the ground. When he wrapped his mouth around Skittle number eight -his fingers pinching so tight his bicep shook- he gave such a loud whine that it nearly startled Sam into knocking the candy to the ground.

Of course, Sam wasn't much better off. He was moaning and groaning just as horribly, trembling in his place. Gabriel was stalling, licking around and around so he could get away with pinching some more before having to go back to stroking again. Those breaks did nothing for Sam's will. His body was climbing and his heart was leaping, and he couldn't hold on much longer. It was his own fault for trying to hold on.

"Mmm I'm going to-"

Gabriel popped off and reached for another handful. "Want me to stop?"

"No. No don't- don't stop." Sam hissed through his teeth and forced himself to stand still. "Unless you're afraid you'll lose."

Gabriel didn't have time for a sarcastic remark. He was too busy ignoring the oncoming waves of pleasure as he anticipated finishing. The game or himself –Sam couldn't be sure. He didn't quite care. Either way, he knew his fate.

Gabe kept playing until a line of skittles rested from the head to base of Sam's dick. In one long sweep he lapped them up and gobbled them into his mouth, a long trail of vibrant colors left behind.

"I got them!" He shouted with his mouth full and jumped off the ground, leaving Sam to tremble in his place. "All of them! I have tasted the rainbow! I win. Now," he spun back to Sam and beamed. "My prize."

Gabriel grabbed him from behind the head and greedily thrust a sugar-coated tongue past his teeth. They were both thrumming on anticipation and sped through their kiss, biting and moaning, and rubbing together.

Then Sam felt a tug and Gabriel twisted him around, pushing him to the ground and just stopping him short of smacking against concrete with a flick of his wrist.

The candies that lined the curve of the pentagram poked his back as Gabriel pressed into hi. With minor warning, the angel lifted himself up and slammed himself down, piercing himself onto Sam's slick, multi-colored cock. In the one quick movement, Sam gasped as he was engulfed, the heat overtaking, so much –too much. Too much, too much!

He cried out as his body shook and he groaned at the release he was suddenly rewarded, every inch of him tingling with the pleasure that could only come from coming. Coming inside Gabriel for the first time.

"That's it?!" Gabriel yelled at Sam's slack, satisfied face. "I've been waiting and-"

"It's been six days!" Sam argued back, the embarrassment settling in as he finally caught his breath. Though, to be fair, it had been six days and led into with one hell of a long blow job. Who would expect him to last long after that? And who the hell cared? He felt great!

"We didn't even get anywhere! I knew you were always quick on the draw kiddo, but in the bedroom? I had higher expectations."

The embarrassment quickly flooded into anger, "You're such a dick."

"Don't talk about dicks when yours is tickling my goodies. Now hurry up and get it up. I can't wait to ride you-"

Sam gripped him by the hips and lifted him off his body, tossing him to the ground at his side. "I can."

For as much of an idiot Gabriel was… yup, he was an idiot.

"Hey!"

"You know," Sam pushed up and started to tug his clothes back on, shoving away the candies that clung to his skin. "You really have been a real jerk lately."

"Compared to when? Normally? _Hello_ , have you met me?"

Sam waited until his shirt draped over his chest to glare at the angel dickhole, naked with cum dripping down his thigh. If he weren't so mad, his following statement would have sounded like a joke, "I don't want to have sex with you."

"Sammy!" Gabe was clearly horrified as he crawled to him and tugged on his pant leg. "You don't know what you're saying! The orgasm hit you too hard."

Sam kicked him off and pulled his pants back on, "I don't think you deserve it."

"What? You want me to apologize? Here!" Gabe pushed up to his knees and sat on his heels. "I'm on my knees! Begging you, please!"

Sam shook his head, "I want you to mean it."

"Hey! I can mean it! I'm sorry! I'm sorry you're so touchy about your dick being touched!" Sam left him in the sea of candy as he navigated out the door just barely hearing him mumble, "To think I was gonna let Dean win."

"Jackass," Sam said aloud, just in case Gabe wasn't reading his mind.

_JACKASS!_


	8. Day 7 - It Takes Two to Tango

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Life is cruel. Life is mean. Life is having no internet for a month. Etc, etc.
> 
> Thank you for your patience and general butt kicking and may this chapter bring a smile to your lovely face :)

"Hey, Cas!" Gabriel jumped into action the moment he saw his baby bro heading for the library. "Cassie, baby! C'mere! I needa talk to ya!" Cas spun around and Gabriel popped a squat on one of the wooden chairs, kicking another and patting the empty seat. "Come, sit, sit, sit."

"What is it?" Cassie sighed but he couldn't resist Gabriel's charming...-er- charm.

"Nothing bad! I promise! See-" Gabriel ran his hands over his exposed arms, "Short sleeves, no tricks up them."

"What do the length of your sleeves have to do with the tricks you do?"

"Exactly! Now sit," Gabriel hit the chair again and Cas finally sat down. "I wanna ask you something." Cas seemed oodles less excited than Gabe felt but he plowed on through anyway, "You love me right? Or whatever we angels call love without murder."

"Of course."

"Well brother, I need you to do me a favor." He paused but Cas stubbornly refused to join him in sitting on the edge of his seat. "I need you to make Dean lose."

"Lose?"

Rolling of the eyes just wasn't enough sarcastic power. Gabe rolled his whole head. "The contest, Cassie, the contest."

"And make Dean…Why?"

So much innocence for an angel so…okay so he wasn't _that_ old. Still, for a being that once compared itself to the Chrysler building, he sure did lack a certain appreciation for the male genitalia.

Gabriel checked his six and tried to keep his voice down, making sure the Winchesters weren't about to overhear this teany tiny –totally unimportant- confession. "Because I'm losing it, smalls. Moose meat dangling everywhere. I can still feel that push pop pushing all the right buttons. I need to get him back for the tease and run and I can only do that by getting the full pot of gold at the end of that rainbow nightmare. Which is where you come in. Dean needs to lose. As in yesterday."

Cassie's eyebrows strained in that _confused-as-a-cucumber_ way. The annoyingly adorable vegetable said the obvious, "Bobby comes today. Can you not last until then?"

"And what if by some joke of a miracle -that I did not perform- Dean manages to make it through the day? We can't both win!"

"Why not lose yourself?"

"Ha!" Gabriel laughed so hard his wings brushed the ceiling. Now that. That was a good one. He slapped his brother's arm. "That's funny. Yeah, okay, look who's joking now." He snorted one last time and patted Cassie's head like the funny little puppy he was. "No, seriously, I'll help you out. Whatever you want. And when I win I can made Dean do anything you want. Anything." His eyebrows raised and wiggled with each added syllable. "An-ny-a-thing."

"I don't know." Cassie looked down at his lap, his fingers winding together. "I believe this is cheating."

"Wasn't in the rules! So, name your price."

"Um…" Cassie really drew out that pause, like a glossophobe trying to give the Presidential Address on sex ed -but less hilarious.

Gabe huffed and started to dip into his brother's brain, trying to catch a glimpse of something that would help him convince his little bro of the righteous path. Being his. Which was NOT cheating.

"There, I saw something!" Gabriel jumped over, his hands winding into the sides of Cassie's coat as he tried to get a better read on the thoughts in his little human mind. "What is it?"

Cassie's face turned sour.

A sour cucumber? Lemon? Lemon. Many lemons. Many small, fruity, yellow lemon Skittles burning the tip of his tongue and sliding against the velvety head of – Okay, whoa. No. Stupid Sam.

Cas coughed, "As you know, I've been learning about a new aspect of the human way of life and to do that I've viewed many … documentaries online."

Documentaries?

Gabe snorted again. "Porn? This is about porn? I'll give you all the porn you want!" He shoved himself back in his chair, flipped his feet on the table and opened his arms. A plethora of DVDs and VHSs covered the table in front of them, everything from _'Lesbos Island'_ to _'Chip and Dale and Friends_ '. "Name your flavor."

"If you win… I would like it if uh…" Cassie's face shifted to tomato red –Vegetable? Fruit? Ah, screw it- and he looked over the videos, his eyes growing wider with every cover photo. "I have viewed a few videos with uh…" He tapped a few here and there, his thoughts coming in clearer even though his voice did not. "There is one thing that… uh… I find… interesting and…uh…"

"Ooooh, I get ya Cassie." Gabriel laughed and swiped his hand, making the pornos disappear. "Consider it done. Wrapped up in a pretty pink bow."

* * *

Dean stared at the clock in the kitchen. It ticked slowly, the second hand pinging every bit of the way. He tried to call Bobby but he didn't answer. He didn't know when he would get there, but it had to be soon. He was half hard just thinking about getting away from this stupid contest and being able to get off. Then he could make sense of the rest of the shit that had been going on. He could get back at Gabe for being a dick, yell at Sam for losing to him, and sort out Cas' confusion with one good, long, hard…

Fuck, he needed to get out of there. Two minutes had passed in the last half hour.

That's it. He needed to find Sam. And quick.

Sam was in his room, thank god. Just bouncing a ball off the ceiling and catching it in his hand. Over and over. God that was annoying. "Sammy!"

Dean startled him and the ball collided with Sam's gigantic forehead. "Ah! What?!"

Dean sat on the edge of the bed and dodged the ball hurdling in his direction. "Look, I don't know how to ask you this so I'm just gonna go ahead and say it. I need you to make Gabriel lose."

"What?"

Dean made a wild gesture that he hoped didn't look like too much of anything suggestive. His wrist had a mind of its own ever since he cut it off from the fun stuff. It wanted to play and whacked away, even if it was just air.

Dean groaned, "I know about you two doing whatever and that's all you and that's fine. I, unlike some people, know to keep private stuff private. But uh- " He groaned again and rubbed his hands over his face, "I can't take it man. I can't. Physically. As in I physically cannot-"

"I can see. Dude, you are literally humping the air."

"I am-" Dean dropped his gaze to his hips and forced them to stop trying to find friction against his jeans. "I am not."

"Yeah," Sam scoffed. "Okay."

"Just, I don't know, woo him."

"Woo? Him?"

"Or whatever the hell you kids are into. Just make him lose."

Sam's face scrunched, "Kinda an awkward request here."

"Weren't you telling me to go screw Cas yesterday?"

"I wasn't telling you to screw him. I was telling you to talk to him."

"Well I'm telling you to _talk_ to Gabriel."

"Why should I?"

"Cus," Dean nodded enthusiastically, "When I win I'll make him do whatever you want."

Dean eagerly awaited as he let that sink in. He could see Sam's devious mind working on something.

_That's it, Sammy. Take the bait._

"Hmmm," Sam hummed and pushed out of bed.

"Think about it." Dean stood up too. "You could make the archangel Gabriel –that dick of a prankster- do anything you wanted. Like feed one of those third world countries you go on about or give you cruise tickets. Two! So I can go too. And no liquor cap! The Bahamas, man. Two words, nudist beaches." Dean found his enthusiastic wiggle only created a problem with the whole humping the air thing and as an afterthought added, "No kinky stuff. I don't wanna know about that shit."

"Okay." Sam agreed a bit too easily and opened the door for Dean. "Deal. I'll go talk to him."

"Thanks man." On the way out Dean adjusted and Sam averted his eyes by glaring at the ceiling.

"We have a strange relationship," Sam said.

"Yeah, we sure do."

The sooner Sam _talked_ to Gabriel, the sooner he could _talk_ to Cas, and the sooner they could all have nice long conversations with themselves behind locked doors.

* * *

In order to make Dean lose, Gabriel said Cas would need to seduce him.

Actually, his exact words were first, _"Hold him down and ride that bull til the timer explodes!"_

Cas asked him to clarify, and he did, but left before Cas could ask what seducing entailed exactly. He had a general idea, watched movies before, but he wasn't sure such tactics would work on Dean. Especially since Dean seemed so mad at him.

There was only one way to find out.

First, he needed to find Dean and make a conversation in order to complete Stage One. He had trouble finding him, again, -probably another round of hide-and-go-seek where Dean was ignoring the rules-, but after an hour of searching, and one ignored olly-olly-oxenfree, he opened the right door and found him in the closet.

The one filled with weapons.

Dean seemed very distracted. His back was to the door with his head resting on the wall and he was grunting a lot. Perhaps he was feeling sick again.

"Dean?"

Dean spun around looking flushed and feverish as ever. He had a hand down his pants and the other gripping tight to the wall. Perhaps his stomach was hurting again and that's why he gripped so tightly to his abdomen. He did seem to be in a lot of pain there lately. Not that he would admit it. He was too stubborn to get help for such things.

Dean opened his mouth to say something but all that came out was a strangled moan, the words slowly forming coherency, "Jesus fuck, Cas. Don't say my name. You almost made me- just- don't. Don't do that."

"Are you alright?"

"I'm fucking fine." Dean did not seem fine but he took his hand out of his pants and stood straight. "What do you want?"

"Lovely weather we're having," Cas said, suppressing a smile.

Dean's face warped in what appeared to be more pain, "What?"

"I said the weather is lovely."

"Cas, we're locked in the fucking bunker. No one knows what weather we're having."

"Oh. Right." Cas shook his head and pressed on. "Would you like to eat lunch together? I will cook."

"Um…"

"I will see you at one. I can pick you up."

"Pick me up? From where? What is this about?"

"You'll see," Cas smiled and walked away. This was going perfectly. At one he would take Dean out of the closet and show him a good time.

Stage Two of the plan was improvised because Cas had not expected to find Dean so… unraveled. The sweat dripping down his forehead and curling around those smirking lips raised a predicament in Cas' pants. He would not be able to cook properly with Little Cas begging for a bite. If that truly was the saying. A bite of what, Cas wasn't quite sure –Dean never explained what he meant when he said the phrase the first time.

He hoped it couldn't actually bite.

After Stage Two had been lathered in lotion, rinsed, and repeated, Cas dressed in his favorite suit and prepared for his date with Dean.

At one o'clock, he did not need to take Dean out of the closet because he showed up on his own, mumbling about needing to get back to his room.

"You were supposed to let me pick you up," Cas pouted.

"I…sorry?" Dean looked very confused until he saw the plate of spaghetti sitting on the table. He grabbed the plate and started to turn but Cas stopped him before he could go.

"You will sit and eat in here." Cas led him to the next room, ignoring his arguments about needing to get back to his room again, and sat him in the wooden chair. In front of it was a deep red placemat surrounded by a glass of wine, bowl of bread, and a single white candle. Just as the movie instructed.

"Ughhhh-"

"Sit," Cas pushed Dean into the chair and sat opposite him, watching as Dean slowly lowered the plate towards the table. Cas nodded along, letting him know he was doing the right thing, and continued to do so as Dean tentatively picked up one of the seven forks laid out and stuck it in his spaghetti. He even mimed to help Dean along when he forgot to twirl in order to wrap the strings around his fork. It was alright. If he still felt a bit ill, he could forget such things. Hopefully he wasn't too ill or they might not make it to the final stage, Stage Twenty-Four.

After a very silent meal, Dean seemed awestruck and his eyes were wide- which meant Stage Three must be working.

Cas pulled him to a standing position and walked him back to his room, much to Dean's confusion. "Uh, Cas, what's going on?"

Cas stopped in front of Dean's door and took both hands into his own. Dean tried to pull back but Cas was adamant in holding onto them. They were moving onto Stage Four. Romantic compliments. "Your eyes are the color of a forest after it rains."

"My what?"

"Your voice sounds like silk running over velvet."

"Uh- Cas?"

"Your touch is like a steel pipe. Or perhaps it is a ball. Do you hold the pipe and ball?"

"What the hell are you doing?"

Cas tilted his head and raised his eyebrows, giving a coy smile.

Dean was still lost, "What are you doing with your eyebrows?"

"Goodnight, Dean." Cas leaned in quick and pecked him on the lips, spinning away.

"It's not night. And what the hell was that?!"

Cas went to clear away his dishes with a smile on his face. He was very good at this seducing. Even better than Dean, dare he say, since his companion seemed so befuddled in his lust for him.

His confidence was distracting and he didn't see an out of breath Gabriel running into the room until he was grabbed around the shoulders. "Cas!"

"What?"

"How's it going with Dean?"

"I am about to make an offering." Stage Five. "I just have to decide what it is. Are roses too predictable? The man in- "

"Great, good, fine, but you need to step it up. I've got little Winchester on my ass and I mean that literally. I'm getting crusty and my patience is wearing thin. You needa bed him now."

"But if I am to seduce him-"

"Forget the seducing! No need to play it up, he's about ready to explode. All he needs is a push. So push! Shake'n'bake. Get naked. Sit and spin. Anything! Remember what you get in return!" Gabriel ran away before Cas could ask for clarification.

If only everyone would stop speaking in riddles.

Perhaps then he would understand Dean a bit better. Then he could get him to do the things he had been dreaming about for the past week without needing this multi-stage plan.

With that, Cas left to revisit Stage Two again.

* * *

"Hi Cas! Bye Cas!" Sam ran right past Cas and after Gabe. The pipsqueak angel had been avoiding him all morning.

After Dean made his request, Sam took some liberty in his fantastic decision to forfeit early and laid back to enjoy a victory jerk off. And then another victory lap, because he could. It was for his fans –Righty and Like a Stranger. Then he ended up taking a well-deserved victory nap.

It was so good to be the loser.

He woke up completely relaxed and not wanting to move an inch, which made him think twice about following through on his agreement. Moving and finding Gabe and trying to sex him, it just seemed like too much work.

Ah, the human condition. Evolution at its best. The chicken was done laying eggs, it just wanted the seeds.

Then he remembered he had nothing to do. Stuck, until Bobby showed. Who knows how long that would be? He tried calling but no one picked up on Bobby's end.

Boredom won out -after another celebration round (someone had to pop the champagne)- and he pushed out of bed to find Gabe.

This would be easier than Gabriel. The hornier-than-thou angel had been crawling all over him for the past week after all. So, he really didn't expect it to be too hard. (Well, he had just come three times.)

Sam wasn't exactly innocent either. All his advances worked. Hell, it was his move that made Gabriel jump and ride him for just that brief moment. Where he could feel his entire cock swallowed up by the greedy ass of a man-whore bent on tearing him apart from the inside-

Okay, yeah, maybe another celebration was in order.

Then again, the hard-on was like candy to the sugar head. He probably had Sam's dick on hard-on radar. Sam expected to just walk out and have an angel ready and begging. Instead, he couldn't find him anywhere.

It was almost as if the little -brother to the- devil was hiding on purpose.

There was one trick he could try. It worked before…

_Gabriel, hear my prayer. Where are you? I'm in my bedroom, where you should be._

Sam peeked an eye open but Gabe wasn't standing in front of him.

To draw out a horse, you need a carrot. To draw out a perv, you need a big carrot.

 _My big, fat_ , -Sam could barely contain his laughter- _monster cock is revving for another go. I bet we can make it past the first lap this time. I just need something to stick my key in. So get your feathery ass over here and have some fun._

"Careful," Gabe's voice rang through the room as he flew inside. "You're starting to sound like your brother."

Sam smirked and dropped his gaze to the party in Gabe's pants. Yeah, he was ready for fun. "But you came anyway. If you stay, you may just come twice."

"How original beastie boy. You're going to have to do a lot better than those empty promises to get me to stick around here."

With blown black eyes and that crack in Gabriel's voice, Sam knew he was off to a good head start. "Come on. I thought you wanted to play." Sam drilled as many dirty images through his brain that he could rattle.

The first one was exactly what Gabe wanted. Sam laid out on his back with his cock ready for Gabe's ass, standing erect and tall, patiently waiting. He threw in a whine, _Please. Gabe, please_. And Gabe lowered onto him, riding him fast and crazy, making him scream the entire way.

The second was Sam's fantasy. He had Gabe bent over the table in the bunker, his scrawny legs near dangling off the side, his hands fisting against the wood –trying to grab onto anything they could. Then he entered him slow, pushing just hard enough to pop in before pulling back –making Gabriel the one to beg, _Sammmmmy. You're killing me. Faster. Please._

The third was something he made up on a spot. They were back in the dungeon, only Gabe wasn't strapped to the chair. He was on his knees in the middle of the sigil, naked with his cock leaking onto the floor. His entire body was a filthy shade of red, trembling as he tried to keep himself up. His head snapped as soon as Sam walked closer, a blindfold keeping him from seeing where he actually stood. Sam smiled, _Good boy._

"Oh," Gabe coughed through a moan and tried -and failed- to make it sound natural and sarcastic. "So now you want to get down and bump uglies? I thought I disgusted you."

"No, never."

"Suck my dick."

Sam's mouth curled into a smirk and he quickly dropped to his knees, "Okay"

"Not literally!"

"Why not?" Sam batted his lashes and pouted in the way Gabriel had always done. "You didn't like any of my ideas?" He slid his hands around Gabe's thighs and watched as he shivered, just as he had done in Sam's fantasy.

Gabe scoffed, but it didn't sound right. "I'm not reading your mind. I don't know what deranged ideas you're spewing out."

"Really?" Sam stood, throwing Gabe off balance and making him stumble into the wall behind him. "Should I show you then?" He trapped Gabriel in with a quick step and wrapped a hand around his chest. He spun him against the wall and pinned him down, his chest pressing against those invisible wings. Sure, Gabe could probably pop out at any second, but not before he felt Sam's hard-on digging into his back.

"You can't-"

"Can't what, Gabe?" Sam pressed harder, moaning aloud when he felt the shock of pleasure zing from the head of his dick to his very toes. Gabe's fingers scratched the paint on the wall but he didn't try to get away from Sam's heat, encasing him at every point.

Sam slid his hands down Gabe's chest and dipped them to his jeans, undoing the button and zip. "Can't make you hard?" Sam dove his hand under the fabric and slid his palm against the erection beating in the angel's boxers.

"Can't make you want it?" He slid his thumbs around the hem and tugged both boxer and jean around Gabe's hips. With a fast hand and quick work of his own jeans, he soon had his hot flesh dipping against Gabe's exposed ass. The moan that reverberated off the wall next to Gabe's mouth was answer enough.

"Can't wait?" Sam slipped Righty back to Gabe's front and took him in hand as Like a Stranger filled the gap by wrapping around his own prick. He pumped them slowly, barely giving them enough to feel anything but a flicker. Still, his knees shook and Gabe's forehead smacked the wall. "Cus I can't wait until I'm inside you again. But I this time, I'll make it last. I can make it last all night if I wanted."

Gabriel barely made a sound of protest. No ' _Oh yeah, like last time'_ or anything. A pathetic whimper, maybe, but nothing more. Angel boy really wanted it and knowing that was driving Sam insane. He switched hands so his dominant took over and fiddled with his left on Gabriel, still moving at a slow pace. All he could picture as he looked down at himself, prepping himself, nearing Gabe's ass, was slipping inside. It would be so easy. Just one quick thrust and he could be ensnared by the Trickster again.

His hand started to move faster. The one on Gabriel paused as he picked up speed with Righty, rounding onto the balls of his feet for better balance as he started to jerk. His hand left Gabe completely and he balanced against the wall, panting as he leaned against the petite body beneath him as he neared the final lap.

With their breaths mingling and the grunts growing louder it didn't take long for the build to clench his entire body, his toes curling into the floor, and he released himself all over Gabriel's back.

Gabe whimpered but before Sam could finish him off as well, he poofed away.

Sam took a moment to breath. With a satisfied grin and a skip in his step, he searched the bunker. He found Gabe nearing the kitchen. When Gabe saw him, he took off running in the other direction.

Off to the races.

That had been the time when they ran past Cas, Gabe screaming and Sam laughing.

Sam chased him until he had him cornered at a dead end. "Where are you flying off to?"

"Go blow, Winchester!"

"I already said I would!" Sam darted and blocked his exit. "I bet your cum would taste good too. Sweet. Like all that candy you eat."

Gabe's smile twitched, "I will get you back, Sammy dearest. For everything. Just you wait. Patience is a virtue."

"That you don't have. So let's fuck already."

"Dirty talk can't save you now. When I say I'm not losing before Dean I actually mean it. The only way you're getting me hogtied and hollering is if you sing your sorrys on your knees after trucker boy pulls in and sends Deany to the sidelines."

Gabe was gone in a pop.

Singing. Flashbacks of middle school choir flew through Sam's head like the reel of an old horror film. Singing was not his forte. It was not his anything. Singing was something reserved for everyone else on the face of the planet.

Sam Winchester did not sing.

The only exception being drunk Sam.

Once, Dean took them out for karaoke and pumped them full of beers. Next thing Sam knew, he was singing along to '[ _Jessie's Girl'_](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qYkbTyHXwbs) with half the bar patrons. On stage. With no shirt. And questionable pants.

The memories were a bit foggy but it was probably better that way.

Gabe probably wasn't being literal but Sam knew how to play his game. Liquid courage had to be somewhere in the bunker.

* * *

Goddammit, Cas was being ridiculous but Dean still got hard as a fucking rock. What even was that? A _date_ or... just... This game was beyond total bogus.

Those few strokes he took in the gun closet nearly killed him. He was cocked, loaded, and ready to blow. Just not blow Cas cus that would lead to…yeah. Had he thought of that already? Damn. Stuck on fantasy bj repeat.

Bobby needed to hurry it the hell up.

He was on his way to finding Sam and kicking his ass into high gear when Cas came popping out of nowhere. Dean stumbled forward and hissed as his body made contact with the wall. "What the hell Cas? Did you just push me?"

"Yes," Cas said before walking past.

"What the hell is your problem?"

Cas ran away before answering.

That was fucking weird.

It only got weirder because when he went around the next corner, Cas was waiting there again, ready to strike. "Dude!" Dean yelled as Cas pushed him into the wall, holding onto him and pressing in tight.

Dean's eyes dropped to the mouth now lingering a few inches away. A mouth he had already felt pressing against his own. Soft. Hot. Wet. Scratchy.

Oh fucking great. Now something was pressing inside his pants.

Cas walked away without commenting on Dean's awkward boner.

Dean managed to make it to Sam's door but little brother wasn't in there. He tried to turn around but Cas was there again, hands poised to push. Dean grabbed him by the wrists and spun him around, tripping him into Sam's bedroom and making him fall on his hands and knees.

"Stop doing that!" Dean yelled.

"I have to," Cas argued back.

"Why?!"

"I'm pushing you."

"Yeah, I know what you're doing. Cut it out!"

Dean stomped away shaking his head. Sam could wait. He needed to put some distance between himself and the Pushmaster 3000.

Cas, landing on his knees like that. What was he thinking? The giant fucking tease.

The shooting range killed some time and some steam but firing loud shots off wasn't the best way to hide. Cas found him and spooked him with his stupid greeting, "Hello Dean."

"Cas!" Dean shouted and lowered the very loaded gun to the ground. "Don't sneak up like that! This is loaded and it can hurt you now!"

"Sorry," Cas sheepishly ducked his head and Dean sighed.

"It's fine." Dean then noticed the small tin in his hands. He sniffed the air and over the gunsmoke he could detect a bit of cinnamon. "What you got there?"

"I baked for you," Cas said and stuck out the tin, unveiling the apple pie underneath.

"Pie?" Dean's mouth watered and he stepped a bit closer.

"Yup," Cas said just as he started to vigorously shake the pie up and down, detaching it from the sides and making it spill over the edge and fall to the floor.

"Whoa!" Dean yelled and ran forward to stop him. Too late. The pie homicide had been committed. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! That's pie, man!"

"I'm shaking. Am I not doing it right?"

"You're… but… but why?"

"Here you go." Cas gave him the pie tin and walked away without another word.

Fucking weird! And wrong!

Dean still ate the pie. Pie is pie is pie. It was pretty good. Not great with the dirt seasoning but hey, he'd take anything now that Gabriel had stopped listening to requests and only handed him a fruit garden salad whenever he asked for something they didn't have. Seriously, who thought lettuce and apples and strawberries were a good combo? His brother had weird taste.

Cas' weird behavior aside, it was still real nice of him. Or whatever. Dean had been pretty mean to the kid. He did make pie. Pie.

He should probably thank him or something.

He found Cas in the library and only managed to say, "Hey-", before Cas jumped up and grabbed him around the shoulders.

Dean's dick was automatically at the ready, betraying him with a large kick that fogged his brain and made him forget to yell at being manhandled.

Then Cas dragged him to a couch that he was pretty sure hadn't existed before. It was full black leather, kinda worn and had no armrests… and was that glitter all over it?

"When I asked Gabriel for this couch," Cas said, "He told me to give you a good show as well as a view. I found _Doctor Sexy_ DVDs. I know you like this show so you will watch it." Cas placed the TV directly in front of the couch and Dean sat speechless as the show came on. "Do you have a good view?"

"Uh-" Dean sputtered and looked around –usually someone knew what the hell Cas was up to. "Yeah. Yeah, I guess."

"Good," Cas smiled and walked away.

What the hell was going on? And why the hell was Dean still hard?

After a few episodes, Dean had enough of his erection. He needed to know if Sam got the job done so he could turn more than just the TV down.

Almost as soon as he turned off the TV, Cas was right there. Waiting. Watching. Creepy son of a bitch.

"Jesus, Cas!"

"Are you done with the view?"

"It wasn't _The View_ , it was _Dr. Sexy_ ," Dean smirked at the joke that went over Cas' pretty little head.

"Sit back," Cas instructed as he moved the TV back to its original spot.

"I've gotta find Sam," Dean said, starting to rise but Cas pushed him back down again. "I thought I told you to stop doing that!"

"Sit still," Cas instructed.

Then things really got really fucking weird.

Cas started jerking around, his body having some kind of seizure on his feet. Dean was about to ask him if he was okay but Cas raised a hand to his lips and silenced him.

Dean looked around again, wondering if there was a camera, if this was a prank or something, but saw nothing.

He turned back to Cas and saw him continue to jerk around as he reached for the edges of his coat. With a few awkward shuffles, the fabric fell from his shoulders and circled around his elbows. Cas shimmied his shoulders forward and stuck out his arms, making the fabric slide down from his body until it caught at his wrists. He continued to jerk around as he pulled off his trench coat and tossed it to the ground at Dean's feet.

Dean's eyes were wide and he looked to his empty hand in confusion. Had he drank a dozen beers and completely forgot? Was this happening? What the _hell_ was happening?

Cas nodded in his direction and reached up for his tie. He tugged it by the end and pulled it up his neck and over his head, only to accidentally tighten it halfway and get it stuck around the middle – giving him a pig nose. With some major flailing and odd oinking noises, he reached to the back of his skull and yanked it back up –only slightly out of breath.

"What-" Dean's question was cut off as Cas threw the tie over Dean's neck and started to reach for the buttons on his dress shirt.

Holy hell. Was this a strip tease? Was this the world's most awkward strip tease?

More awkward than the one he got before?

Dean found he couldn't move as he watched Cas jerk around –what was apparently supposed to be dancing- and pop open button after button. Cas reached his pants before realizing he forgot to untuck his shirt and frantically pulled the tails out, undoing the rest. He tried to shimmy again, pulling it down his arms and getting them stuck on the wrists, having forgotten those buttons.

"One moment," Cas mumbled before picked at the buttons that didn't seem to want to come apart. He mumbled something under his breath and Dean was just about to ask him if he wanted help when the fabric came undone.

Then came the difficulty of getting both his jacket and shirt off at the same time. He somehow managed it and tossed the fabric to Dean's feet.

His undershirt came off easier but it did leave him looking a flustered mess, with his hair sticking up everywhere and his face blushing with his workout.

Dean didn't know what the hell to do. As hilarious as this was, this shit was actually working for him. Of all the strip clubs, of all the girls and others he may have seen, this "dance" and spastic flailing was actually making him hot for Cas. He looked like he was miming that Elaine woman from that one show, but it somehow freaking worked.

Then Cas sat down next to him and untied his shoes, putting them together and tucking them under the couch. "One more moment," he added before picking up his already discarded clothes from the ground.

"Are you folding your clothes?" Dean asked with a laugh.

"Yes," Cas said and put the newly folded clothes over the back of the couch. "Now, back to getting naked."

Fuck. Why did he have to just go and say that so innocently like that?

Cas undid his belt and slacks and threw them off in a hurry, only left in his -Dean's- boxers and his socks. Socks which were promptly removed and tossed into Dean's lap. Dean stared at them for a moment in confusion and slowly picked them up before tossing them far away.

"Thanks, Cas, I guess. But what's the point of-" Dean let the question die as soon as he saw Cas' boxers on the floor, his fully erect body on display.

"The point is this," Cas said and sat on the ground.

"Ughhhhh-" Dean leaned over as Cas started to turn.

Cas sat there.

Naked.

Spinning in place.

* * *

"What are you doing?" Gabriel yelled, just in time to see Cas finishing his first lap, reaching around to make another.

"Sitting and spinning," Cas answered.

"No," Gabe sighed into his hands.

He should have kept a watch on Cas. He had been too busy hiding from cheater-cheater-Sammywiener. That hot dog was made for slipping between Gabe's buns and Sam was lowering himself to boardwalk tricks just to make it happen. Gabe could only say 'you cannot pass go, you cannot collect one hundred dollars' so many times before they both ended up in the jailhouse rattling some bars. Speaking of bars…

Sam, dressed in a cowboy hat and one hell of a pair of freshly cut cutoffs, ran into the room with tequila bottle raised above his head. "Hola! Que es- Fiesta?" He sloppily pointed at Cas with the bottle, silently asking why he was rolling around on the floor naked. Before Gabriel could tell him to go sleep it off in Mexico, Sam ran into the room and started to gyrate to no music whatsovere, taking another shot of liquor and reaching into his pocket for a slice of lemon that he shoved between his teeth.

"Gabe!" He shouted, louder than he needed to –muffled by the fruit. "C'mere! I needa lick the salt off your neck!"

"Dude, are you drunk?" Dean asked from the couch -his Neanderthal mouth hanging open.

"No. Yes. Maybe." He spit out the lemon, which bounced off Cassie's head as he spun around again. "Don't judge me," Sam gulped down another sip and started to trace those massive hands down that massive chest and make his way the massive erection pressing on those puny jeans.

"Dude!" Dean yelled and covered his eyes as Sam unbuttoned. The direction he looked just so happened to be Gabriel's and was it really his fault for having a hard-on? Sammy was stripping! "Dude!" Dean yelled at him anyway.

"Dude!" Gabe yelled back, pointing at Dean's erection. Dean covered his lap with what appeared to be Cas' boxers.

"Dude!" Sam yelled to the air and tossed his jeans to the corner. Only now the boxers lay flat over his flaccid member. Ah, whiskey dick. True of tequila as well.

Cas asked from the floor, "Why are we saying dude? Is this a part of it?"

"Wait!" Sam wasn't done. "Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait!" Sam bent over, dropping the bottle on the way, picked up Cas and threw him next to –but mostly on top of- Dean. "Okay?! Shut up. I got this. I got this. Just, wait. I'm- I'm gonna-" He sank down on both knees and opened his arms to Gabriel, starting to sing the opening lines of '[ _Baby Come Back_](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hn-enjcgV1o)', "Spending all my nights, all my money, going out on the town."

Gabe sighed, "For the love of boy bands."

"Doing… something… off my mind… and, shit I forgot the middle," Sam picked up the bottle and took another pounding from the liquor, "Baby come back! Any kind of fool could see-"

Just heard over Sammy's belting, Cas yelled into Dean's ear. "Let us fornicate now."

"You… forni…. What?!"

"I have seduced you. Let's go."

"That's what this was about?!" Dean snapped to Gabriel, the idiot having figured something out for once. "You cheater! Using your brother like that."

Sam stopped singing a moment to say, "You did the same thing Dean."

"Shut up, Sam!"

"Baby come back! You can blame it all on me!"

Gabriel smirked and gestured at Cas, still laid out naked as the day he was created. "Go on Deanariono. Take your tiny dancer to bed and get it over with."

Dean glared and pushed Cas off his lap, who climbed straight back on.

"Okay," Sam said as he rose from the floor, apparently having finished his song. "I did it. Now do me."

Gabe pinched his rosey cheeks, "Sorry kiddo. You're too hammered for me. I wouldn't want the big bro to think I was taking advantage. Isn't that right, Deany?"

"Come on Gabe," Sam slurred, grabbing him by the shoulder. "Let's just go back to the dungeon and- and- bring the washer down and- strawberrieeeeeeeeeees! And ugh-" All that lumberjack weight sagged onto Gabriel, only his grace keeping him standing as the tree started to sway. "Oh god- I mean I'll have you saying- oh, god I need to throw up."

Sam ran away and Gabe wrinkled his nose, "I really hope not."

"No, Sam. Sammy! Don't you dare!" Dean pushed Cas off him again and ran after his brother. Gabe stuck out a foot and tripped him on the way out. Just for kicks.

"What did you do, Cassie?" Gabe asked once they were alone. "I told you to sweep him off his feet, not sweep the floor with it. Yes to the ass but no to the use."

"I was doing what you said. Pushing, Baking and shaking. I gave him the show he liked and a good view of it. And I got naked before sitting and spinning. It should have worked."

Oh, the poor kid. Gabriel kicked himself in his stupid perky butt and tisked at his naïve little brother, "You need to do it right amigo. You're gonna do it my way." He dipped down and picked up Sam's disposed liquor, taking a large swig for himself. "Let's revisit those oh-so educational documentaries."

* * *

'Twas the week of no wanking, and all through the bunker

All cocks were stirring, except maybe one drunkard's.

Sammy was hung as Gabe was aware,

Hoping again his ass would sit there.

Dean was restless tucked away in his bed,

Visions of naked Cas dancing in his head.

Sam had on only his cowboy cap,

Wondering if this hangover would soon pass with a nap.

Cas planned on the porno matter,

And how to be served on a silver platter.

Away they all stayed knowing they'd be snobby,

The question on all their minds: WHERE THE HELL IS BOBBY?!


	9. Day 8 - Dean's Dilemma

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU WON'T GET HERE TILL TOMORROW?!"

"Are you drunk, boy?" Bobby yelled at Dean through the phone. "I mean tomorrow! The day after today. As in when the sun rises above that big, fat head of yours."

"Yeah, okay fine," Dean just barely restrained himself from slamming the phone onto the floor and following up with the edge of his boot. "Whatever Bobby."

"See you then." Bobby hung up.

Dean mimed smashing the phone down while swearing on the top of his lungs but it didn't really help. It also didn't really help that the phone slipped from his fingers and went crashing into the wooden table. The stupid battery popped out and went sliding under a cabinet. Why could they never have nice things?

"I think you're the reason Mr. Anger Management," Gabe strolled into the room eating a strudel, slapping him upside the head and leaving a trail of sticky lemon goo in his hair. "What'd papa bear say?"

"You got shit in my hair, asshole."

"Did he really say that? Who did he spend the night with?" Even Gabriel stumbled under Dean's death glare. Or at least mumbled over his breakfast. "Oh, quit your whining. Gives you an excuse to take another shower." He sniffed the air and cringed. "And you need one."

"And what you need is an attitude adjustment."

"Attitude adjustment? What are you, my mom?"

"Gabe." Sam warned as he stumbled into the room –a bottle of Advil and a glass of water in hand. "Dean. Shut up. Just…shut the hell up." He slumped into his chair and dug out a couple of pills while holding the glass to his forehead.

"What's the matter Sammy?" Dean teased. "We're just talking." He raised his voice just enough to watch Sam's face twitch in pain. "Would you prefer it if we started shouting?"

Serves him right for bailing on that fucking weird ass thing the night before.

"No." Sam gulped and pushed his hands over his eyes. "No yelling. No talking. No…anything."

"What about singing?" Gabe teased. "If you give me a little _[Boyz II Men](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fV8vB1BB2qc)_ , I promise I'll make love to you." Gabe elbowed him in the side, making him moan in pain. "Like you want me to."

Sam cradled his head in his arms and whined, "Why don't you just heal me or something?"

"And give drunk Sammy another crack at the whip? I don't think so."

Sam groaned and was only just able to lift his eyes to Dean. "What'd Bobby say?"

"He'll be here tomorrow," Dean growled. "Something about a ghost in a schoolhouse. Some hunter fucked it up and now there's more than one. I don't know. I don't care."

"Another day to slip up," Gabe raised his brows. "Think you can make it?"

"What I think is that this bullshit is over with. We said a week. It's been a week."

"Nuh-uh-uh," Gabriel wiggled his finger back and forth. What Dean wouldn't give to snap it off. "We said till trucker daddy gets back."

Sam groaned with his forehead resting on the edge of the table. "He is right, Dean."

"He is right, Dean," Dean mocked in a high-pitched whine. "This is bull. Where's Cas? He can call."

"Yeah," Gabe hummed and stood to exit. "Where is that dancing diva? You better go find him before the little guy wears himself out."

Well, Dean didn't trust that statement more than he could throw it -or Gabe. Then again, it'd been a while since he tried to throw the tiny angel. He could give it another go. There was enough room in the basement for a throw down. Cheating would be an issue. The issue being Gabe had no issue with it. Not that Dean couldn't take him even with the cheating, but he was going with The Beat Down as plan B. Plan A, The Beat Off, was still on the table… half passed out.

Dean waited till Gabriel was out of the room to yell at Sam. "You need to suck it up and suck him off."

Sam's glazed eyes just barely lifted from his arm. "I've thrown up twice this morning. That doesn't exactly scream come and get me."

"Then actually scream it."

"No way man. I tried. It didn't work. I am done. I'm going to bed and lying down." He sloppily pushed up from the table and added, "And _sleeping_. It's not worth it."

"Sam-"

"Go away, Dean."

"Sam, stop. Sam!" Dean chased him all the way to his bedroom but the big baby slammed the door in his face. "Son of a bitch."

A few hours of clock glaring later and it was time for plan B.

"Gabriel! Get your annoying ass over here!" Dean screamed until the angel popped back in front of him. "Me. You. Basement. Now."

"Why, Dean," Gabriel stumbled back with a hand dramatically flung over his heart. "You're so forward! What about your Cassie muffin?"

"My what muffin?"

"I'm sorry Deanarino but I'm not interested in being tossed over the hood of a car while my poor baby bro waits down the hall. At least not by you, little Winchester."

Dean kinda felt like joining his brother in the throwing up department. "You're disgusting."

"You're the one that came crawling to me wanting to play chicken cock."

"Chicken cock?"

"A little circle jerk?" Gabe went ahead and mimed that, which was super annoying and not necessary. Kinda like a regular mime. "Hot hands? Frenzy fuck? The final round-can't take it anymore-overtime-push to the finish-whoever reaches checkers first loses? You just can't take it can you? You can't wait just one more day. You have to settle it now by watching me get my rocks off or do it yourself. No way man. You're the one that's disgusting."

"What?!" There was that baby vomit creeping up his throat, threatening projectile. "No! I meant fight!" Dean punched his hand –now the one miming. "We should go fight, fist to fist, man on man. Not man _on_ man."

"That's a lot of testosterone you got pent up there." Gabe skipped forward, wiggling those detachable eyebrows. "I think I'll put the lid on and let you simmer before I beat your gargantuan ass. But hey, check in on Cassie. I'm sure he's up for a round. Or maybe a roll around."

"What does that-" Gabriel popped away before Dean could finish asking, "-mean."

Dean hadn't seen Cas since the night before –except in his dreams- and it was probably better that way. The things he had Cas doing in his late night fantasies would bring a blush to anyone's face. Hopefully Cas'. A full body blush that rendered him a shy, pleading mess.

How did he get here? How did he get it this bad for an ex-angel with the sexual know-how of a potato chip? This stupid contest was so…stupid. It was wrecking him. Another day? How the fuckity fuck was he supposed to last another day?! This was supposed to be it. He was supposed to be jacking it by now. Headphones on, pants off -Sunday afternoon spent right.

Instead, he was locking himself in his room for the millionth time with the intention of finding the unsexiest thing in the world and staring at it for twelve plus hours. Picturing Gabriel naked worked pretty damn well. Picturing him full clothed worked pretty damn well too. Sam had weird taste.

Not that Dean could judge. His pie-murdering, spastic dancer was wandering around the bunker's halls somewhere. Probably doing something weird like corn shucking or poetry reading or the hokey pokey or- NOT.

Not at fucking all.

Dean froze in the doorjamb to his room. Both his door and his mouth hanging wide open.

Cas was not wandering the halls doing something weird. He was in Dean's bed. Doing something beyond weird. It was- was- was-

"Hello, Dean."

Fucking awesome.

Cas had all parts out, turning himself around. He was on his knees, in the nude, spread out like a bacon themed dinner buffet. The appetizer was that cocky smile lopping up the side of his panting face. Followed by a course of shining skin pulled over taut muscles, stretching as his body rocked. Rocking was the main dish because he wasn't just rocking to the beat of imaginary tunes like his seizure from the night before. No. He was rocking back and forth, thrusting himself into the palm of his hand –each buck revealing a few inches of shiny purple dildo splitting him open.

Cas might have snorted or laughed or moaned, it was hard to tell when he was panting so hard, his body making the springs on the bed screech. Or maybe that screech came from Dean.

"C-Ca-C-C-" Oh no, that was just stuttering. "What're- what- wha- what?"

"Dean, I've been doing a lot of research on penetrative sex between two males."

"Holy fuck."

"I was an angel, so that is the idea." Cas paused to twist his hand to get a better angle. "And I believe I understand, but I would like to try it with a partner. With you."

"Cas I-" _Goddammit._ "You can't just-" _Goddamn_. "You-" _Dammit_. "I can't- I really can't-"

"Can't or won't?"

"Did you just use that fucking line?" The face-palm was immediate. "Fucking hell."

"I believe you are going in the wrong direction." Cas paused and felt the need to explain, "Holy would imply heaven, meaning me or another angel. Though Gabriel is the only other angelic being here and I don't believe you or he-"

"I said fist to fist! Not fisting!"

"-would be interested. Hell would imply Lucifer. As he is stuck in a cage that would not be possible. Besides, I do not believe intercourse with the devil would be-"

"Yeah, yeah, I get it-"

"Unless you meant Crowley. In which case I must also disagree with your choice of-"

"No, Cas. I get it. I just meant-" Another face-palm felt right. It didn't help jog him back to reality. Cas was still there MASTURBATING ON HIS BED looking all fuckable and begging and goddammit all to hell. But not to Lucifer or Crowley or ah- son of a bitch. "I meant nothing- I just. I just can't. I mean- I can't."

"I know you may feel you are taking advantage of me because I am new to this but let me assure you that I am very interested and ready. I believe I am old enough to make the decision. I have done all I can do on my own." He started up his rocking once again as if to prove his point. "And I want to do more. With you. I want you."

"Cas-" Dean squeaked again. "I can't-"

"Of course." Cas slowed down to a full stop and held himself in place. It was a horrible sight to see. Like getting to the actual bacon plate and seeing only crumbs left behind. Tiny, delicious burnt pieces just waiting to be licked up. Cas spoke over Dean's lusting whimper, "After you win this contest with Gabriel. I can wait. I have been waiting."

Dean's hand slipped across the door, another unidentifiable noise slipping between his lips. Cas moved but he wasn't stopping with his rock. He slid off his knees and collapsed onto his back, spreading his legs and taking his hands away, showing Dean every bit of that dessert.

The purple dildo's flat, black end was slipping without Cas supporting it- his tight hole pushing it slowly out of his body. His pucker was red from having been abused, a deep blush rushing out to his quivering legs. That thick dick was standing straight above the scene –as if it were nothing but an innocent bystander to the mouthwatering display.

All laid out right there. For the taking. For Dean's taking.

The only thing that stopped him from rushing right over and ripping the fabric of his jeans with his bare hands –and a little extra help from his frustratingly hard as steel dick- was Cas moving his fingers under his legs and blindly grabbing the end of the dildo again, slowly pushing it back in. His eyes twitched, his forehead crinkled, and his mouth pulled open as he gasped in pleasure.

"Can you shut the door?" Cas panted.

Shit. Right. Door.

Dean looked behind himself, glad no one else was watching this, and quickly shut it behind him.

Cas made another noise that could have been a laugh, "I believe you once told me the point was to get outside the door and shut it."

"Ugh-" Dean looked at the door behind him wondering why the hell he thought it was a good idea to lock himself in this room anyway.

"It's fine," Cas said. "You can stay."

"I can't-"

"Your mouth is open too."

Dean quickly clamped his mouth shut again.

It fell right back open as Cas shifted again, slowly pulling the dildo out of his body. Inch by inch he saw it now. A slick little thing, smooth along all edges –shining in the dim light overhead. It was wider at the base and slimmed to a rounded head. That head slipped out with the tiniest of pops. It wobbled there, just barley grazing the access point, tracing circles around Cas' entrance. After a bit more teasing –where every pass made his hips quake- he finally slipped it back in, his body jerking up into the air.

"Come here," Cas gasped.

Dean could actually feel his legs giving out -shaking like he was the one taking it in the ass. His knees pulled too sharply and he had to grip the wall to keep himself from falling on the fallen angel. He moved, slowly but surely toward his own bed.

What the hell was going on? This was Cas. Bumbling, innocent, potato chip Cas! Since when was he the one giving the orders? Since when was he the one tempting Dean like a wanton whore? Since when was Dean one to listen to such obvious attempts at seduction?

Gabe put him up to this. There was no way Cas already had a purple playmate waiting in his bedside table. Unless he did... NO. It was dick face Gabriel. It was part of the game. But Dean could play too.

He was pretty sure.

Maybe.

He made it to the bed and stood, watching over Cas as he had the first time he watched him masturbate. Cas wasn't messing around now. This wasn't a gasping, needy haste where he wrapped his hands around himself and frantically struggled to the finish. This was deliberate. Slow. Cas was even staring up at him, their dark eyes locking as he licked his lips.

Dean cleared his throat but his voice still caught, "You're very- um- good. At that. For a noob."

Cas' mouth curved into a smirk as he twisted the dildo around, his body curving against the mattress. "I've been practicing."

Dean was pretty sure he could come up with something witty to say to that but all that came out of his mouth was, "Y-yeah."

"Touch me."

Dean's fingers twitched and his hands swung at his sides. He was suddenly very aware of the fact that he didn't know what to do with them. He forced them into his pockets. Great, now he had a double case of awkward pocket surrounding inconvenient bulge number three. "I can't."

"So you keep saying."

"Dude, this isn't-"

"I've been waiting for you to touch me again," Cas continued as he continued to fuck himself open. "I've been thinking about it constantly. I need you to put your hands on me. I need you to wrap your fingers around my genitalia and perform the necessary actions to make me orgasm. I need it. I need you. Dean."

That was the closest to dirty Cas' talk had ever been. Dean coughed and pushed his hands further inside his pockets. Man, they were itching to perform necessary actions. "Since when have you had such a mouth on you?"

"Since I met you. I can use my mouth on you too, if you like." Cas stopped on the spot and tilted his head to the side. "Is that right? I think that was in the documentaries. Is that what I'm supposed to say? I can't think-" He swallowed audibly and resumed rocking. "Can't think straight."

"Join the club." With this new image to keep him company on his loneliest nights, Dean wouldn't be thinking a straight thought for the rest of his life.

"Deeeeean, please." Cas whined and reached for Dean's hand. Most of him landed on jeans but Dean could still feel the pull of those slippery fingers. "I don't need to think of someone I like touching me, you're right here. Please."

"Dammit, Cas." Dean wanted to scream be careful what you wish for. His wishing sure as hell got him into one giant pickle. One very long, thick, giant pickle.

Since when had Dean not taken the pickle? …wait, no. He didn't want to take the pickle. He wanted to give it but….uh….he wanted to play with Cas' pickle? Oh screw the pickle. But with his hands not…up his…for the love of god. He wanted the fucking pickle.

Dean's hands ripped from his pockets so fast he tripped and slammed his shins into the side of the bed. He wrapped his hand roughly around Cas' shaft and started those actions with a squeeze. Dean pulled his hand up and twisted it around, easily sliding around the head of Cas' cock with the ease of previously applied lube. That explained the smell of strawberries. Cas' dick was rub'n'sniff. Not that he was sniffing...ah fuck.

Dean's voice came out gruff, "You like that?"

"Mmmmhmm," Cas moaned and his body shook again, his hands clawing at the bedspread as the dildo slipped all the way from his body.

Now that Dean was closer it became quite clear that there was a power button located along the bottom edge. It had settings that shifted from a zero to three marked lines. It rested at the zero and that just wasn't going to work out. "Then you'll love this."

Dean didn't waste time in jumping onto the bed fully and seating himself between Cas' greedy open legs. He switched hands on Cas' prick and dove for the vibrator, slamming it back into Cas' compliant body.

The reaction was instant as Cas' dick jumped against Dean's palm and his legs twitched against his side. But that was just the beginning.

Dean smirked, enjoying this view, before clicking the dial to the first setting. The hum was quiet but Cas was not. The vibrator tingled Dean's fingers as he shoved it in and out, his other hand just as occupied by slipping up and around that shiny strawberry flavored head.

Cas cried out, his body unable to sit still as Dean thrust into him again and again. All the ex-angel could do was reach up higher, trying to lift himself for better presentation.

Dean dropped his hand from Cas' dick in order to kick the vibrator up to level number two.

"Shit," Cas actually swore.

"Shit," Dean joined in. He placed a hand against Cas' thigh and forced him to remain open and watched the purple end completely disappear as he held it all the way inside. Cas squirmed but Dean kept him firmly in place as he twisted it around, searching for just the right angle. As soon as he found it Cas knocked him over with a scream.

Literally. Cas punched him so hard in the shoulder he went rolling off the bed.

"Sorry," Cas was apologizing profusely as he reached for Dean, grabbing the only thing he could reach which just so happened to be his hair. "Sorry –sorry- You said to stop doing that. I- I didn't mean to push you. I just- Dean-"

"Fine," Dean huffed just to shut him up before slamming his mouth against those pouting lips. Cas wriggled underneath him, his hands climbing under Dean's shirt and slipping against the sides of his ribs. Stubble scratching, tongues twisting, and fingers flicking. With a hasty retreat Dean slipped out of the tshirt and dropped his boots on the floor as well.

He joined Cas back on the bed but only for a moment. The vibrator had slipped out completely, humming in place beneath Cas' ass. Well that just wasn't right.

Dean slipped off the bed and grabbed the tube of KY standing on his nightstand. He dripped a large amount into his hands and re-slicked the hot metal end of this torture device. Cas watched with wide eyes, his body rocking towards him, waiting to be filled again.

Dean took pleasure in slowly lowering the tip down, watching as Cas was forced to wait as he deliberately pushed it inside. Only when it was seated all the way did he rip it back and thrust it up at the magic angle he found before.

Cas screamed.

Dean gasped and quickly flicked the setting all the way up to three.

Crouching there, he watched closely as Cas convulsed, his body tensing and retracting more times than a fish orgasming out of water. Then he found himself face to face with that cock again, wondering just how much he could fit in his mouth.

Would it just be the one lick? How many licks did it take to get to the center of Cas' orgasm pop?

Shit, he'd been hanging with Gabriel for too long.

Dean popped open his mouth as far as he could jam it and gave it a try, nearly choking as Cas bucked up too hard, nailing the back of his throat and scraping along his teeth on the way. More apologies came from above but Dean ignored those and slowed the thrusting of the vibrator so he could concentrate on playing with his tongue. Cas didn't seem to mind. Dean slowed the vibrator altogether, holding it tightly up against the certain spot that had Cas swearing under his breath.

The sound of vulgarities mixed with Dean's name. Perfect.

One artificially flavored lick and Cas' body was coiling tight. Two licks and Dean felt the pain of being crushed between two powerful legs. Three licks and Dean's hair was being pulling from his scalp. Four and he felt a wet heat crash over his tongue as Cas peaked and cascaded cum down the back of his throat.

One more than he thought.

Dean leaned back and swallowed the salty aftertaste down, smirking at his handiwork as the vibrator started to slip back out of Cas' body on its own.

Game played and won.

Cas looked smashed, his hooded eyes glowing as he looked up at him. That full blush, those open legs just begging for more attention, that red pucker wishing for something more than some slick piece of metal. Late night fantasies be damned.

This was exactly what douche angel wanted. If ever a douche there was, Gabriel caused the most yeast infections.

That thought alone should have killed Dean's happy bone, but it didn't. Cas was just so fucking- fucking- fuck-fuck-fuck-EDIBLE. Edible, okay? He was fucking fuck-edible.

Gabe sure was gonna grill his hide till extra crispy, but hell. The burnt pieces were worth it. Right?

"Ah fuck. Fuck it," Dean growled. "What's the worst he can do?"

Dean scrambled to get out of the rest of his clothes, fairly certain he heard the rip of his boxers on the way down and that he missed the sock gap. He jumped back onto the bed and shifted his sedated companion. Cas didn't complain about that either.

Dean gripped the base of that purple imposter and chucked it to the ground, the vibrations now sounding against the wood of the floor. He didn't hesitate. He couldn't slow himself if he tried. With one sharp sweep he impaled Cas, pushing his entire cock deep inside the slicked up body. He screamed into Cas' shoulder, the heat of him coiling around every inch as he pressed deeper. He didn't waste time thinking this could be it, that he could just pull out now and not do a thing more. He would play the second round. Boss battle, bring it on.

He folded his arms under Cas' body, barely noticing as Cas gripped his shoulders. He picked Cas' torso off the bed and hauled him up to a better angle. He pulled back quick and slammed inside again, biting on Cas' neck so he wouldn't scream aloud.

Cas' legs scrambled to lift up his center, his hands falling to Dean's hips and pulling him back inside again. "Dean-"

The gasp of his name made a moan louder than his screams pass through his teeth and vibrate down Cas' spine. There was no fucking way, but maybe he could just do a couple thrusts and then be done. Just one or two. It just felt so damn good.

With speed and power he rarely had a chance to use anymore, he pounded into the man under him, bucking wildly until his vision started to blur. The coil that had been twisting his insides for over a week finally started to unwind.

Just one or two more.

His center heated, his body tensed, and before Cas could do such a thing as say his name again he was screaming Cas' name into his shoulder.

He had to stop. No. He was so going to lose. This was it. No turning back. But- ah-ah-ah fuck it- fuck it so hard-

"I am the pickle giver!" Dean screamed towards the headboard. Blissful whining escaped his mouths as he released himself, his body finally relaxing into the pleasure that swept from head to toe.

Game over.

Not a moment later he felt Cas' hands running up and down his sides, his hands pulling at his head. He lifted it, only to feel warm lips replacing those hands, trailing to his mouth. The stubble was welcome this time, scratching against his chin and hand. He gripped Cas close as he pressed into him, moving his mouth at a pace that matched his former motions.

Cas pulled away to breathe, "I've wanted to do that since I was a woman."

"Cas, I can honestly say no one has ever said that to me before." Dean smirked and ran his hands over this new terrain, his fingers grazing the same path they made before, when they were tracing the feathers of a dark tattoo. Man, that tat was cool. Cas still squirmed under the touch too. That was so damn hot. Everything was so damn-

"You lost the contest."

Dean laughed. He actually forgot about that for a sec. "Sure did."

"Does that mean I seduced you?"

"Yeah," Dean chuckled. "You're the sexiest Potato Head of them all."

"Potato Head?"

"Head again, Cas? You sure are quick on the rebound."

Cas' head tilted to the side again, those confused eyes bouncing around Dean's face and landing on his lips. With a small smirk reminiscent of the one he greeted Dean with he said, "So we fornicate now?"

"We forni-fuck plenty."

Dean and Cas were only human and after a couple of rounds they both needed some water and food. Dean offered to go grab it for them since Cas could barely walk –thank you very much- but that was totally the wrong thing to do.

"Did I just hear what I think I just heard?!" Gabriel skipped into the kitchen with Sam trailing behind as Dean made sandwiches. "Did you just pop Cas' cherry? And pop two of your own?" His eyebrows danced as he eyed Dean's dick.

"Shut it, Gabriel!" Dean yelled over a mouth full of ham as he covered his junk with the bread.

"What exactly is a pickle giver? Is Cassie the Dill keeper?"

"Why are you wearing socks?" Sam asked, looking at his feet.

"I said shut it ass hat," Dean said to Gabe and added, "You too, Sammy."

"Dean Winchester is no longer master of his domain! The king is dead!" Gabe clapped his hands and glitter fell from the ceiling and landed on absolutely everything –including the cheese. "Long live me!"

"Does that make you the queen?" Dean teased Sam as he tossed the Kraft at Gabe.

"Sammy makes a fine queen," Gabe winked and stuffed the slice in his mouth.

"Nope," Sam sighed. "My head still hurts too much for this. Sleep for me."

"Me too," Dean said with a wink as he headed back to his bedroom, sandwiches and beer in hand.

"Not with Cassie in your bed. Better take out the batteries or the energizer bunny won't fuck like the rabbit you-" Gabe was just about to follow but Sam grabbed his shoulder.

"Gabriel, don't make Dean mad."

Gabe smirked at Sam and watched as Dean turned the corner, "Just wait until tomorrow."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TBC


	10. Gabe's Victory

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A tiny tidbit of the BDSM nature in this chapter (ish). If knife play eeks you out then message me or email me (birdie7272@yahoo.com). I will tell you exactly what it entails and help you out so you don't miss the final chapter however I can. There is no cutting of skin, only of clothes.

 

* * *

Ahhhh. The sweet smell of victory.

Dried cum, bed sweat, and regret. The usual trio to greet you after a drunken night of ménaging and not usually an aromatic bouquet to entice feelings of superiority, but in this instance they did.

There was a short'n'sweet powwow between the four to determine the rules of Gabe's glorious victory celebration. He had reign over the other three for 24 hours and they had to do whatever he said as long as it wouldn't be physically harmful to themselves or each other.

Emotionally…there was a bit more leeway.

"You have got to be kidding me," Dean complained, staring daggers at the pretty pink bow sitting atop his present wrapped in an equally painfully bright box.

"Nope." Gabe giggled and winked at Cassie who was blushing the same fuchsia as the wrapping paper. Promises were promises. Deals were deals. Dean lost. Cassie won. "Put it on."

"No." Dean abruptly threw the box on the table. "Fuck no."

"Now, Dean." Gabe whined, loving every second of it. "Fair is fair."

"I am not wearing that."

"What is it?" Sammy chuckled, already knowing what was inside because Gabe gave him a sneak peek to the entertainment that morning.

"Dean," Cassie leaned in. "You lost."

"Because you cheated!"

"I told you I could wait. You couldn't. It's in the rules."

"Who the fuck cares if I don't?!" Dean's meaty fist slammed on the table as part of his temper tantrum. With his constant outbursts, it was a miracle Hulk hadn't torn apart everything they owned. "There's no consequences to this shit. I'm not dressing in fucking pink panties!"

"Then you won't get your dick back," Gabriel smirked. The Neanderthal turned to him with a confused expression and a ' _what_ ' just about to escape his lips but Gabe snapped his fingers before he got the chance.

Horror spread across Dean's face as his eyes dropped to the zip on his jeans. He quickly unbuttoned the top and pulled the fabric away, seething as he glared at Gabriel with more venom than Eve's snake. "WHAT DID YOU DO?"

"You were being a dick so I grabbed yours. Ew. Visuals." Gabe rubbed his hands on his pants just to be safe. "Maybe it'll even out your personality."

Dean looked back at his barren wasteland and with all the scary juice he could muster, he gave his deadliest glare face and lowest growl. "Put it back."

"Keep your panties on," Gabe said pointedly, shoving the box back across the table.

"PUT IT BACK!" he snapped.

Gabe sucked on the lemony taste of that pissed off face for a moment more before calmly continuing, "You'll get it back at the end of my twenty four. As long as you do what I say. If you don't, we'll even out the playing field and give you the titties and the bitties for your fabulous new wardrobe."

Dean had never looked so adorably furious before. His shaking hands grabbed the box – crumpling the beautiful packaging- and he stomped towards the bathroom, slamming the door and screaming incoherent threats on the top of his lungs.

Hulk mad. No like Hulk when mad.

"That's a good girl," Gabe smirked and turned to the other two.

"Did you really take his dick?" Sam asked, shifting uncomfortably in his seat.

Gabe chose to throw a wink his way and focus on the younger bro for a moment. "Cassie, Cas, Cassie. What to do with you. You're just so young and innocent. It's almost no fun. Almost. Let's see if we can play with that." He snapped his fingers and Cas' head tilted to the side, a perfect image of that naïve confusion. Gabe explained, "You're not going to know why but you're going to want some things from Deannie boy today. You probably won't even know what they're called. Maybe he'll explain a few to ya. He'll be without demonstration until he gets his dick back. That'll drive him mad." Gabe rubbed his hands together and slumped back into his chair. "Oh man, this is so fun for me. We'll call yours 101 Kinks in 24 hours. Sounds like a good movie. Write that down, Sammy!"

Dean soon rounded the corner, face red as a brick and dressed pretty in pink. "I look like a fucking Ken doll!"

"Who dresses their Ken dolls like that?" Sam teased.

Dean's ensemble was a personal favorite. The colors were black and pink. Hot, hot, hot pink. Dean's feet were decked out in a pair of custom made heels, two inches tall with little pink ribbons tied on top. Those macho, hairy legs were covered with the crisscross pattern of sturdy black stockings, held up by a pair of clips with small pink bows to match the shoes. The garters linked up with the most delicate pair of silk panties. They were bikini style in cut and laid flat against Dean's now dick-lacking body.

Hugging in that gut of a stomach was the cutest darn tooting corset the world has ever seen. It too was silk, matching the blinding color of the bottoms, and tied together in the back with the interworking of black string. The top and bottom had slips of lace circling from back to front, black and layered.

The anti-possession tattoo was on full view as there were no straps to this baby. The only strap was around his neck –a black choker necklace hiding his adam's apple.

The outfit was an obvious fav. On Dean-o, not so much-o. But that didn't stop him from snapping a few blackmail photos when Dean wasn't looking.

Gabriel peeked at Cassie to confirm his eyes were open wide, his legs suddenly crossing closed. Kink 1 down, 100 to go. Oh yeah, super fun.

Dean crossed his arms over his front, his hands poking at the point where his bulge would have pushed. It was a good thing Victoria didn't need to hide his secret. Gabe didn't need to see more than he had to and silk was a slippery slope.

"What if I have to piss?" Dean snapped, near foaming at the mouth. This playboy bunny was rabid. Too bad for Cassie most of the kinks on his list included some form of biting.

"Then wipe front to back, cus you're gonna be squatting like a lady." Gabriel started laughing his head off as Dean only grew angrier. Rabid playboy bunny Hulk? They'd need the shotgun pretty soon. Lucky for them, there were at least ten in this room alone. Winchesters.

"Dean," Cas suddenly squeaked, his body twitching in his chair. "I need to talk to you."

"What?!" Dean snapped.

"I have the sudden need to expel certain fluids over your chest. I don't understand why but I need you to meet me in the bathroom." He jumped up, and up again over the table, not even bothering to walk around. Startled, Dean almost went toppling in those killer heels and Cas had to grab him. "Now."

"What?!" Dean shoved him off. "NO!"

"Please. I'm going to explode if-"

"NO FUCKING WAY!" Dean scrambled away and tried to flee the room. "I already said no waterworks!"

"What are waterworks? Are they like fireworks? Do they explode as well?"

Gabriel clapped as Cassie ran after Dean. He sang, "Ninety-nine more kinks on the list, ninetynine more kinks!" He snorted and pushed back until his chair was half off the ground. "That is never going to get old, Sammy."

Sammy was just barely containing his own laughter but he was nervous too. He had every reason to be. He squirmed on his squeaky chair –the chairs really were taking a beating this week- and sighed, "Oh god."

Gabe smirked and leaned forwards, popping fresh gum in his mouth. "Don't worry kiddo. I promised to make it enjoyable for us both. I'm keeping that promise. Your branch of a dick will stay firmly attached to that tree trunk. Meet you at your room in an hour. I need to prepare."

This was going to be sweet.

And Gabe liked sweet.

Abouts the time an hour ticked by, Gabe went to pick up his man. Unfortunately, the panty-lined dimwit was outside the hall, catching Sammy's amused attention.

"Why are you staring at your junk?" Sam feigned innocence, "Oh right. No junk to stare at."

"Shut it," Dean snapped, glaring at the garters that guarded nothing.

Sam slapped his arm, "You'll get it back."

"It's so fucking weird. It's like I got phantom dick." Dean waived his hands around his groin, trying to locate the Houdini dick.

Hm. It must have sucked to be a Houdini groupie. An invisible big one.

Dean continued to growl, "It's moving but it's not even there! Where is it?"

"Resting in vinegar, pickles." Gabe made his dramatic entrance with a flourish, which instilled the most menacing scowl on Deanarino's face. "Whoa!" Gabe held out a hand. "Save some of that passion for the bedroom."

"I swear to god you better get me my dick back or I'll stuff this corset in your mouth and tie the bows around your throat and then I'll-"

"Asphyxiation? Has Cassie gotten to that kink yet?" Gabe leaned in as if he had a secret, "I heard it can take your breath away."

Sam gave a snort just as Cassie's timing stumbled onto perfect. The little bro came tumbling around the corner looking one hell of a hot mess.

Gabe went ahead and snapped on some [Cobra Starship](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4WLUMjdqzAs) for inspiration.

"Cas!" Dean perked up as soon as he saw him, already backing away on the defense.

Hadn't anyone ever told him the best defense was a good offense? Well…hard to go on the offense without the quarterback in play.

"Dean!" Cas gleefully ran towards him like Julie Andrews skipping through a field of aphrodisiac flowers, singing about the hills being alive with the sound of repression. Cassie urgently continued the number –even though it clashed with Gabe's background helper-, "I need to see you eat a cucumber." He gasped in a breath, "Slowly."

"No!" Dean shuffled back, tripping over his heels as he looked for the closest exit.

Cas pouted. "Then at least a plate of Oreos."

"Not now, Cas." Dean spun away, and Gabe suddenly regretted not adding a flowing skirt to the mix.

"Just one row." Cas complained, following. "Lick the icing off your hand. Please!"

"No!"

Cas huffed. "At least sit on a cake."

"What?!" Dean spun on the spot.

Gabe snapped his fingers and in Cassie's hands appeared a double decker devil's food cake with extra frosting on top. Oh, and a mini statute of Dean in his getup, with a pretty pink blush, red lipstick, and wide eyes batting thick black eyelashes. Betty Boop had some competition.

He snagged a bit of frosting and pushed Cas to run after Dean, cheering "You two kids have fun!"

"Should I be worried?" Sam asked, watching closely as Gabe licked his fingers clean.

"You?" Gabe scoffed. "No."

"So my dick stays intact _and_ I don't have to sit on a cake?"

"Even better." He spun to his baffled babe and shimmied his shoulders. "A date."

"A date?" Sammy wasn't enticed by the shuffle.

"You have to go on a date with me." Gabe shrugged at the incredulousness written over Sammy's face. "What? I can be classy sometimes."

"I don't believe that for a second."

"Just one date." Gabe smirked and winked. "Then I'll have you squeaking louder than a whore's mattress."

Sammy's eyes twinkled, "And there he is."

"But on your best suit Sammy! It's about to get ripped off."

"Then why would I put on my best?"

"Second best." Gabe flapped him away. "Let's go, chop chop."

While waiting for Sammy, Gabe was treated to another show of kink and hide.

"That's disgusting!" Dean stomped off, getting surprisingly good at walking in his new shoes. "No way."

Cas groaned. Poor frustrated sucker. "Then I'll put your toe in my mouth." Oooh, sucker having a whole new meaning in this case. "Come on! Dean! Stop being such a prude."

"Prude?" Dan flapped around to look for support and found the angel lurking near. "Gabriel! Take this-" Dean flailed at Cas like the most distracting inflatable tube man. "-off him. Make him stop."

"Mmmmmmmmmm," Gabe hummed and tilted his head with a bright smile, "No." Dean screamed and Gabe winked at Cas. "Go get 'em Cassie. Lock him down."

"Dean," Cas walked ahead of them, a thought popping into that clueless little head of his. "Where are the handcuffs?"

Dean glared at Gabe, "I hate you."

Gabe chuckled, "Get going, Barbie! He won't wait for you."

Speaking of waiting.

Sammy was taking far too long to tug on a tux. If he was tugging on anything else, Gabe was going to kill him.

"Yo, Sammy! What're you doing in there? I swear your hair looks fine! Move it or lose it!"

Gabe could hear him gulp from behind the door as Sam asked nervously, "Lose what?"

"You don't wanna know. So go, go, go!"

Sam ripped open the door and glared. Pretty and menacing. He looked like a vengeful angel sent from above. Of course, that wasn't true. Vengeful angels tended to have more blood splatter and less sex appeal. And appeal he had.

Every man looks good in a tux but Sammy Winchester couldn't be associated with such an adjective. No, no, no. He was more than just good. He was a six foot bundle of sex swaddled in the silk of seduction. More appealing by every layer waiting to be peeled off. The only thing making him more delectable was the pout he wore.

"My, oh, my." Gabe popped in a hand fan and started using it on himself. "Don't you clean up good."

"I'm very concerned about this."

Gabe grabbed his shoulder and squeezed. "As you should be."

'Date' was a strong word. Beneficial circumstances might have better explained what Gabriel had in mind. Kinda. All the elements to a date were there –dinner, wine, instrumental Frank Sinatra- but the whole 'mutual enjoyment' aspect was totally over rated.

It was too beautiful a sight to see Sammy in those threads. The ripping and the peeling would have to come later. For now, Sammy would take a seat and do his dating duty –AKA, hand feeding him lemon squares while Gabriel soaked in a hot tub of hot chocolate. Lemon squares and hot chocolate may not seem like they go together but the coco did wonders for his skin and lemon squares were one of daddy's best creations.

In the corner of Gabe's renovated room sat the wheel of awkward, holding every first date-y type question a person could ask and reluctantly answer. It was Sam's job to play show host and spin the wheel whenever Gabe clicked his fingers together. The angel did consider flipping that suit into something of the Vanna White collection but stopped himself.

Can I buy a 'Y' was he doing this? Because the buildup had to be good on this one.

The envelope opened and Sam read, "If you could invite a group of famous people, living or dead, to a dinner party, who would they be?" He made sure to drop the card to the ground and bitch face at the coco soaked master of dating. "Seriously?"

There was no need to stop the awesomeness at lame ass questions and hand feeding. Rub down time!

Sammy eyed him warily as he moved onto the last of the little piggy's on Gabe's feet, massaging as per his duty. "You're being extra nice to me. Well…not nice but…not…You said you were gonna get me back."

Gabe hummed without opening his eyes. Those gargantuan hands really held the touch. "Can't a fella be nice to his squeeze?"

"Not you."

"Am I really that bad?"

"Yes." Sam confirmed without hesitation. "You have a full day of telling me what to do and you're wasting it on something like this. Not that I mind. But why? What's your game plan? You warming me up to a threesome or something? Cus I will draw the line."

"Sammy," Gabe sighed and opened his eyes, hiking up to his elbows to lull the nimrod back into a false sense of security. "I can make people do what I want any day every day. The only difference today is you Winchesters aren't coming after me with the Loki skewer. The dynamic duo of 72 more kinks to go are distracted and I have you all to myself. Why waste that by having you dangle over a pit of octopi or force you to sing every word that comes out of your mouth?"

"Please don't."

"See, no fun." He slumped back down and wiggled his foot in Sam's face until he took it. "Today's special. We're gonna make it fun."

"That's actually kinda nice."

"Then you're gonna screw me senseless."

"Almost nice."

What was really nice was the way that massage turned from feet to back to scalp. Gabe had plenty of ladies and men to rub him down over the years but nothing unlocked his knots like Sammy fingers. The fact that they started to roam was just another spoonful of icing. Bonus boners were the best.

Whelp, that couldn't go anywhere just yet. There was still kiss assing to be done…and not even the dirty kind.

Onto part three. Wine. Lovely, lovely, wine.

A constant wine fountain trickled in the corner of the room and they slumped against the side of a couch, dipping in their glasses and taking swigs as they talked about whatever. Something about President Obama making a good dinner guest.

"You get a couple of drinks in him and I bet he'll be the life of the party," Gabe defended. "He'll be leading the cha-cha with maracas right down stick butt lane."

"Stick butt lane?" Sam laughed.

"You know," Gabe nodded and swigged his drink. "Congress."

"This is the weirdest date I've ever been on." Sam's smile made his dimples show and it was impossible not to rest a hand over those pokable dips. Sam's smile jumped before dropping again as he asked, "You ever done this before? Like, a date?"

"Why would I need to do that?"

"When you could just snap your fingers and have anyone in the world."

"Exactly."

"And you chose me because I'm just that lucky?"

"Billions of you humans and yet you're my fav." Gabe found himself leaning in too far, his thumb starting to circle on Sam's cheek. Those eyes were drawing him in, the tongue just peeking out along the edge of those lips… He slapped Sam's cheek and jumped up before he could change his mind. "Stop questioning yourself there Sammy lamb. You're gonna be in charge pretty soon."

"Me in charge?"

"Follow me."

Topsy turvy and tipsy, Gabe cut the date shorter than he intended to get to the good stuff.

Another sweep through the Bunker's corridors brought the delights of this victorious day.

The play's the thing and this show was getting to be quite revealing.

Cas was attempting to sprint after Dean but wasn't getting very far. He kept tripping over the pants around his ankles, screaming, "My posterior is pattable! Come back!"

Dean wasn't coming any time soon so the protests came back instead, "I'm not spanking you, Cas!"

"It doesn't need to be hard. Just tap it!"

"Yeah," Sam yelled from behind. "Just tap it, Dean!"

Both Sam and Gabe fell into a fit of laughter as Dean threw the Oreos in his hand back in Cas' direction- as if they were tiny sugary grenades that could hold the horny beast back.

"Why are we headed to the dungeon?" Sam asked, nerves back on the fritz.

"For the party." Gabe opened the doors with a snap and jumped into newly renovated room number two.

Fifty shades of horrible had nothing on this bad boy. Everything any human or world-traveling angel could imagine that had anything remotely to do with the pleasure of the body and/or vessel rested within those four walls. Most could be found lining the walls but in the center of this stockpile of sin-heaven rested a padded table complete with head rest, partible leg rests, and angle adjustments. All at Sam hip height.

Oh, and a packet of skittles waiting on top.

Gabe shuffled in, running his hand through the air as he pointed out the goodies. "Angel cuffs and a thousand playthings. Cassie may be closing in on this later, but for now it's all yours. You are now in charge, big boy."

"In charge?"

So adorable when so confused. Gabe jumped back and lowered his voice, reaching a baritone that could break through the shocked fog surrounding those hair crowned ears. "I'm telling you, to tell me what to do."

Sam's eyes flickered around the room. "But I haven't thought about-"

"Please," Gabe scoffed. "Anyone who thinks about fucking me as much as you do has some ideas. I can see some forming now."

Gabe didn't dive into Sammy's mind to see if any ideas were actually forming. The fun in this was the surprise after all.

 _Surprise suprise, then take the prize_ , he thought with a smirk.

Based on Sammy's eyes glazing over, he must have thought of something.

"Safe word?" Sam asked, still distracted by the playroom, grabbing the cuffs Gabe pointed out.

Gabe smirked, "Collywobbles."

"Still?" Gabe raised an eyebrow and Sam shoved him off, "Whatever. I'm not even a little bit shocked. Go on then. Table. On your back."

Gabe happily jumped onto the table and positioned himself to the best of his ability while still fully clothed in his jeans and t-shirt. He raised his arms over his head, waiting for Sammy to clasp them together. It took him a right too many seconds to get his ass over there, but he eventually did what he was supposed to do and clicked them into place, tossing the well placed skittles onto the floor in the process.

"Hey, we coulda used those," Gabe pouted.

Sam leaned over him for an upside down kiss worthy of Spider-Man's approval. When he pulled back his voice was low and gruff, all sorts of appetizing with his teasing tone. "The only thing getting used today is you."

The cravings were hitting him a bit lower than his stomach and he needed more than just a taste. Sam leaned away before he could steal it so Gabe curved his body up, giving him full view of the sumptuous smorgasbord he was snubbing. "A room full of toys and you're not even going to play with one of them?"

"I never said that."

There were so many options. Sammy was taking his time looking over them all, shrugging off his jacket and rolling up his sleeves. Yes, oh, yes. Alright, so he may or may not have had ulterior motives for the romanticizing. Schmoozing Sammy was the only way to get him to play along. Sam needed to play in order to get his kumuppins. But what would his choice in toy be? The ball gag or the spider gag? The whip? The riding crop? The handy helper, the cock ring, the beads, the plug, the nipple clamps, the-

"Ice cubes?" Gabe asked, crestfallen.

"You're a bit too excited for this." An evil, evil grin spread across that knowing face as Sam shook the disappointing looking bucket. Why was that even in here? Sam was obviously trying to drive him insane on purpose. "You need to cool down."

"I could cool down with a large splash of lube. It's right over there." Gabe wrenched himself up, pointing with the tip of his toe towards the back corner of the room. "Next to the dildos and the sex swing."

"This will be fine."

"Fine?"

An annoyed sigh met his complaint and Sam rolled his eyes and deadpanned, "Amazing. Fantastic. I'll have you begging. Better?"

"Sir," Gabe dropped his feet and leaned back as far as he could and gave the most off-angle salute a person could give. "Yes, sir."

"Good." Sammy dumped the ice bucket to the ground and whipped out the knife hiding inside it.

It was a slick and small Swiss army knife. Something more likely found in a Winchester's back pocket than any pack of gum. "Now hold still."

There we go. Knife play was better than frostbite any day.

Bad boy Sam was definitely there somewhere. Just as predicated.

Gabe sunk back onto the table as Sam did a lap, the knife glittering in the lights overhead. It would be a lie to say Gabe's never found himself in this position before, but to have someone with a knife who'd actually used one before was new. This potential was cutting edge.

Gabe peeked through hooded eyes when Sam drew near, the tip of the blade sliding over the collar of his shirt and steadily skimming all the way down to his stomach. There, the ice-chilled blade ducked under his shirt and laid flat against the sensitive space just below his belly button. His body twitched and his muscles ached to move but he knew a twitch too sharp and that end would be cutting more than just belly button lint. Not that it mattered with the whole archangel thing but still, the game had to be played to be fun.

Sam grabbed that shirt in his fist and leaned over Gabe's face, dark eyes catching his as the knife slipped through the fabric, slicing all the way up to his neck. There he held the cool metal to his collarbone as he crushed equally chilled lips against Gabriel's mouth.

Someone had their fingers –lips and tongue- in the ice jar. That cool mouth did a surprisingly good job at heating him up. Distracting him too. He didn't even realize his frisky companion ripped off a chuck of his shirt until it was covering his eyelids, blocking him from seeing where this was going.

Johnny Frost pulled away and dropped the knife back in the bucket with a clunk as he dipped down for a cube, pulling the shirt away from Gabe's body and dropping the tip of the square onto his skin. Not nearly as fun as the spike tipped ball Gabe had his eye on, but it sent chills down his spine all the same.

Like a Minnesota blizzard, there was no telling which direction this freeze out was going to fly. The lazy patterns drawn across his exposed skin were actually more of an annoyance than a turn on and he made the tease aware of that, but he was ignored.

As Gabe throbbed and whined, pulling on his cuffs, waiting for something fun to actually start, he barely noticed the first cube puddling out. Only when the water slipped down the padding and very cold and sneaky drops crawled their way to the band of his jeans and wiggled against his crack did he sigh and say, "You have me begging for more hot chocolate. You know, I'm pretty sure it goes ice first then steamy sex and chocolate. Not-"

Gabe squeaked at the interruption to his complaining. Sam decided it was the best time to sneak attack him with two ice cubes pressed directly into sensitive nipples and a warmed up mouth licking at his navel and biting down hard at the point where buttoned jeans lay across his hips.

Surprise sensory overload did wonders to a numb body.

"Houston, cancel the chocolate. We have take off!"

Sam smiled against Gabe's stomach and chewed heat back into every inch of chilled out skin while keeping those torturous little cubes pressed against his nipples, now pointing due polar north. His rocket was prepared to launch full throttle by the time Sammy had licked up every trickle of water, leaving him a wet mess of hot and cold.

When three more cubes were placed against his chest his anxiousness wasn't having any of it. Nomore on the rocks. He was ready to rock and rumble. Slow as you go was not what he had in mind at all. "C'mon Sammy." He nearly begged. "I played the waiting game already. I don't need to meet Godot. Let's go!"

Sam pulled away from him, taking his heat and leaving him as cold as outer space as water trickled over his sides and puddled under his back.

"I'm not the lady of the lake," Gabe added, squirming as his jeans started rubbing him the wrong way. The stupid water was making them chaff. "I don't need to be in water to take Excalibur!"

Sam chuckled, farther away now. "Is that you begging?"

Gabe groaned, "Sure. Whatever. Just move it."

"You're awfully bossy for someone who put me in charge."

"Backsies then. I'm in charge, and you need to hurry up. Rules are rules. So hop to it and do it!"

Sam was so obviously pouting, even if Gabriel couldn't see him. It took a good thirty seconds too long for him to say anything. "Fine. But next time, I want to play it my way. I want to take you apart for hours on end, just like I promised I could. We were barley getting started. And there are so many things in this room."

"Angel here! I can bring them back into play any day. And it's not my fault you've suddenly stopped with the frenzy fuck fantasies. I've gone days without your stuffing and a constant stream of Sammy spamming jamming up the works."

"Not my fault you read my mind."

"You want to snail pace it next time? Fine." He thrust his hips into the air, humping at every angle. "But let's get this show on the road."

"No worries. I'm going."

"Hakuna ma-fuck me!"

Sam shoved those partible legs open and locked them into place, stepping into the hole they left, and Gabriel hoped he was on his way to shoving himself in another hole pretty soon. Thank the inventor of KY that Sam was actually listening to him, or this party would have been cut short way too soon. Revenge was best served cold but come on.

With practiced ease, Sam slit the knife through the bottom cuff of the jeans and gradually slid it up the inside of Gabe's legs, just enough for him to feel the edge of the blade's chill, but never touching his skin. That chill slid to more sensitive areas and Gabe stayed as still as possible as it climbed to his very commando center. There Sam toyed with the seam, pressing and twisting and bunching and… pressing and…again…and… "Are you having trouble down there?"

Sam huffed and continued to fight the fabric. A battle that had Gabe trying to pull his balls back to pre-puberty status. More grunts came and Gabe stared down in blindfolded horror as the edge of the blade brushed something very much not cotton.

Sam growled, "It's stuck on the seam."

"Would you just-" This was not the tugging Gabriel had in mind. That blade was far too close to the goodies for his comfort.

"Jeans are hard to cut okay?"

"Just use-" The rip made Gabe balls curl. "I did not order the Brazilian!"

Sam grumbled, "I got it! Shut it."

Gabe tried not to flinch as the rest of his jeans were cut along the seam down his other leg. Sam didn't bother cutting them off completely, probably too embarrassed by his first go at the good stuff, but they were easy to move away.

Gabe closed his eyes tight and waited for the painfully slow process Sammy probably played out. He readied himself for a chilling finger to probe and prod unnecessarily so he could finally put his plan into-

"OHhh-" Gabe gasped and his grace jumped as he felt all those beautifully thick inches shove straight into him – no prep or hassle. Sam just impaled him, filling him to the brink as slacks pressed against ripped up jeans.

"What?" Sam asked with a cocky raise of the brows and grabbed onto the table, plowing those hips straight into Gabe with mighty speed.

The world blurred behind his blindfold and Gabe thrashed, his hands pulling painfully tight against those cuffs –a part of him wishing for the fuzzies they used before. But dammit, this was the ticket. This rough, macho madness was getting him right off. The cubes of ice left on his body rolling right off as well, trapped under his hot sin.

Sam was relentless and it was just what he needed.

"Don't-" he continued to gasp as his grace pulsed with every thrust. "Don't stop. Don't stop. Don't-"

"Stop?" Sam asked innocently and completely and abruptly pulled his hips entirely away, stepping back from the table.

Gabe screamed and Sam chuckled, thrusting himself back inside. "Don't worry. I told you I could go a long time." He picked up again, adding his hand to the mix.

Oh mylanta, that was what he needed –Sammy fingers. His grace was burning brighter and brighter and he could feel himself climbing higher and higher. This fast and frantic was really doing it for him. He was so fucking close.

Then Sam continued over the moans, "In fact. Gabe?" He seemed to actually ask for him.

"Present," he panted back as those pistoning hips slowed and Sam's fingers wrapping painfully tight around his base. "Fuck-" Gabe cursed as he flopped back onto the table.

Sam pinched hard, leaning over, another smug smile audible on his lips. "You cheated. Didn't you?"

Gabe lay there a moment, letting the silence linger. Could he ever really outsmart the smarty Winchester? His only answer was a wiggle of the brows and a wiggle of the hips.

"That won't make you come." Sam squeezed tighter on the torturous hold.

"Your timing is worse than Santa on Easter."

Another painful squeeze, "Answer." An ice cube was suddenly thrown atop the head of his cock and the scream was more than necessary at that point.

Who the fuck cared anymore? It was so damn worth it. "Night before last." Gabe confessed through his locked jaw. Sam pinched harder and moved the ice along the bottom of his shaft. Gabe whined and sputtered, "You were wearing cutoffs!"

Sam's head titled to the side and gave an accusatory stare. "That's it?"

"Yeah." Sam pinched even harder and pulled out of his body altogether, the ice cube now nearing the place his totally hot cock had been. No, no, no. This was not the plan! "Unless you count dream wanks," Gabe quickly added and tried to chuckle but Sam did not thrust back inside as he expected. "You're the one that said dreams don't count!"

"For humans! And I never even said that. Besides, you are an angel. You don't dream. You walk. It counts. When?" Sam stepped away from him taking his hand and any sort of contact with him. "When?"

Gabe squirmed on the table, exaggerated shaking of his head shifting the cuffs and ripping more of his tattered clothing. "The truth? You can't handle the-"

"Gabriel!"

"Day two!" he gasped, desperately trying to reach out for another touch. "After breakfast."

"Really?"

"Who cares?! It was a dream!" He started thrusting into the air. "Now, come on!"

"I don't think so. You made us all think you won. Even I beat you."

"Congratulations. Give the man a prize!" Gabe made a show of gesturing down at his wrecked body. "Oh, hey look. There you go!"

"You know I don't like cheaters," Sam said with an evil growl. "Cheaters don't get to come."

"I didn't have sex with you!"

"That's not the point."

"It was hard!"

"Not like the rest of us."

"Can we not talk about the past? I wanna focus on making you feel so good, you feel like you're floating." A snap of the fingers and Gabe's wish came true. Sam's now naked body lifted off the ground and spun him until his back was pressed up against the ceiling. Gabe joined him a moment later, eye and hand restraints off, straddling Sam's center, and shoving himself down on that beast of a cock. "Oops. Guess I cheated. Again."

"We're on- you- we- it's- we're on the ceiling?! Those cuffs were fake!"

"I waaaaas going to have some fun. Revenge is a dish best served in sex. But you just had to go and ruin it with your morals. Oh, Sammy. I was gonnga get my jollys out, then get you back for being a little shit all week. Keep you on the brink of orgasm while I fucked you slow for the rest of the night. Oh, and I mean that. All. Night. Maybe use a real toy or two on you. But you just had to go and screw my game. This works too."

Gabe winked as Sam was left to sputter, holding onto Gabriel for dear life as he rode him hard, slamming his nearly finished body back up to where it was, just barely on the edge of the best orgasm of his life…or at least of this year. There was this one time in 546 AD where he was kissed by a siren and ahoy sailor! Nothing topped that crash landing.

Sammy's eyes were wide as he wriggled up towards the light fixture, a tiny little fly caught in the spider web of Gabe's angel mojo. In Sam's freaking loud mind he was freaking out over his adrenaline rush, the floor so far below and Gabe pinning him with such pleasure. No safe word was spoken so Gabe continued to buck into him, panting as he neared the finish. Just on the edge. So close. Just a few thrusts more. He could feel it nearing. That's it. It was there. Almost. He could- could- could-

"URGHhhh-" Gabe yelled. This build would not burst. This damn would not break. This balloon would not pop. Why the fuck wasn't he coming yet?! "What is happening?"

Sam's fretful face fell into a smug little smile. "Curious thing," he panted as Gabe started to slow. "As soon as Dean lost, I went to the library and a book didn't run from me. I was actually able to open it and read it. I checked, I could go online. And I reckon that if I tried to open the door, I could do that too. Couldn't I, Gabriel?"

Smarty bombarty ruining the party.

Gabriel resumed slow thrusts and tossed his head to the side. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Sure you don't." Sam glared as best one could do while pinned to the ceiling. "But get this. You know what I found in this mystery book? A spell. A very interesting spell. A chastity spell. A very powerful one."

Chastity. The mother of all evil. Well, except the mother of all evil but that bitch was dead.

Whatever. There were only a few books out there with Enochian secrets and also the Angel tablet but that was gone and there was no way Sammy got his hands on _Enochian Rhymes to Abstinence_. The Men of Letters probably had one stuffed up their asses somewhere but there was no way he'd even be able to read it. Unless…"Castiel?"

Sam's smile confirmed all. "He didn't know what he was helping me with."

Gabe's jaw twitched. "After all I did for him."

"Didn't actually need him much. Told you I could go on the internet again. I found the webpage I bookmarked on Enochian translation and pronunciation."

"You didn't."

Sam chuckled darkly, "I kinda did. You're not coming, Gabriel. You're not coming for a while. I did the small version. I'd give it a week. Maybe two."

Hell-o kitty no.

Gabe jumped a hand to his cock and started vigorously rubbing himself off, trying harder than ever to make himself come. He started riding Sam again at the same time, pounding him into the ceiling and crying out as the orgasms continued to jump out of reach.

He tried to find the source of the damn curse, tried to rid it from his body but he couldn't find the blasted thing. It had to be real angel magic mojo jojo.

"You bastard," he spat and Sam panted a laugh. "I can just make you undo it. You have a half a day left of doing what I say."

Sam's laugh continued, "There is no counter spell."

"There's always a counter spell."

"Look for yourself. Go ahead and try."

Gabe jumped off and Sammy seeds fell from the ceiling, raining down over him in a mockery of a shower with thunder moans sounding overhead. He flicked the semen off and jumped to the library to find the cursed book Sam tinkered his toy with.

The book was laying right there on the table, right behind horny and hornier.

"I need you to put ice cubes down my pants and sing the 'Jingle Bell Rock'."

Dean's groan was losing muster, "Why the 'Jingle- What the hell happened to you?" he laughed as he spotted Gabe in his lost in the jungle look.

"Your brother is a complete ass," he huffed and flicked the two away with his fingers. Alone, he picked up the book and skimmed in from back to front in less than ten seconds. Mother fucker. "Asshole!"

The fucking spell had no counter spell because it was meant for fucking angels. No angel would need a fucking chastity spell to be undone. Apparently. And especially not with humans because that was blasphemous. Or whatever. Which meant he was stuck with fucking blue balls for the remainder of its existence.

There had to be a loop hole.

Sam was now safely on the floor level when Gabe came jumping back into the room. He passed right by the asshat and jumped to the sex toys. Dildo number 32 has a fleshlike feel with a vibrator setting. If he couldn't get off on that, nothing would do it.

"You read the book yet?" Sam asked with a smirk.

Gabe ignored him and sat right on down on top of 32, his head reeling with pleasure the instant he turned it on. He fucked himself hard, giving Sammy a good view as his hands worked furiously fast over every inch of himself.

He spat between thrusts, "Spell tied to humans. Not human. Need to come. There's a loop hole- in my hole."

Sam's dark eyes watched intently as Gabe rubbed himself raw –never coming across that finish line. Another puddle left by the victorious Sammy spilled onto the floor before he left, leaving Gabe alone to enjoy the victories of being the winner: absolute and pure frustration.

Karma was a bigger bitch than Chastity.

* * *

 

Bobby walked up to the bunker door that afternoon, his books and ingredients packed in his car. He hoped this –whatever this was- that could get past all the Bunker's defenses was easier to break than they thought, cus he couldn't take much more than a cold beer at the moment. Stupid people were the bane of existence and far too many existed for Bobby's liking. He was done with idiotic pinheads who couldn't tell their left foot from a troll's ass. If one more stupid-

Son of a bitch.

He walked right through the easily opened Bunker door and yelled over the balcony, "Did you morons try opening the door?"

"Yes," Castiel's voice called up from the table below.

Next to him was a very disturbing sight. Maybe the lack of sleep took more out of Bobby than he expected. He snapped as he looked at Dean, "What in the name of blue blazes are you wearing boy?!"

"Don't ask, Bobby." Dean dropped to the table, his corset and choker still painfully visible. "Don't ask."

"Dean," Castiel turned to Dean. "I want to take you while Bobby watches."

"Not now, Cas!"

Bobby'd seen plenty in his day. Hell, more than any he knew. But he was not prepared for this shit. Not at fucking all. He needed a cold beer, a nap, and research to figure out what the hell universe he fell into.

He could see Sam entering from the corridor and hoped to god he'd get some answers from him. That was until he saw the tiny angel clinging onto his leg, dragged along like an adult sized child throwing a temper tantrum and if his clothes were anything to go by, Sam had been dragging him a long while.

"What in the name of Sam Hill?" Bobby gasped.

"Hey, Bobby," Sam nodded, appearing not to be phased by the leech on his leg.

"Sammy, c'mon." Gabriel begged, not letting go. And whatever the hell kinda power cord was trailing that ass' ass, Bobby really didn't want to know. "Sammmmm. Take if off me. Let me come! I need to get my O-face on!"

"What the hell going on here?" Bobby said more to himself than anyone else but Castiel –ever thoughtful- answered anyway.

"Gabriel had not had sex the longest and now has control over the three of us for a day. I want Dean to engage in multiple sexual acts with me as he wears his new lingerie. Such as painting his face in my semen and dancing like Bob Fosse. He is refusing me because he does not have a dick. And I believe Gabriel has a garment of some kind making him unable to come or have sex and Sam must hold the key. Perhaps it is locked the same way the doors were. Since you were able to open the doors, maybe if you touch Gabriel's-"

"I'm outta here," Bobby huffed and sped right out the door to the closest bar, hopefully back to his own reality. This was a witch's spell or Trickster or some shit and he apparently needed to figure it out. "Idjits."

* * *

THE END

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The episode of Seinfeld you need to watch is "The Contest", Season 4 episode 11. If you need help finding it online, just ask.
> 
> This fic has been weird guys. Really freaking weird. And awesome. For a side project (I admittedly did not have a lot of time for) I'm quite proud of it. If one can be proud of such things….I can manage.
> 
> The goal was a laugh a chapter. I'm hoping some of you reached that goal. I think Cas' POV won all the votes but the others were fun to write too.
> 
> I've had so many lovely reviews on this, so much positive feedback. It truly has been quite wonderful. A special shout out to my guest reviewers as well. Know I did read yours and I'm very happy with all of ya :) I'm very shocked and appreciative. I am a potato at writing. Not an ugly potato or anything. A baked potato. Who hopes to achieve the higher, supreme baked potato status with the bacon bits and everything (I really do have a thing with bacon). One day I will get there. With practice and a bit of sour cream :D


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